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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think my child should be guaranteed a place in beavers?

194 replies

TheQueenInTheNorth · 03/01/2020 21:31

I'm a cub leader at our local scout group and have children already spread out amongst the sections. My youngest is finally old enough to join her sibling in beavers which has been talked about by other leaders and assumed she would be starting as soon as she was of age, she has even taken part with beavers with me as I've had childcare issues. Other times I've had her with me in cubs and as she has special needs, she's been a handful with being bored in an older age group, which has made it more difficult for me in my role as a leader. I have now been told that there in no space for her in the beaver group and I can't help thinking that she should have already been on a waiting list and should have a slight advantage with her siblings being part of the group and her mother being a leader

OP posts:
MeanMrMustardSeed · 03/01/2020 21:32

I completely agree with you.

Embracelife · 03/01/2020 21:32

Did you put her on the wait list?
If not then why not ?

SpeedofaSloth · 03/01/2020 21:33

Did you put her name on the waiting list, OP?

SquashedFlyBiscuit · 03/01/2020 21:33

Well was she on the waiting list?

SleepWarrior · 03/01/2020 21:33

I thought being a leader was a way of getting a place? I was told my local one was full and had a waiting list, unless I wanted to volunteer so my DC could get in...

Oblomov20 · 03/01/2020 21:33

Eh?
Only if you put her name on the waiting list!

IdiotInDisguise · 03/01/2020 21:33

Did you put her in the waiting list?

To be honest, I would be a bit peeved as well, in fact, I would be tempted to step down as a leader if they cannot find her a place.

TooDamnSarky · 03/01/2020 21:34

Our group gives priority to leader's kids but you'd still have to have put her on the list. If you hadn't put her on the list then she would go on the top of the list now now and get the next place to become available.

JosefKeller · 03/01/2020 21:34

Yes, she should have a place but you should have been a bit more proactive and check that she had.

VimFuego101 · 03/01/2020 21:34

Assuming she was actually on the waiting list, then yes, I think leaders children should get priority to allow the leaders to continue to volunteer.

EsmeeMerlin · 03/01/2020 21:35

Well did you put her on the list?

Chocolatecake12 · 03/01/2020 21:36

As a leader I agree that your child should automatically get a place. Seems a no brainer to me.

Icanflyhigh · 03/01/2020 21:36

Has to be on the waiting list around here, even if parent is a leader

TokyoSushi · 03/01/2020 21:37

Well yes, but did you put her on the waiting list?

midnightmisssuki · 03/01/2020 21:38

was she on the wait list? or did you assume?

Original poster
TheQueenInTheNorth · 03/01/2020 21:38

I thought her name was on the waiting list, when I had spoke to beaver leaders before and asked when she could join they said January. The gsl even let her take part in beaver sessions with me to ease her in as she was bored in Cubs with me

OP posts:
QuillBill · 03/01/2020 21:39

I do t think it makes a difference if she was on a waiting list or not really. It was obvious and common knowledge that your dd would want a place when she was old enough. It's a bit jobsworth to say 'she's not officially on the list so she can't have a place'.

IAmNotAWitch · 03/01/2020 21:41

Shrug. In that situation I would just walk if she didn't have a place. Simple.

WaterSheep · 03/01/2020 21:41

Being a leader usually jumps a child up the list, but if you didn't put her on the waiting list then of course she won't get a place. Imagine if they'd kept a place open for her, which stopped another child from joining, but she had no interest in attending.

Original poster
TheQueenInTheNorth · 03/01/2020 21:41

This is the first time our group has actually had a waiting list as it was always a pretty small group, my other children got a place straight away and the beaver leaders and gsl didn't say she needed to be on the waiting list when I spoke to them about her joining

OP posts:
Rosebel · 03/01/2020 21:42

If you didn't put her on the waiting list you can't complain but it does sound like there's been miscommunication somewhere.

NailsNeedDoing · 03/01/2020 21:42

I don’t think being a sibling should get her priority, but you being a leader definitely should! That’s how it works at our group, and rightly so considering how much our volunteer leaders do.

Could it be that they’re genuinely at capacity for official members of the group at the moment, and as soon as a space becomes available, now that your dad is the right age, the place will go to her? I could understand if they can’t officially accept her right now if it will take them over their numbers.

Fallenmadonnawiththebigboobies · 03/01/2020 21:43

I think if you volunteer then your child should get a place automatically. Without volunteer leaders there would be no Beaver/Cub/Scout places at all! I'm really grateful to the people who give their time and energy so my DD can attend Cubs.

MorbidMuch · 03/01/2020 21:43

Did they say when a space would be likely to become available? YANBU to expect the children of leaders to have priority, but only if there is an available space at the right time.

If you think that there is something underhand at work (which I would hope not as that goes against the ethos of Scouting), then can you have a chat with your district commissioner (or equivalent - I'm a Guider so not sure if you have different names) for their advice / support?

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 03/01/2020 21:44

That’s a pain in the arse. Is there some sort of statutory limit that stops them having her?