He used the phrase the girls to describe two adult women.

[cherryblossomgin]

Christmas was great but something stuck out to me, at the time I said nothing but it annoyed me and Its still annoying me. DS BF called me and DS the girls and the moment he said it I internally cringed and wanted to say something but I didn't. I'm 31 she is 30. AIBU to be bothered by this. I know its not a major issue and overall he is nice guy.

You did refer to your sister's partner as BOYfriend

Reminds me of a thread years ago where the OP was upset because someone called her baby son "little man".

I hope you logged this puberty-shaming with 101

❄

The term is only offensive if it's used in a derogatory or offensive manner.

Splitting up children into girls/boys for different activities sends the wrong message. As does "colouring books for girls" (with ponies and princesses) or "cookery books for boys" … but referring to a group of adult friends as the boys or the girls doesn't.

I'd be over the moon with this.

My GIRLfriends and I are all around our 50s and we refer to ourselves as the girls... or bitches....

I refer to husband and sons collectively as "the boys".

Total non issue for me.

It’s really a non issue

I'm very radfem. Don't mind being referred to as "the girls" (me and my partner) at all.

Get a life.

❄️

At home - wouldn't be bothered. My friends and I refer to ourselves as "The Girls" Our husbands are "The Boys". We go on girls/boys weekends, girls/boys nights out, its easy, everyone understands what is meant when you say I'm going out with the girls/boys.

However, I would be disappointed to be referred to as a "girl" in a professional setting, nor would I use the term to refer to a colleague.

If you are uncomfortable with the terminology he has used then you can address it. Be prepared for it not to be taken in a positive way though.

@echt I got to page 9 of this thread without seeing any outrage over your casual slur/ insinuation of misogyny against an entire nation which is equally perpetuating outdated, inaccurate stereotypes that are equally (and rightfully) as likely to cause offence. Check yourself and your attitudes before you wield the baton for the sisterhood on my behalf, thanks. Yes I am Australian. And yes, you are being ridiculous.

Language is all about context and intent of both the issuer and their audience. Common parlance shows that the vast majority of women use this as a term of endearment which overrides the literal meaning and any study of language will reveal endless examples of the same.

Eh?
Am i missing something. Some called you and other women the girls?
Whats wrong with that

I literally cant believe someone woukd have a issue with this

I don't like it at work. When men say 'I'll get the girls to do X for me' when they are fully grown women, and just because they are in support functions doesn't mean it's their job to do the admin work for men that they should be doing themselves.

This honestly wouldn't even register with me

What’s the problem 🤷‍♀️

The 'girls' in question grit their teeth, smile nicely, and do it. Because that's the way it goes, isn't it, if you're a women a support role.

One of them occasionally sends a pointed email round saying this is how you do it yourself.

Every time a bloke says oh the girls can do it I would I wince.

Still, pleased some women have literally m idea why this could even begin to be an issue. Problem solved! I'll tell them to embrace it.

Yeah, this does not seem like a problem to me.

Would it be better to use 'Women', Old Women, Old Birds, Near middle-aged women, Sweethearts, old girls, grannies, shelf hangers, past it women friends and so on? They will all be used in time so why not stick with girls that signifies, Youth, Smiles, Healthy, Fun, Attraction and Craziness in one simple word. You could pursue your outrage, however, as time passes you by, the term is a lot better than old prune, prude, witch/hag and you'll yearn to be called a girl once more.

Well yes I think saying ask the woman is fine or better still call them by their fucking names which you know perfectly well.

It's dismissive.

In what situation are you in where men routinely refer to women they know as 'hags'?

I wonder where the wine is?
Go and ask that gag over there (aka your sister Jane)

YY v common

Feminists really can't cope when women disagree with them.

Taking your replies on board. I probably just don't feel comfortable around him yet. For the people who asked, I like my sisters new bf, it's not me having an issue with him. As I've said IRL I don't bring these things up and wondered if I was just being over sensitive. I obviously I was.

Do men in your life routinely refer to women they know as hags?

I don't believe that.

I've certainly never heard it in the office

If you all want to hear men saying 'I'll get the girls trip do it' in the office when the 'girls' are middle aged, the men know their names, and it's the men's job to do it, then lovely for you. You can shut down any woman in the office who say they aren't keen on being referred to that way.