Boyfriend cheating.. just found out..

[Beebeezed]

Omg, I don’t know what to do. My boyfriend has gone out on a work do. I kept hearing a pinging coming from his office so I went in to mute whatever device it was and it was his iPad. Went to mute it and saw the message ‘can’t wait babe’ on the home screen. Obviously I opened it and have now found hundreds of messages between him and another girl. No idea who she is. Haven’t even looked into that yet. Just read the messages. He says he loves her. I have an 8 month old baby I feel sick please what shall I do from here? He’s just text me saying he misses me and I can see on the iPad he’s text her saying he misses her

I'm so sorry OP

I agree with others, collect all your important documents.

Pack a bag for you and baby and just get out of there and go to your mums if at all possible to work out your next move.

*agree with pp

Oh OP, you will be in shock right now. I'm so very sorry, let your mum comfort you and lean on her right now. Thinking of you 💐

Hugs op, to you and your mum.

Xmas is coming up, he can stay with family and friends. A good week for time out for both of you. Really, don't let him back into the house after tomorrow and don't leave it yourself at all costs. Tell everyone why he's away at the moment.

Unless you're fighting loudly, the baby won't know what's going on, and don't be fooled into thinking she will. Your best chance of repairing the relationship, ironically, is making a massive fuss so he sees what he's missing. Believe me, even if he ends up staying with GF he'll be trying to come back every day.

Let your Mum take care of you.

What an awful way to find out, small solace at least it's instantly been clear rather than nagging doubts.

Go to your mum’s, OP. Take essentials and the iPad. You can worry about everything else tomorrow. Let your mum look after you tonight.

Urgh what a prick. Don’t feel embarrassed OP, he’s disgusting. You and your baby deserve so much better. Glad you’ve got your Mum to look after you x

whatever else you do get the documents you will want together. If you have a shared bank account empty it or change the passwords so he cant easily access it.

You need time to decide what you want to do next, it will have been a terrible shock.

So sorry. Things will get better. Take care of you and your baby. X

Glad your mum is with you op xxx

I know what I'd do. I'd pack a bag, take the baby and go back to your Mum's, taking his iPad, and turning your mobile off. And I wouldn't leave a note

I think id do this, I think you really need to leave or inform him not to come home while he's drunk. Take the ipad and charger if you leave though x

So glad you have some real life support in your mum. It’s going to be shit for a time, but you’ll come through this stronger - good luck

You poor thing.What a dick. Let Mum take care of you

So sorry to hear this, I can't believe it's been going on so long but at least you have found out now.

Do not feel embarrassed. Do not feel ashamed. Do not feel guilt towards your baby. YOU have done nothing wrong! All you did was trust the man you loved.
HE is the ratbastard that brought a child into this knowing full well what he was getting up to behind your back. He is the one that has ruined everything
So very sorry you are having to go through this.

I'm so angry on your behalf! Nothing worse than a man who cheats when the woman is at her most vulnerable- pregnant or with a baby. It's a cliche but he doesn't deserve you!!! As someone else said you WILL be ok in time, probably better than ever before, but there will be difficult bits on the way.

I'd leave, go to your mums, no note and turn your phone off. Let him feel that sinking shock when he realises something is wrong and the house is empty. Then speak to him tomorrow when he's sober. So sorry.

Hes an arse. Like pp have said, photograph everything, keep checking. I know its painful but now you see him for what he is, he should feel embarrassed not you

Oh no, I am so sorry, what an ugly shock you have had. You must be spinning. Please just know that this is absolutely all on him. You have seen with your own eyes that he has betrayed you so I don't see any need for a confrontation - especially tonight if he has been drinking. I think it's unlikely that dumping a bag on the step or texting him telling him not to come home will work at all, he will probably try everything to get in and it could end up in a big scene at best, or incredibly nasty at worst. You shouldn't have to be the one to leave, no, but personally I wouldn't want to sleep in the bed we shared or look at his pants I washed on the drier. I also probably couldn't be trusted around his toothbrush.
A change of scene, if you can bear it, might be better. Your mum can help you with your baby while you can focus on moving forward from this arsehole. When you do inevitably meet/speak, you might be in a better place to be more business-like about the practicalities of the split.
You will be fine in time, of course you will, but let your mum look after you while you get over the shock. And you know what you've seen with your own eyes, don't listen to anything he says to try to make you doubt that.

Do not feel embarrassed. Do not feel ashamed. Do not feel guilt towards your baby. YOU have done nothing wrong! All you did was trust the man you loved.

This.

I’m sorry you have to deal with this op.

Op you have absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about. It is not a reflection on you. The audacity of the man contacting you both at the same time is incredible.

So glad your mum is with you x

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck.

You poor love. Eleven years and a baby, who could be so cruel.

Why can't these people leave if they are unhappy enough to cheat. Instead of all this shit that pulls the rug from underneath someone. I'm so sorry and I'm so glad your mum is there. Make sure you make a note of her number.

Take the iPad and if he might possibly twig then put it on airplane mode so you can capture the messages even if he deletes them.

Unfortunately I was in this position and realised it was quicker to video the view of scrolling through the messages rather than trying to take a million pictures.

Wish I could scoop you up, I've been there and the shock is unreal. Shaking like crazy I imagine.

Thank goodness your mum is with you

So awful. I really feel for you. Take care 💐