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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Cyprus is no longer a safe place for (young, single) women to holiday?

725 replies

Kraai · 30/12/2019 11:57

The teen went back to her ONS's room for consensual sex. When there, 11 of his mates burst in and filmed while three of them then raped her. She went to the police and reported it. They were detained. They said it was consensual and was "with love" (I kid you not!). She was interviewed at length with no legal representation and the police decided she was lying. She was then charged with the crime of making up a crime and has been unable to come home since the summer. The guys were all allowed to return to Israel where some of them have since said things indicating she wasn't lying at all and I'm pretty sure the video was shared (from memory, which may be wrong). She's had psychological evaluation saying she's suffering badly from PTSD.

It's worth noting that the Cyprus is a very popular destination for young Israelis to let off steam before they start national service and there's a strong political tie between the two.

So, AIBU to say that Cyprus is no longer a safe destination for young woman? If the worst happens to you and you report it and the police think you're not a credible witness, YOU will end up in jail. Knowing how traumatic reporting something like a stolen wallet in a foreign police station can be, the idea that a woman would be interviewed without legal representation in a state of severe distress, however that manifests, and then not believed and charged means that men have been given free rein to rape in Cyprus. Especially if it's in a potential "grey zone".

https://www.bbc.com/news/videoandd_audio/headlines/50944483/cyprus-rape-claim-case-it-s-a-very-worrying-conviction

OP posts:
FrogsFrogs · 04/01/2020 18:09

And what relevance does it have to the case in question?

What is your view on what happened.

FrogsFrogs · 04/01/2020 18:11

Why are you making it all about you and your choices and how (hopefully) safe they will make you?

You can live your whole life hiding in the shadows and shit can still happen.

I'm really not sure what point you think you're making. You are confident you won't be victim to a sex crime. Good for you! Some people think of others as well though.

PhoneLock · 04/01/2020 18:12

And what relevance does it have to the case in question?

What's it ?

What is your view on what happened.

That she shouldn't have been prosecuted, given the circumstances.

FrogsFrogs · 04/01/2020 18:13

What relevance does your assessment of your likelihood of being a victim of a sex crime have to the case in question?

PhoneLock · 04/01/2020 18:14

Why are you making it all about you and your choices and how (hopefully) safe they will make you?

Are you for real? Perhaps RTFT.

Somebody asked me a direct question I answered, then you jumped in with both feet, presumably without bothering to check the context of my post.

PhoneLock · 04/01/2020 18:15

What relevance does your assessment of your likelihood of being a victim of a sex crime have to the case in question?

See my post above. RTFT!

FrogsFrogs · 04/01/2020 18:16

What do you think should have happened in this case past her not being prosecuted?

FrogsFrogs · 04/01/2020 18:17

Why do you want to visit a country that you believe wrongly prosecuted in this situation?

You're supporting them with your cash. That's quite a big statement.

PhoneLock · 04/01/2020 18:19

What do you think should have happened in this case past her not being prosecuted?

Can you be more vague?

PhoneLock · 04/01/2020 18:22

Why do you want to visit a country that you believe wrongly prosecuted in this situation?

If I boycotted every country that had questionable prosecutions, I wouldn't even able to book a week in Scunthorpe with a clear conscience?

Where do you go on holiday?

PhoneLock · 04/01/2020 18:22

be able

PhoneLock · 04/01/2020 18:24

Also no question mark at the end of the first sentence.

FrogsFrogs · 04/01/2020 18:27

'What do you think should have happened in this case past her not being prosecuted?

Can you be more vague?'

It's a straightforward question. You don't think she should have been prosecuted. What do you think should have happened?

Italiangreyhound · 04/01/2020 18:31

Phonelock I don't think you were saying what people have extrapolated from your comments but I do think you are wrong to assume being with a trusted male means you are safe.

I know women and girls can be at risk in all kinds of situations. What makes this situation so scary is the fact the law was used against a victim of crime to further victimize her. Really, really scary.

Italiangreyhound · 04/01/2020 18:33

And, yes, I did ask Phonelock a direct question about her safety. So it's not fair to jump on her when she answers it!

PhoneLock · 04/01/2020 18:41

Phonelock I don't think you were saying what people have extrapolated from your comments but I do think you are wrong to assume being with a trusted male means you are safe.

Yes, I know that... but a lot safer than without.

Do you disagree?

PhoneLock · 04/01/2020 18:47

It's a straightforward question. You don't think she should have been prosecuted. What do you think should have happened?

It isn't that straightforward because I haven't got full access to all of the facts. All I know is what I have read in the papers. I do think the case (not her prosecution) should be reviewed.

PhoneLock · 04/01/2020 18:48

not just her prosecution

Italiangreyhound · 05/01/2020 02:19

PhoneLock "Yes, I know that... but a lot safer than without.

Do you disagree?"

Yes, I feel safer when my dh is around but I know a lot of women do not have partners they can trust too.

PhoneLock · 05/01/2020 06:05

Yes, I feel safer when my dh is around but I know a lot of women do not have partners they can trust too

Thankfully, I am not one them.

Italiangreyhound · 05/01/2020 15:36

PhoneLock scary as the lack of safety is here, the biggest issue here IMHO in relation to this case, is that the victim has ended up in prison. Having a trusted male partner will not keep one 'safe' from an unjust system of law. That's the point here.

Italiangreyhound · 05/01/2020 15:36

Anyone else going on the march tomorrow?

PhoneLock · 05/01/2020 16:45

Having a trusted male partner will not keep one 'safe' from an unjust system of law.

I'm not sure how you come to that conclusion. If there is no rape in the first place, one is very safe from an unjust system of law. One might not agree with it, but it is no direct threat.

MissEliza · 05/01/2020 18:11

So if a woman has a partner, she's safe from the threat of rape? Seriously?

PhoneLock · 05/01/2020 18:49

So if a woman has a partner, she's safe from the threat of rape? Seriously?

This is like Groundhog Day.

Do me a favour dear... RTFT.

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