to be a bit resentful about counting this as annual leave

[Ceci03]

So I was given an appointment to get a nat. ins. number - have recently moved to UK. It's during work hours. It'll take me about half an hour each way from work, and then however long I have to wait, or how long it takes. Luckily it's 1pm so some of it is in my lunch (half an hour for lunch) but boss says I need to take a half day a/l. I looked it up in the company regs and it only talks about medical appointments or dentists - go in your free time if you can, if not make it up. I asked her could I make up the time by coming in early if it doesn't take too long. She's thinking about it. Just feel my a/l is getting eaten away on this kind of stuff, and that she could be bit nicer about it - have moved from another country to take this job and no accommodation given, no expenses, I had to take a whole day when my furniture came too late for me to get to work that day. Don't mind that so much. But if I'm 5 mins late I have to take it out of my lunch. But she doesn't count if I'm in early - like today I was in 20 mins early. I'm often in early, or would leave a few mins late, but if she's going to be like this, I think I'm going to be out the door dead on time and go for a coffee if I'm in early. Just finding it hard to adjust. I don't think it's the 'company' I think it's just her. Realise how lucky I was with my last boss - she was so understanding of a sick kid, or traffic, or a delayed train. there was never an issue, and so in return I never had any problem staying late or working thru lunch. Work in an office.

Aren't you the poster who before Christmas had only been there a few week, had sick leave, was late in for taking ds the doctors, was late another time for another reason etc? If so I think your manager is just trying to ensure good timekeeping. Different companies /offices have different rules and if you've been late numerous times or not turned up for some reason I can understand why she is making you email her.
You need to understand this job has different rules and you need to be on time and use your annual leave (planned in advanced) when you have deliveries etc, that's not your workplaces' issue.

I've been here about 2 months. I have 20+years experience. I'ts a "medium" level job. Had to do 2 interviews - it was hard to get the job, they were looking for a lot - I was so happy!!!!

Yeah you're right - in the first few weeks it was tough - I had 2 sick kids at different times - was late in twice as I was in the doctor's with them, and I didn't have a doctor and had to register. I took a day sick leave. I worked til 3.30 on the day before, struggling, and she counted it as a full day of sick leave. Yeah it seems a lot, but it's been a massive upheaval. I took a day's leave for delivery of furniture. So yeah, I guess I'm a pain in the backside really. Just think a bit of leeway and encouragement and yeah, kindness, would go a long way. It's been tough.

I wonder if she's previously had someone working for her who was perpetually late and taking odd bits of time off, and so she's decided to be draconian from the outset this time. Hopefully while she's thinking about it she'll notice your extra time this week and realise she can trust you.

She seems like an absolute pain in the arse

As soon as you are out of your probation period (assuming you are in one), hit your boss with a statutory flexible working request.

And petty at that. Don't give them any more than you need to - sounds like the type of atmosphere that can become soul-destroying as if you go the extra mile, there'll be no one thanking you for it and no leeway granted in return. Frankly it's pathetic.

Sounds like she does not trust you.

You do sound a little like you should be entitled to manage your own hours, whereas it does not sound like that is your workplace's ethos.

If you are expected to be at your desk working at 9, then surely she is entitled to see you at your desk working at 9. If she doesn't, then you are not doing your job how she expects you to be doing your job.

Right or wrong, you are not meeting her expectations, hence micro-management.

Your boss sounds like an utter dick.
I advise you to look for another job.
This kind of micromanagement and miserliness about your start and end times, and lunch breaks, will grind you down.

On the one hand, it does sound as if she is extremely petty, regarding you having to 'clock in' every morning. How demeaning!

But on the other hand, I wouldn't expect to be given time off for letting furniture men in or for life administration etc, whether i could make it up or not.

Could you start looking for another job? (Easier said than done I know, but this type of micromanagement just eats away at your soul).

“ Anyway, to my mind she is not doing herself any favours. She has no kids and lives nearby so I really don't think she understands the pressures of being a single mum. Cest la vie I guess. She is "within her rights" - I don't work well with those kind of people tbh.”

You don’t know anything about what pressures she is or is not under, regardless of whether she’s given birth or not. She is your new manager and her personal life is none of your business and tbh if your disrespect and dislike for her is as obvious at work as it is on this thread then i’m not surprised she’s not doing you any favours. She doesn’t know you. You’ve just started. She doesn’t know whether you’re missing in action at start time because you’re having a wee or if you’re genuinely a bit flaky.

