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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it's weird that she used the family bathroom?

345 replies

FairfaxAikman · 28/12/2019 12:59

Friend of mine visited the house yesterday.

She's been here before and knows we have a downstairs guest loo but yesterday when she asked to use the loo she went upstairs to the main bathroom (which was in a bit of a mess as wasn't expecting anyone to see it)
To do so she had to navigate two baby gates, so it's not like it's the easier option.

AIBU to think it's weird?

OP posts:
harper30 · 29/12/2019 21:45

Why is OP so pissy about someone seeing her messy bathroom? I couldn't give a crap if someone went upstairs in my house, it's definitely not an 'unwritten rule' that people shouldn't go upstairs in other peoples houses?
Was going to try to work in more toilet puns but can't be arsed.

Cohle · 29/12/2019 21:49

What do you do if you're staying with a friend or relative for days?

Become unbelievably constipated? Or is that different? If so, how long does a visit have to be before it's long enough to permit a poo?

OneForMeToo · 29/12/2019 21:50

I don’t mind people pooing in my toilet. Just use the guest toilet downstairs as I don’t want to hear your splosh from above my head from doing it in the family bathroom.

Kizzyma · 29/12/2019 21:56

@Elbeagle If I really couldn’t wait it would be because I was ill so would just say that and leave. I suppose I’m just lucky as I don’t get the ‘if you’ve got to go you’ve got to go’. I can hold it - it wouldn’t bother me as much as actually going somewhere else I suppose. I do understand by reading the comments that it’s obviously my problem. Everyone else seems to think it’s ok but me . I just can’t get past anyone not being embarrassed plopping away with people in the next cubicle or making people feel ill with the smell.

Elbeagle · 29/12/2019 21:58

Well rest assured I’ve never been embarrassed by what is essentially biology.

SlightlyStaleCocoPops · 29/12/2019 22:01

"making people feel ill with the smell."

If it smells this bad when you go to the toilet, you should be seeing a doctor.

eveshopper · 29/12/2019 22:13

. I just can’t get past anyone not being embarrassed plopping away with people in the next cubicle or making people feel ill with the smell.

That really is your problem though.

Kizzyma · 29/12/2019 22:21

@SlightlyStaleCocoPops I don’t think
I’m ill - I just find everyone’s poo smell disgusting but agree no one else seems to here so it must be me
@eveshopper the vast majority here agree with you

reallyrandomwords · 29/12/2019 22:27

Wow, people are weird...

Merryweather80 · 29/12/2019 22:48

@Kizzyma I completely agree with you. Can't stand to smell other people's waste. 🤮

Kizzyma · 29/12/2019 22:51

@Merryweather80 finally !!

gamerchick · 29/12/2019 22:55

but agree no one else seems to here so it must be me

No, there's a couple of other odd thoughts on this thread.

We all shit, shit smells. It's easy to limit the smell. Shit quick, close lid and flush. Then open lid again, sit down and wipe. It's not hard.

PopcornAndWine · 29/12/2019 23:15

I don't think anyone here is saying they think shit smells nice. It's just that unless you only ever use a toilet that you have sole use of, you will occasionally smell other people's. Just part of life. Hold your breath and get on with it!

UnRavellingFast · 29/12/2019 23:24

How about some compassion. Do those of you moaning about other ppl not having the amazing control you say you have, understand we’re not all the same? One day this could be you or someone you love, (I hope not btw but speak from experience) having a serious disease and not wanting the humiliation of everyone downstairs getting to share in it?! How small-minded and seriously dim-witted are some of these comments. Actually it’s cruel. How fucking depressing that this is what you’re worried about when the world’s burning.

Knittingsavesme · 29/12/2019 23:29

I wouldn’t dream of going upstairs if there was a downstairs loo. I too was brought up to think that upstairs is private and ‘out of bounds’ unless there was good reason to go up there. Different, of course, if you’re staying overnight.

I don’t think I’ve ever had anyone just nip upstairs in my house, when they can use the downstairs loo.

LeSquigh · 29/12/2019 23:35

@Sparklewater Yes - if I get to work and need a poo after half an hour I will wait the nearly 12 hours it takes me to finish work and get home. I could not bring myself to poo at work!

LeSquigh · 29/12/2019 23:38

I also hate when other people poo in my house. When my ILs babysit and one of them has a poo in my house before I get home it is really not what I want to come home to smelling!

UnRavellingFast · 29/12/2019 23:41

@LeSquigh I hope you don’t develop a miserable disease like my family member. You would have to self loathe and feel desperately embarrassed as well as having a life threatening and painful medical condition. But it’s ok if you’re ill- so should she announce her condition before using the facilities ?

SlightlyStaleCocoPops · 29/12/2019 23:56

No one is saying that human waste smells nice, but if yours either smells so bad or you're so sensitive to normal smells that you can't go into a toilet without being sick, then you're the one with the problem.

BlueCornsihPixie · 30/12/2019 00:01

Can you imagine a friend comes round for dinner

You spend all day cleaning and preparing a meal. 10 minutes in your friend says "sorry mate I've got to go, I need to go home for a poo"

Just shit in my loo ffs. It's not like I won't clean it, I'm not licking the toilet bowl.

Id be really pissed off if a friend left early because they needed a shit, there's flaky and then there's that!

I always wonder who mnetters have as guests. Anyone who comes into my house is either a friend or family member, I have no problem with them going upstairs, in my kitchen, they can even do a poo!

BlueCornsihPixie · 30/12/2019 00:04

I actually feel a bit sad that one of my friends might be sat there all uncomfortable because they are too scared to poo in my house

I might put a sign on my toilet saying strange poos welcome Grin

Jonb6 · 30/12/2019 00:07

Allowing pooing in kitchens may be going too far . . .

ALLMYSmellySocks · 30/12/2019 00:23

I completely agree with you. Can't stand to smell other people's waste.

Then surely you should be the one avoiding the toilet not the people using it for its intended purpose?

FaveNumberIs2 · 30/12/2019 00:58

Maybe she doesn’t have a second loo and is used to going upstairs on autopilot?

Kizzyma · 30/12/2019 08:42

@LeSquigh 👏👏👏👏

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