Thank you @There @Wilding
I think there is a part of me that is worried it's me as there were two previous tenants that left and their behaviour, in the end, was horrible and I don't know why it is happening.
The first was a guy who was here when I moved in. He was a stand up comedian by day, library porter by night. He was off sick most of the time and seemed to b having a nervous breakdown of sorts. The landlady was occasionally here so one of the rooms was left free for her. its a cold, small room. There was another young woman here who had been in the house about 4 months but was out most of the time.
I was out at work every day but after a while it was noticeable that his behaviour became erratic and like a kind of controlled irritation.
He did zero cleaning but continuously acted as though he was in charge. The other woman fawned over him a bit as she was in her 20s but he was younger than me and and I thought he was quite fake. He became increasingly unreasonable and another woman moved in .The garden had been badly neglected and over grown for some years with piles of rubbish. I cleared everything and carefully weeded around the landladys plants. She told me that she had spent a lot of time getting everything in place and not to take the plants out just the weeds. I was happy to tidy up what I could as I wanted to get the
garden ready for summer. This is a very cheap house in London and so, while its not perfect I am happy to take a view that I will do what I can. Landlady was never here so another woman moved in. I think in hindsight, that this guy who had low social confidence and seemed to be struggling in London (and later told us he had just spent 15 years smoking marijuana)struggled to then go from a house where he was largely on his own to living with 3 people full time.
Some strange things happened then. He came on a bit strong to the new woman and she manipulated him a bit I think. I kept out until I came home and saw they had ripped everything out of the garden - all the plants, all my pots of herbs that I had grown, all the shrubs and fruit trees.
Landlady came by a few weeks later and commented on how nice the garden looked.
I was stunned as I had done all the work to look after it and they had just ripped everything out and she said nothing.
There started to be big rows between him and this woman - she stood up to him and they clashed badly.
The first woman left and we got a guy in. He seemed ok, easy going, pulled his weight. Eventually the first guys behaviour deteriorated so much I contacted landlady who at this point was going through a personal crisis of her own. Guy became irrational, paranoid and aggressive. One day did something so bizarre i left thinking he has lost it and tried to have no further engagement with him. He started going to Thailand (off work) and met someone out there and then moved out for good. When he left we got a young woman in - all good, got on very well with her and then guy started playing up. Complained about cleaning but he wasn't doing any. He then hid a camera in the kitchen and recorded us (I wrote about this on another thread). He had become increasingly belligerent to me and used to twist everything to 'neg'. I ignored it, got on with other girl and our 4th tenant moved in who left after 6 months because he wasn't cleaning. So this is where this latest girl comes in. She moved in.
I had huge reservations about someone moving in whilst there was guy who had recorded us here. I spoke to the police about what I culd do and they advised I speak to landlady as it was up to her. I wrote down clearly what had happened but one of the girls who had lived here asked to come back for the summer with her boyfriend so I felt as long as there was another guy around we would be OK - and that as the landlady had not supported me with aggressive first guy and was not going to do anything about camera guy, I didn't know what I could do.
So, landlady now has a new commitment. Camera guy moved out in December. The irrational lady got worse, two new people move in and all seems fine until living room sage.
Why have I stayed. When this started I went to the dr with some simple problems that have turned out to need complete examination with several consultants. For one year I was on bed rest exercises. I have broken my hip and am huge amounts of pain and on lots of medicine. I did not know what was the best thing to do as I am getting a lot of support from the dr and local physio hospital plus the central London hospitals and really felt so weak I couldn't do much. I am getting things in shape now but deep down, feel like my head is wrecked.
It is a bizarre situation to be in and I can't help but feel the landlady should appoint a management company to sort these things out. She relies on me to smooth things over but has been no support when it is crucial so I have backed back. If there is a problem in the house I always say to take it to her and try not to get too engaged as I am emotionally wraught out.
Thank you if you have followed this far. I know it is convoluted and probably doesn't make sense. I have such panic attacks and am so frustrated that it feels as though I don't warrant support or to be treated with respect.