Have you ever had negative comments for dressing well going to work?

[Shedidnt]

I suppose they were not negative in my case but I don't have much confidence really, so I think women (in both cases) wouldn't know that.

I dress well going to work. Pencil skirts or dresses. On two occasions how I dress has been commented on (and not complimentary).

First one was a girl who said 'you look like you're dressed up to go out - I wouldn't get dressed up to come into this place'. I felt like an eejit for trying too hard.

Second one were two female colleagues talking among themselves and one saying 'oh well, she's always overdressed'.

I like to dress well as it gives me confidence. But I feel women particularly hated me for it. The women I befriended never commented apart from maybe to say, that's a nice top - where did you get it (usually primark), but it has left me feeling self conscious about what I wear in case I look like a try-hard or something?

Please tell me some of you dress up to go to work?

Another factor might be an ex (who used to beat me up) told me I was dressing up for the men at work and in fact some of the beatings I took were to make my face bruised so that I couldn't go to work.

She'd say things like "another new top" ....god how many clothes have you got?"
...look so and so (another colleague) have you seen tan, another new dress/top, so many clothes that one" etc etc etc. Every bastard day.

Yup. Have had it all.

I know what you mean, I work in a place that used to have a business casual policy and has since changed to casual so we can wear whatever we like.

Some days I wear jeans and a plain top, no make-up and hair just in a ponytail. Other days I like to wear nicer, smart clothes, have my hair nice and sometimes a bit of make-up. I normally feel better and more confident when I'm dressed well. I've lost a lot of weight this past year so for me part of it is the novelty of wearing stuff I never usually would have considered.

If you are comfortable in what you wear and you feel good, keep doing what you're doing and try to ignore any comments other people make.

what you want to project is subtle elegance.

No - actually.

What I want to project is that I'm 100% professional with a wild side that I tame between the hours of 9 and 5.

How do male PAs dress? In my workplace they wear skinny jeans, trainers and shirts!
I am shocked unless they're in media advertising or IT. A male PA I assumed would wear a 3 piece or smart trousers with a tie to work.

I'm curious as to how the others are evaluated regarding dress code.

If they conform to the official dress code, but are evaluated poorly compared to you (is this the case?), would you say that's fair or not?

I'd rather die than wear coloured tights ffs. Have you no taste?

How to lose friends in one post.

I like to dress well for work too. I really enjoy taking half an hour to myself each morning to put my make up on. I do it whilst DS is asleep and DP at work. It sets my day up and like you OP gives me confidence. And I have had lots of comments that are negative but also lots that are positive too.

I think of you enjoy it, if it helps you you need to carry on regardless of the comments. Most will be coming from jealously.

Yes I’ve had comments liek you look very/too glam for this time of the morning in the school run before

As I said, I think the dress code is probably introduced for the engineers - I'm not sure whether it encompasses wearing of PPE gear, but some of the engineers would probably dress down more than most and maybe that's the reason it was introduced. This company prides itself on being elite in what it does, so I am presuming they're expecting at least trousers and shirts from everyone male.

What I want to project is that I'm 100% professional
You can't project this with your outfits compared to jeans. They are unrelated.

with a wild side that I tame between the hours of 9 and 5.
Why would you want to project this at work?

What I want to project is that I'm 100% professional with a wild side that I tame between the hours of 9 and 5

Then try and make the wild side as unrelated to sex as you can.
In all seriousness, have you had counselling for DV?

Lweji - you're worse than the other one. What's with the obsession?

FFS - I'm wild outside work - I obviously tame that wild side at work, but it comes out in my shoes. I still dress professionally.

Then try and make the wild side as unrelated to sex as you can

What in all that's green on this earth have I said that's related to sex?

Lovely outfits! Keep on wearing them ! I am assuming you don't work on a farm or on a building site though, in which case your colleagues may have a point!

I've posted two photos of what I typically wear. Why two of you think this relates to sex I have no idea.

Well, depends on the workplace. You can be overdressed. You will look like an eejit if you turn up at my work wearing a pencil skirt. A dress if fine if it's casual. It's just really casual and people sit at their desk in cycling gear and trainers and jeans. You just don't fit in if you wear pencil skirts. You can dress well casually too, you know.

I think you are being rather rude. FFS isn't professional and neither is I'd rather die than wear coloured tights - have you no taste. That is your opinion and if you don't want the honest opinions of others your own need to be toned down.

I think you are also mixing up dressing up with well groomed or classy. Personally I think a pair of Ferragamo pumps are far more stylish than gold high heels from the High Street but only those who know would be aware and everyone else would think they were appropriate and unremarkable. I suppose it depends who you wish to make an impression on.

‘Now learn from your mother or else spend your days biting your own neck‘ comes to mind.
We’re trying to be supportive. I’ve got a daughter of my own. There is no malice in my posts.

By the way, I've seen the pictures, but I haven't seen your colleagues. That's way overdressed in my work place.

Slight price difference between Ferragamo pumps and shoes from new look to be fair

Generalising but on mn unless specifically on the S&B board I do think there is a lot of judgement about women who spend money on their appearance. Each to their own really.

OP looks perfectly nicely dressed. I used to work in a very casual environment but would wear whatever I wanted, so sometimes a smart dress if I felt like it.

Where I work people dress casually (hoodies, jeans, etc). If someone does come in dressing smartly the instant response is "Have you got an interview?" (meant as a joke). Its just office culture but I can see how it could be taken negatively. In summer I do dress a bit more smartly. Just the way things are in offices. Not a lot you can do really, just try not to let it get to you. ¯\(ツ)/¯

Oh bollocks! I don't even know what Ferragamo pumps are! Nor do I want to know if they transform me into a pompous ass!

The thing I have in addition to good taste honey is tact!

OneStepSideways, I'd rather die than wear coloured tights ffs. Have you no taste?

You sound rather judgemental and rude about other women’s clothes OP. Coloured tights are popular these days especially amongst the younger generation. Lots of young women wear coloured tights in my workplace eg mustard tights with a navy dress, or teal tights with a black dress. Snag tights are all the rage and come in all colours! I don’t think they lack taste.

On the other hand, wearing statement red heels with a corporate style dress looks OTT for a PA. Likewise, silver heels with a black asymmetric pencil skirt and top could be described as lacking taste. Work isn’t about ‘hinting at your wild side’ but dressing appropriately and professionally. Statement heels and nude tights scream ‘look at me’ unless you work a in a department where it’s the norm for PAs to dress like that.

The thing I have in addition to good taste honey is tact!

😂😂😂