To ask your biggest parenting fails to make me feel better about mine today

[GlummyMcGlummerson]

I feel so guilty I could vomit. I’ve been sobbing all day (I know, I need to get a grip).

Taking DS (2) to nursery, as usual I put my handbag on the passenger seat of my car (which has the keyless entry and a stop/start button rather than an ignition) then strapped him in behind the passenger seat. Then, as usual, shut his door to walk round to the drivers’ side. This has never been an issue - it’s easier than keeping hold of my key in my hand while I strap a wriggling toddler into a car seat - but today for some reason the car locked itself. Long story short, the fire brigade had to come out and smash a window. DS has been in the car for about 20 minutes at his point and was seriously distressed. He’s fine now, but I’m a mess. I wouldn’t usually call emergency service BTW I did initially call the AA but they said up to 60 minutes and they couldn’t get hold of the nearest mechanic. There’s no way I was letting him stay there for so long.

I told my mum and she was horrified, told me to expect social services on my doorstep ready to take him away in the meantime I have ordered a spare key (at £235, thank god for Christmas bonus) and a new car window comes Friday (Merry arsing Christmas to me)

In the vain hope of me feeling less shit please regale me with anything similar you’ve done, please say it’s not just me!

@GunpowderGelatine Its ok to cry when you've had a shock! But you son is fine and as you can see from this thread, it happens!

LOL at you son telling the postman, hes going to live off that story for a while.

Social services aren’t going to give a flying feck about it, unless you locked him in panicked and went down the pub for a few gins before calling someone..

I dyed my 6lb newborn baby’s hair blue the day before the hv’s first check.. I had him in the sling while doing my hair (like from wet to dry not the dying) and the wet hair touching him was enough. Hats were our friend. Also fake tanned him a few months ago, he woke up in the small hours and I cuddled him in not thinking.. brown neck and cheek the next morning, the day before a wedding.. lots of baby oil actually got that off.

My DS locked himself in the car with the keys when he was 18 months old. I had to get my H to come home from work with the spare set. His mate gave him a lift as he cycled. It took around 25 minutes...

My toddler decided to chase after a dog and ran off the track into the woods, he was sprinting and I was loosing sight, in the panic I let go of my double off-roading buggy with 5 moth old DS in. Whilst retrieving toddler DS I didn't realise that baby DS had rolled into a ditch headfirst. Buggy had completely flipped over luckily into ferns which had cushioned the impact. Baby was fine, still sleeping in fact. Toddler thought it was hilarious and I was in tears.

Your mum is an idiot, ignore her. What a ridiculous thing for her to say.

I noticed that DS(6) was struggling to get his shoes on. I asked him if they were tight and he said yes. So I took him to the shoe shop to get his feet measured, His shoes were 3 sizes too small. I have no idea how long he'd been walking around in too small shoes as he'd never said anything. I felt like a complete failure as a parent.

I also cut DS’s finger when cutting his nails when he was a baby.

I remember my mother stepping on my toe in stiletto heals.My toe went black. She also locked me in the garage when I wouldn’t eat my cauliflower, which she knew I hated, then tired to force feed me it cold, then smacked me when I wreched. That was just child abuse though.

First night out of hospital with ex-premature baby (dd had been in nicu for over a month), dd cries and wakes us up, dh jumps up, gets his foot tangled in moses basket stand and manages to kick it over. Lands upside down with dd still in it. She was ok.

I did the exact same thing OP! It was when my LO was 3 months old. It was awful, I had thrown the keys onto the front seat and shut the doors and the car locked itself. 6 burly firemen turned up and smashed the window. I felt guilty and shaky for ages afterwards but now (6 years later) it is a funny anecdote and my DS loves hearing about when he was locked in the car!

Same thing happened to my mum with my baby brother in the car in the 90s. She managed to lock the keys and my brother in the car (manual toggle locks in those days). She did have a spare set but it was miles away at home. This was before mobile phones, so she had to leave the car and walk to nearest phone box to phone her dad and get him the retrieve the spare key from our house and bring it to her. It It took about 90minutes total, only now I am a parent do I realise how stressful this would have been for her. I think my brother was asleep, although i can't be sure.

She was social worker on her way to work....

Luna

My DD7 is really struggling at school, we need all the support we can get. Today was the day of the annual one to one teacher to parent evening. My DH and I did not remember to go. 😣😭
The teacher is lovely, but Im sure she will (silently) judge me and blame me for my DDs problems.

Your mums being very OTT, people lock kids in cars all the time, I’ve seen it many times.

I have done far worse but can’t post the detail as it will out me but it involved coast guards and almost hypothermia 😐.

i put my DD in her handheld car seat once in the kitchen, then got in the car and drove down the road.... only remembered when i got to the end of my road! She was fine...

Also DS known for dramatics had tangled himself up in the strings of a bunch of balloons at a party, another kid came over to me to tell me and I was like yeah great and continued to chat etc... until someone shouted for scissors very loudly and i realised he was actually being strangled by the baloon ribbon... He was fine though but still harps on about it 6 years later"

Your mum is talking bilge. Of course Social Services are not going to to turn up even to speak to you, let-alone to take your child away. I sure they have enough to do deal with parents who really do neglect their children. You made an honest mistake which you dealt with admirably and promptly. You mother’s attitude is horrible.