Being new in a job is when you go all out to show how great you are, not take the sulk and decide your boss is a shit boss who doesn’t understand the pressures of single parenthood because she’s not giving you the benefit of the doubt when you’ve (apparently) been coming in late - it’s not a great footing to start out on. Honestly you sound a bit like you think you’re doing her a favour working there and if she’s getting the whiff of that off you then that might be why you’re finding your professional relationship on the rocks after just a short acquaintance. (And i am normally one to swim against the tide when it comes to mn’s groupthink about presenteeism, protestant work ethic, punctuality fetish - but i think you’ve got off on the wrong foot with this woman, but it doesn’t mean she’s a draconian wanker, she might just be one of those people who needs to know people well before giving them the benefit of the doubt).

She sounds ridiculous.

Any company that has moved you here should give you the time (and pay any related expenses) to obtain the NI number.

Your boss sounds like an absolute idiot

I think in many jobs you have to earn the trust required for a more flexible approach.

Spend a few months demonstrating that you are hardworking and reliable, and then start pushing for more flexibility. If I had a new starter who was regularly late and looking for half days out of the office without taking leave I'm afraid my assumption would be that they weren't going to be great.

@Ceci03 - she doesn’t like you, you don’t like her.
She is your line manager.
Who do you think needs to change their approach?
Usually management is very understanding with the odd request.
I would look into why this is different with her.
People tend to help each other.
Your attitude might need some polishing....

She’s micromanaging your start times. Unfortunately it seems like your absences before Xmas are counting against you. I think you’re just going to have to prove your reliability now.

Set the alarm on your phone for 5 mins before you’re due to start work, then email her. See if she notices that you’re now only ‘coming in’ on time.

How are you getting paid and are on the payroll and everything without a NI number?

It's this kind of one-sided attitude from your boss that means staff stop doing any favours whatsoever. Why should you give them 20 minutes each day if they won't allow you to make up 5? It just breeds a working environment where there's a stampede of staff out the door at 5.30pm on the dot.

Our staff often work late if they've got something to finish because they know they can log it and take the time off later, which they often then use to tag on to holiday or Christmas. We don't like lateness, but people can always make it up if they are. Only continual lateness really gets questioned.

If we weren't as flexible, people would be out the door at 5.30 on the dot and work would drag over to the next day and ultimately it then takes longer to get back in to it, rather than just spend an extra half hour to deal with it on the day.

YANBU OP - Does your boss has a relatively high turnover of staff by any chance?

One one hand - as you are telling it to us - she does sound like she might be being a bit micro managing and a bit lacking in flexibility, but, as @MadameButterface said on P1, 'flexibility' tends to come after you have proved yourself, in most jobs.
From what @FitzChivarly has remembered, and you then confirmed, you've not started off well, and got your "credit" in.
A new member of staff should be going above and beyond in the first instance and you've not been able to show her so far that you do that. Once 'lax' timekeeping becomes the norm, it is much more difficult to pull it back, better for a manager to establish from the start what the hours and expectations are and then relax once the new employee has proven themselves.

All that said, where the business model does allow it, I can't understand why all employers aren't more flexible with flexi hours. Does depend on the job role though.

I agree that norm is that flexibility is something that is earned, not the default. Sounds like you have not made a good first impression.

The question is did the compnay transfer you or did you simply apply for a job abroad?

You have been there two months and already you have been sick, late, taken time off for admin, (we all have admin!), been awol when she has looked for you and clearly neither like nor respect your boss.

If I were your boss I'd have already flagged you up a s a problem. If I were a colleague I'd be wondering whether you were going to pull your weight. Nobody knows you yet. You might be lovely, reliable, hard-working - or you might not. Think if you were employing a nanny or childminder would you give her this much time off?

been awol when she has looked for you

Hardly awol, not just at her desk. Nobody is at their desk for 8 hours straight -we all need to go to the loo, get a drink, just have a walk round to stretch the legs.

OP there are ways around the email thing. You can either set a rule which sends the email every day at the same time (see if she notices!) but obviously remember to switch it off if you are sick or on holiday; or if you have a phone you can get work emails on, send it from there. If someone is so micromanaging (I knew someone many years ago who had to "clock in" by sending her boss an email every day too) then you play them at their own game.

Effectively you are having to clock in when you arrive . That's ridiculous - you are not on a production line in a factory where lateness will affect the flow of product.

Personally, I would e-mail to let her know I was in and then go and get myself a coffee, or read a book fr 10/15 minutes until I was at my starting time - set an alarm on your phone so you don't start late and give her a chance to complain.

It depends what the job is. I used to work withsomeone who started at 9. She would switch on her computer, then take off her coat, go to the loo, get water and coffee, put her lunch in the fridge etc etc. And never start before 9.45.

Again - if you were the employer - say of a childminder/nanny, or you booked a driving lesson or tutoring session or anything that you pay for and you wouldn't be so happy with a person not being there at 9.
Or if you were a colleague picking up the slack you might have mentioned it to your boss.

If someone starts at 9 I would expect them to be at their desk at 9.

And we don't know what the OP does or how she is paid or how it affects the business if she is not there for five minutes