Using fork in right hand, knife in left..

[AG29]

I am aware it’s meant to be the other way round but I feel most comfortable with my fork in right hand and knife in left. The opposite feels uncomfortable and I was never taught any different growing up. It’s never caused me too many problems. I generally have good table manners.

My OH’s mum is a bit of a nightmare in general. If we eat there (not often thankfully but Christmas next week). She has told me to swap hands before but I don’t feel comfortable that way. To the point I avoid eating there as much as possible. OH reminds me to eat with fork in left if we are going over there too and I’m sick of being spoke to like a child.

Aibu to think they should just leave it be? Does it really matter. It’s not like I’m eating with my bloody hands!

So you break them on purpose, not intentionally.

But several of us on this thread have pointed out that we have moved in those social scenes and professions that supposedly have this way of old fashioned thinking whilst using our knives in our left hands

Have the people on this thread covered all of them? Highest ranks of law, politics, military, diplomatic service? Hung out with the aristos?

Bully for you if you have, great. Personally, I'm teaching my children the social norms so it just isn't an issue for them and I never have to worry about them being embarrassed.

My field isn't nearly as up its own arse as those I've mentioned above and yet I have 4/5 formal dinners a year to go to where I find it far more comfortable to be on top of the etiquette. I've never once noticed someone at these dinners with their knife in their left hand.

One of my sons, aged 34, does this. He is right handed. So he steadies his food with his knife and tears at it to cut it with his fork. I tried to get him out of the habit when he was growing up, but was told by my wife to leave him alone. We ate out with him and his wife a couple of nights ago and I noticed that he still does it. Very cack-handed to me.

And anyway left handers are superior to right handers as we have managed to adapt in a right handed world, so there

It shouldn't be a societal norm ... it is discriminatory and prejudiced against left-handers (or those that are right-handed but whose brain works slightly differently than others). How dare you look down on others who don't do as you do ...

I don't think it's something any of you should be proud of upholding and continuing your judginess down to the next generation ... ugh.

I do this. I didn't even realize it was wrong until I was around 20 and on a date. The guy asked me if I was left handed, I didn't even know what he was talking about. To me it seems the correct way.

Now I am thinking about my daughter. So as kids we learn to eat our food that has already been cut up. So should I be teaching her to use her left hand even thought she is right handed....? Seems so weird to me.... But then eating things like pasta everyone uses their dominant hand, correct? So why not just use the other hand for the knife which is not always needed...

@MilkTrayLimeBarrel 😂 I am one of the most highly educated people I know and have worked (and dined) in very prestigious company. I also hold my knife and fork the wrong way round (although held and used correctly!) It has been noticed on occasion when I’ve swapped them round on the table but whether or not I’ve been judged or not honestly doesn’t bother me. I often speak at events with a dinner and I’d like to think that this has more of an impact than the hand I hold my fork in (I assume it does as I’m often asked to return to places and if I was judged solely on my fork use I’d rather not go back!)

If I’m wearing with a fork only - it’s in my right hand. Same as most right handed people.

Why would you then need to use the fork in the left hand just because you have a knife?

“Phone for the fish knives, Norman.”

Repeat as necessary.

Im left handed. I have fork in left,knife in right. I simply couldnt do it the other way round. A bit like trying to write with my right hand.

Strange that she should be so keen on the etiquette of using cutlery the 'correct' way round, but at the same time show such appalling bad manners by telling you off.

I’m teaching my children that they should never be embarrassed or care about the opinions of people who think they should be embarrassed by which hand they eat with.
And by the way, whoever said you’re a twat if you’d look down on someone for a hand preference is 100% correct.

“ Phone for the fish knives, Norman.”

The point of that poem is to make fun of people who don’t know the “rules”. It’s vile. But not in the way most people think it is.

Interesting that some posters have noted the potential parallel with sneering at left handed people for not writing 'correctly' as it isn't all that long ago that left handed children were forced to write 'correctly' with their right hands.

My left handed grandmother was but the practise had died out by the time my left handed dad was at school, so some time around the second world war.

it isn't all that long ago that left handed children were forced to write 'correctly' with their right hands.

My dad, at school in the 30s and 40s.
My brother at school in the 60s and 70s.

Honesty can't believe how many people give a toss how others use their cutlery. We all eat the "correct" way but I always feel bad for my daughter. She's left handed but eats as if she's right handed. My fault as that's how I set the table but am sure it must be hard to eat that way.
When you go out for a meal do you really notice if others eat the wrong way? If you do maybe you should try getting a life!

What’s the “etiquette” then around when someone is just using a single piece of cutlery, eg a soup spoon. Not that I am bothered really, as I am left handed and therefore use the spoon in my dominant hand. Same as I write, brush my teeth etc with that hand also.

I can’t use chopsticks either. I’ve tried umpteen times and just can’t. I never realised using Western cutlery was also offensive. And there’s me thinking it was better than eating with my fingers.

Maybe I am common but I don’t see that eating with cutlery in the “wrong” hands is bad manners. It’s hardly like spraying food everywhere when talking, licking a plate, or my own personal hate, sniffing a plate of food.

@PriscillaTheHun
I'm with your MIL on this one. I'm amazed when people don't have basic good table manners (which includes holding knife and fork correctly)

This, I'm with you and the MIL
On reading the title I automatically thought "well that's completely the wrong way round!"
Going by some of the replies a few people do this too.
It's just basic table manners/etiquette, do people not learn them anymore?!
I'd totally think they had never been taught the correct way to hold cutlery growing up rather than it being a so called choice.

However, because I have good manners, I would never criticise someone or make them uncomfortable for it
Same, I would silently judge though

This thread has actually reduced me to tears, and I’m not even joking.

Should I also stop writing with my left hand, then? You ignorant, petty-minded bigot.

No, nothing wrong with writing with your left hand at all, of course there isn't.

When it comes to table etiquette, I guess I'm strangely old fashioned
And no, I'm not posh in the slightest.
I just see it as basic table manners. Basic life skills and all that.

@WotchaTalkinBoutWillis

Same, I would silently judge though

Them you're a twat .

I've got no problem with people not being able to eat with chopsticks - it took me years to get it, and my technique has been known to make Japanese businessmen wince!

What I do have a problem with, is people being proud of not being able to eat with chopsticks, in a very racist manner, and particularly in front of Japanese guests and hosts. That is, to me, not just racist and bigoted, but also incredibly gauche and bad mannered. I was embarrassed for and by those people.

Bookworm, I'm sorry you've been so upset by this thread.

Fair enough lol

I am left-handed and wouldn't dream of taking a fork into my left hand when using a knife which I'm holding in my left hand as it's my dominant one.
TBH, if someone tried commenting on it, they'd be probably told in very certain terms up which hole they could stick their objections. Also, I can't imagine an idiot who would actually have a problem with that.