Since having our own home, we generally host Christmas for whatever extended family do not have other plans.
We wouldn’t expect contributions to the food for the main meal, and in fact, I actually find it less stressful to not have other people clogging up the kitchen. Also, I’ve found that offers to bring things are not reliable, so you either end upward too much, nothing, or at a point in the day that throws your prep timings off! Less stressful and more predictable to buy yourself.
What is more helpful for me (and indeed is a a Godsend) is if anyone is happy to wash the roasting tins afterwards, or empty the dishwasher in between loads, or to keep people topped up with drinks/snacks so I am free to continue prepping and serving dinner or I can put my feet up afterwards.
What happened when I was younger, was that my Mum and her two sisters took turns to host Christmas. No contributions required from anyone. Someone else would host Boxing Day. Over a few years it just evened out.
We’ve sort of taken on the mantle of Christmas by default. We don’t mind the expense. We can afford it, and it is the best way to facilitate getting the whole family together. We always had crazy Christmases when I was a child with the whole extended family plus various friends with no place to go. The ‘core’ family (siblings and cousins) love music, and we always ended up singing round the piano. It was one of the few times in the year that we could sing things in multiple parts, as we had enough people. Even people who said they were ‘non-singers’ were often drawn into the fun.
That’s Christmas for me. We have one child, and will not be able to have another. My brother and my sister have emigrated abroad, as have two cousins. The ones remaining in the country now have family of their own, and are rightly building their own traditions. The generation above are not getting any younger. I am going to have to get used to quieter Christmases, so taking the opportunity to indulge in crazy big gatherings whilst we still can.