Mil makes dh his tea

[legolegolegolego]

Looking for some opinions on this and whether it’s a bit...well...weird or not! DH works shifts, finishing at 8pm. He’s in the habit of stopping by his mums on the way home from work where she gives him his tea. He then brings it home with him. Many times I’ve plated up a dinner for dh and he’s eaten his mums instead. Today I cooked a roast dinner (dc and I ate earlier) it was all plated ready and again he’s come home with a big plate of food from his mums. Aibu to feel like I needn’t have bothered? Should I be happy that she’s cooking his tea and I don’t have to? It just feels odd to me and I cant imagine going to my mums everyday for my tea at my age!

Definitely stop cooking for him. Just cook for yourself and the children, clear away and continue whatever you do with the DC during the evening.

My lovely MIL too @Elbeagle, xMIL would have nipped out for burgers.

Next time he wants sex, have a strop about how small his dick is and tell him he's "forcing you" to go elsewhere for a shag because he can't satisfy you.

You got yourself a big man baby. Stop feeding him. His mummy can do it or he can do it himself, unless he has no hands.

I would stop.making his dinners, if he wants his mum to fees him.

Does he pop in because she's lonely? I'd think about saying, next time you pop to your mums after work tell her no need to cook for me, I've got a dinner waiting for me at home

Tell him to take the plates back your house isnt a charity shop

If he was a single bloke I'd say it's very nice and sweet if a little imbecilic but as you're already cooking for him I'd find it very rude. If you've made tea he needs to freeze his mums portion or take it for lunch the next day.

Childish

"You don't feed her son" can her son feed himself for fuck sake. I'm sorry I'd be mortified if I was him, is he 3 years old? Does mummy cut it up and feed it to him too?

I'd tell him this weird arrangement ought to stop immediately, he's a big boy with a family now he can't be stopping by mummy's for a strop because his burgers aren't the right size , bless his little cotton socks.

Put your feet up and ask what he's making you and the kids for dinner tomorrow.

He sounds like the type to have a moan about you to his mum for some tea and sympathy.

It's the rudeness that would piss me off, assuming you'll always cook something nice for him and have it ready in case he graces you with the joy of him actually eating it.

Frame it to him in a practical way if he'll be a dick about the emotional side of it. He needs to let you know by xx a day of hell be eating at his mums or at home because you are spending money on food that doesn't need to be bought.

Sorry OP I think he's probably making himself out to be super burdened to his mum so she feels sorry for him, it might not be all down to her. In fact I doubt it is!

He also needs to take some of her bloody plates back

Oh he's horrible Op.

Crying to mummy about a meal that he thought was sub par.

Urgh. Why on earth are you still cooking for him after he was so rude to you? Why couldn't he have cooked himself another burger / other thing?

He finishes work at 8pm and gets home when? You must barely see him. is that what he's aiming for? What time do the DCs go to bed? Does he see them, spend any quality time with them, during the week?

I’d stop making him dinner and just say that you aren’t cooking for him when he brings dinners home from his mums. He’ll strop but I’m sure he’ll start communicating better

You are in a triangle with MIL. I had the same with my MIL but luckily we lived hundreds of miles away. You have a DH problem and his mum is obviously perfectly happy to undermine you.

Why does your ?DHAKA let this happen? He needs to say no! Has he said anything to her about this?

The creepiest is when the MIL treats her son like her husband and believes she provides everything, but reluctantly admits that the wife provides sex and grandkids but otherwise her son is still hers.

But the problem is HIS now not his mum.

If he won’t cook for himself, has an issue with the size of burgers you cook and is being a twat then I’d let him mum feed him. I wouldn’t do any meals at all for him now. Why bother?

Give all her plates to the charity shop!

How bizarre. Have you never challenged him when he keeps coming home with food? Leave out all her plates and say to him right tomorrow take them back.

If it's happening all the time, stop making his tea and tell him you'll resume cooking for him when he lets you know he'll actually be eating at home. I can't see this as your MIL's fault. Her son is turning up on her doorstep claiming to be hungry - why wouldn't she feed him? He's rather rude about your food so I don't know why you want to cook for him anyway.

Wow really unattractive that he is running to mummy and telling tales

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best response.

Scissors. Apron strings.

How bizarre.