£100 for xmas dinner

[disneydatknee]

We went to sis inlayws for xmas dinner this year and shes charging £100 per family. No alcohol was provided, we had to bring our own. Pud was brought by another family member. All her veg was free from a local charity for food waste. So she only paid for meat which I ate about half a palmful of beef of. My family consists of 2 adults and 2 children that ate fuck all. Aibu to say I'm not fucking paying it? No back story or drip feed. This is it!

So just to be clear this is £25 each ...family of four £100, Yes it does seem a bit much but if they are getting free veg from a local charity it sounds like they are quite hard up. Beef is expensive...How do the rest of your family feel about it, are they paying....

Did she advise You by WhatsApp the amount after you had been There or before you went? If has gone down to 50.0 what are other famil members doing? I bought and took food to my mils caravan where she had taken the children for a week,! didn’t expect any money back, I was told I was weird for taking food down to them but I was just helping out as it can be expensive for a weeks food! Apparently I was BU as well..😄

If you can't afford it don't host Christmas dinner! No calculations, this is taking mean/greed to another level. I have never in my life heard of something so despicable. Was part of the charge for your Christmas present? What a terrible idea charging family and friends for Christmas dinner so sad.

@Choccylips

Your post is plain stupid. My uncle always hosted Xmas dinner because his house was most conveniently located and he was the only one who had enough space. He wouldn't have been able to afford to cover the costs though and why should he year after year? It's totally reasonable for everyone to contribute. It's unreasonable to charge more than the meal cost and up the price without warning though!

@wowfudge
The original fee was £50. The sil then decided after to up it to £100.

@Choccylips. That is a horrible post. First time I have ever reported a post.

And maybe she had underestimated the cost. Who knows. Only pay what was agreed beforehand then.

I host a lot throughout the year for at least 10.
I’ve never charged a penny nor have friends.
We all take a dish and a drink. Everything properly organised and we know who is doing what.
Friends who are travelling get their ingredients on the way of their thing doesn’t travel.

We did think about all chipping in and do it that way, but not really fair on the host to do everything.

@wowfudge
The veg was free
The dessert provided by someone else
The host only bought the turkey.

You've never heard of anything so despicable Choccylips? Try reading your next post. Vile.

@choccylips
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Attention seeking or what!
& why does "uncle" = "old man"?
🤔🙄

@ffswhatnext - will you please stop bloody tagging me. I can read and I stand by my posts.

& fwiw my opinion is all families / friends have free choice to decide what works best for them, whether it be all chipping in (either cash or bringing food) or just hosting for everything. What I find unreasonable though is doubling the agreed amount with no explanation. From what OP has said it does seem like the SIL is just making money out of her relatives, which is totally unreasonable.

You are obviously a friend of hardofcleaning she tells me my post is stupid! not as stupid as hers or the hidden undertones in what she says it's definitely bit her arse.

Choccylips - you sound nice!

Ridiculous post IMO, no one has said people with small houses shouldn't host but not sure how you can physically fit 10-15 in a tiny lounge or dining room. Presumably in the situations quoted on here the person with the biggest house offers to ensure the family can all get together.

Of course people with small homes can’t host large numbers of people! The max I can fit around my dining table would be a VERY cosy 10 and four of them would have to bring their own chairs!

My aunt and uncle always provided the venue for the extended family over Christmas (not Christmas Day) because they had a large house and all 20+ could sit in one room quite comfortably. We all took food and drink though. No one wanted an inheritance and only their children (quite rightly) got one!

To call someone a cretin for having a different opinion to you is disgusting.

Treat this situation like a proffesional business transaction.
Do not let her screw you for 100 quid when it's clearly outrageous. If she wins this your life will be made a misery by her in future. Stand now for your self respect in the future.

Pay £50 you need no excuses or explanation to what clearly is cheeky hardfaced behaviour.
Do it with no emotion. Be cool and polite. Don't lose your temper or anythink like that. Keeping your cool keeps you in charge.

You were told beforehand £50 with alcohol and didn't get any alcohol. Thats her weak spot. Cling to that firmly but politely. Its your get out clause.
Ignore any re calculations.

Good luck.
This is about power and control and likely jealousy. Let her see you and your hubby are a strong unit who won't be suffering injustice.

choccylips what a delight you are

You made the Daily Fail op, better hope there is more than one sis in law in your family

The poor sister In law is she oblivious of it all? 😄

disneydatknee Any further developments op?

I have started putting £100 in my mums account as a small contribution towards Christmas. She would never ask, and I don't know if my siblings do too, but we always go home for Christmas, 3 siblings, all our kids, spouses and all the dogs. As I did it this year I wondered if that's enough when it costs us ~£70 to go out for pizza as a family of 5.

I don't get this 'trend' for charging people to come to your house to eat. It's a house, not a restaurant. To me, it's outrageous. If you can't afford to feed people, then don't host. It's perfectly acceptable though to ask people to contribute with food, say one brings the veggies, one brings the pudding, another - something to drink and so on. But OP this just sounds like a CF money making scheme to me.

I don't think it's a trend - it's just what some people choose to do. We've each put £25 into the pot for a big dinner party before now. With things like online shopping and banking apps it's often easier for one person to act as the food purchaser and everyone else to give them cash/make a bank transfer.