When we were kids, my Dad parked at the top of the hill, got out to get something but forgot to pull up the handbrake - you can probably guess what happened next.

The car rolled down the hill with four screaming children inside and I've never seen him run so fast! He did manage to get back into the car and stop it before anything happened.

Your mum is BU and sounds like a big of a bully. Has she never made a mistake.

I once let DS fall off the sofa. I turned away for a second away in the midst of a change. He couldn't roll but was very greasy from eczema cream, kicked his legs a couple of times and went feet first off the changing mat and then landed on his front. Luckily the sofa is really low but I felt awful. He gave me this look that said "how could you?!"

This happened to me. When I was researching the car all the ads showed women putting their keycard into the boot with their shopping bags and handbags.

I contacted the manufacturer afterwards who explained that the car locking with the keycard inside isn't what they expect to happen but it does happen sometimes so advise keeping the key with you. I keep it in my pocket now!

My little boy was about the same age. Roadside was hours away and eventually my uncle got his hands on a glass hammer and broke the passenger door window so we could get the key and get him out. I was chatting and singing to him for most of it. He was perfectly fine and doesn't remember any of it four years later.

I really wouldn't pay too much attention to your mum. You were clearly upset by the situation. A normal reaction from your mum is a bit of comfort and not a ridiculous suggestion about social services. These things happen and you're probably going to be so conscious of having the key with you, that it's unlikely to happen again.

Long, long ago, even before central locking, I got out of the car and in the time it took to open the other door to retrieve daughter she had reached across and put the button down. A couple of helpful soldiers, we were on the base, were just about to remove the rear window, which was frighteningly easy, when someone came with a length of that flat tape that goes round boxes and is a sod to remove. He managed to wiggle it between the door and frame then manipulate it over the button and lift it.
Anyone, even on MN, who tells you they've never had such a moment is a delusional liar, we've all done it!

DD was petrified of the zipline in the park, I promised her a slice of lemon cake if she was a brave girl and had a go! Of course she wasnt going to get hurt!
She was actually enjoying it until she put both her hands up in the air and fell off.
She cut her elbow and its forever known as "what mummy did to her!"
I always have to say, now explain what happened. People generally understand but initially think I must have done something awful.

Btw. What happened today, it's a technical blip, not your fault.

YANBU! Literally the exact same thing happened me, and it could've ended the same way. Only reason it didn't was I was outside my house and was able to get into my house I was able to get my spare key. But my point is if I'd been out anywhere else and not near my house, I would've had same outcome as you. Please don't beat yourself up. I've learnt to just always have the key in my hand when I get out of car.

We had a keyless car in the States recently and we found that if the fob was within a certain distance of the car it was unlocked, we thought at first that the locking mechanism wasn't working properly.

I once left a friend's child in the trolley at the checkout, it was only when I was packing my stuff, wishing that the howling child would shut up that I remembered her.

Well the very worst one was when we were on holiday with my mum. Dp though I had ds, I was with my mum and thought dp was looking after ds. My mum had put a cup of tea (no milk or cold water added) in her bedroom to sit and read and popped back to get a biscuit. Ds went into the room and tipped it all down his front. Had to be air lifted to the kids hospital because the hospital close to us didn't treat children. It was horrific.
Same ds, different holiday. I was in the pool with older ds, dp let youngest run to get me with no armbands on and he dived straight into the pool. Only as he jumped in did dp shout me and I realised he was under the water.
Also the time we went to a farm park I let him have a bounce on a high trampoline, he ran away from me to the other side and fel off head first.
Older ds in his bike, riding down a hill. On the left of the hill is a big muddy slope that goes down to a river. Ds hit a stone, it tiped his bike, he lost his balance and down the slope he went. Luckily the river was low and there is a bit of a banking so he didn't fall into the river, but it was a struggle to get to him at 8 months pregnant. Had to leave the bike behind.

Yours is mild compared to mine. If anyone should have social services at their door it should be me OP.

I still cry when I think about the first one, it was so traumatic. He was only 1 and a half, it was also delt with really badly at both hospitals. Ds suffered unnecessary pain and was almost given medication that he should never have been given.

My daughter (probably then about 10 months) and I were playing a game where I would pretend to be a crocodile, she would put her finger near to my open mouth, then snatch it away before I closed my mouth. Except she put her finger in my mouth and I clamped my teeth shut on her finger - so hard, it actually hurt my teeth, and left dents in her finger. Oh how she howled.

She is nine now, and says she remembers the incident. But she has forgiven me.

Did this exact thing a couple of weeks ago! Luckily the husband was within shouting distance with his key.

Also a few years ago glanced at the baby in the mirror while we were driving on the M1 to see he wasn't strapped in. Thankfully this was back in the day where there was an actual hard shoulder to immediately pull over... It's all stupid "smart motorway" now so I have no idea what I'd do if it happened again.

My colleague and her husband had a total fail when they were passing their carry cot from one to the other. Their son, just a few months old, tumbled down their stone steps and fractured his skull. For months afterwards she would cry just remembering it. The doctor at the hospital rightly pointed out that she and her husband would be far more traumatised than the baby. He was right.

No SS were involved. Your mum sounds toxic!