Hello all of you lovely people!!
I actually feel slightly embarrassed at how nice you’re all being to me. I don’t take compliments well in real life and clearly I don’t online either. 😂 your support has been so helpful to me. Thank you ❤️
@paulinespeaksmanylanguages that made me cry!! Thank you!!
Things are going well.
Ex has turned up to my parents a couple of times, he was becoming frustrated with my lack of contact towards him. He cried his eyes out when he saw my dad when he answered the door. He‘s seen my mum a few times as she is doing the handover with DS. He had a very good relationship with my family - he would often pop in and see my parents if he was passing even without me. The first time he turned up, I actually wasn’t in I but my dad told him how disappointed he is in him etc. I know this would have hurt my ex. He respects my dad very much. They play golf together, they’ve even been on a couple of stag do’s together!
The second time he turned up, I answered the door. DS was sleeping. He looks rough. He’s lost weight. Due to the times he’s turned up (middle of the day during the week) I don’t think he’s at work at the moment. His work only closes from 25th-26th December and then again New Year’s Day.
I asked him to leave and to respect my space. I said a lot about how this was all his doing, he should have thought about this before having sex with someone else. It was all very matter of fact, no shouting and... I DIDN’T CRY!! 😱 I was sooooo pleased that I didn’t give him that. I cried my eyes out as soon as I closed the door but I held it together before that, thank god!!
We are meeting next week to discuss the house going on the market and logistics with DS going forward. I know this sounds so lame and some of you may eye roll but we’re meeting Wednesday and I have booked into have a load of different beauty treatments on Tuesday 😂 I just want to look and feel my best, firstly for me to give me some confidence but yes, a huge part of me wants to make him realise what he’s missing. That may be pathetic, but hey.
Nothing more from OW. She’s blocked and I’ve deleted all social media, so she can’t get in contact with me.
Oh, all clean back from the sexual health clinic, thank goodness!
Every day I’m feeling a bit better. I’ve lost weight, (which I needed to lose), I’m seeing friends, I’m being busy with DS and I’m getting into a good routine. I think I’m going to stay at my parents for a year or so, even once the house sells to get a bit more money behind me and then buy a home for me and DS. Plus, my mum will be my source of childcare when I go back to work so it makes sense logistically.
Again, thank you. You have all helped me during the worst time of my life. I hope you all had a lovely Christmas and the best 2020 ☺️ Xxx