He wont have tory voting grandparents over for xmas

[Smilebehappy123]

As it says in the title
DH refusing to have my grandparents for xmas dinner, says he cant stand to have xmas dinner with them as they shared with us yesterday that they voted tory , we are both very left wing and have always voted labour
Not only does he not want to have xmas dinner with them he doesn't want to socialise at all with them.
What can I do ? Grandfather is very political so this topic will be brought up
Dh says he cant stand the selfish old bastards and doesn't want to know them

I actually don't think he is being unreasonable after reading your updates. They're clearly quite unpleasant people.

I'd probably still invite them if they promised not to discuss politics and to keep conversation light and if they don't they'll be asked to leave.
Why the hell should anyone have to listen to that offensive bullshit in their own home?

Your grandparents sound bloody awful tbh.

I wouldn't have a copy of the DM anywhere near my house.

Hm, is there a bit of a back story? I must admit I’d really struggle with hearing such objectionable views being expressed. That said, I’ve gritted my teeth through social occasions with racist, homophobic and right wing rellies! But back then I used to drink quite a bit to numb the pain! It is unreasonable if your DH is making you choose between him and your grandparents, if we are talking the odd social occasion where they get the message if told ‘no politics’. If the back story is you see them a lot and their views get aired a lot, I can see him having had enough. Would they accept a very firm word to the effect that their views upset you and you don’t want to hear them? Could your DH tell them their views make it hard for him to be around them? Sounds like there may be deliberate goading on their part if they know you both hold left-wing views.

I do think anyone who voted Tory is selfish but these are elderly people . To uninvite them would be awful 😞

Your dh needs to grow the fuck up, people can have different political options but still be respectful

do we not live in a democracy or does DH think only his opinion matters?

Mauve- that's the thing he hasnr got a controlling bone in his body a good husband excellent father
And no marital issues, we are politically very similar and share similar views. he wont force his viewpoint in others and iv just shown him all these comments and once he stopped laughing at some he actually said 'if they come round and dont mention the election there will be no animosity and we all have
A nice day, this will not happen though with these
grandparents

What's it got to do with democracy? DH's Racist Nan can vote Tory all she likes, of course it's her right to. Doesn't mean we have to listen to any of her views or have that shit round our children.

After hearing the updates I don’t blame him. I wouldn’t have anything to do with them.

They sound absolutely vile, detestable people. I don’t blame your DH. Emotions are running higher than ever after this election. He doesn’t want their crowing, their glorying in a victory which will mean so much hardship and pain for those in need.

OK having seen your recent posts, I am thinking again.

If they won't do the standard thing of avoiding divisive topics, then tbh, I wouldn't want to hear it either.

I am genuinely embarrassed to tell people I voted labour as I could be lumped in with people like this....

Just to clarify he isnt making me choose between me and them
I'm spending the morning with them tomorrow, he has no issues with that just wont be part of it

Okay so you don’t like their views either! Have you invited them out of politeness? They don’t sound so. Wealthy people with different political views can have very good manners. Your grandparents don’t sound like they have manners and may actually enjoy making people feel a bit uncomfortable.

If you give people like this rules it fuels their entitlement (they must say something after all to show their significance). You are stuck between rescinding the invitation or instituting a no politics rule and accepting that your DH will explode.

It sounds like there is already a fair bit of bad blood here....

I would just take politics off the table. Half my close family voted to leave and vote Tory, the other half voted to remain and vote for other parties. Extended family some vote for remain and vote tory, some vote leave and vote for other parties.

Christmas, weddings and funeral politics is off the table. We all think we are right I know I am but respect the others opinions (sort of)

Your grandparents should have the decency to keep their opinions to themselves, especially since it is not their own home.
I wouldn't want to spend Christmas listening to that kind of bigoted shit.
But apparently now when you don't want to hear awful comments in your own home you are the bigoted one.

What a hideous sore loser and control freak. It’s your house too and they are your grandparents - how dare he ban them? We have a democracy in this country so maybe he should accept that too and then have a good Xmas with family who won’t be around for ever.

Actuallly I can see your husbands point if they are loudmouths in addition to festering pustules of Tory support. If they can keep it to themselves then fine. If they are just going to be goady fuckers than I can see how that would put a damper on Christmas.

OP your DH might like the song I mentioned before. It goes:
To the people of Middle England, in their 50s, 60s, plus
We are your progeny, and we love you very much
We don’t want to antagonise, don’t want to piss you off
But we’re running out of ways to say ‘Enough is enough’

If you read the Daily Mail then you can’t meet your Grandchildren
We can’t have hate and bile infiltrate their tiny minds
If you read the Daily Express then you can’t see them at all
We won’t have your reactionary thoughts around the small

We know you only read it for the crossword
Yet the crossword book we bought you stays mysteriously unused
We know you only need it for the TV guide
Yet the views you shared at Christmas were not learned from Countryfile

If you read the Daily Mail then you can’t see your Grandchildren
We’ll say we don’t know where you live and haven’t for some time
If you read the Daily Express we’ll say you’re somewhere we can’t find
Cos Gran and Grandpa and their views live in 1959

(Outrage! Immigrants!)

So to the people of middle England who have children in their prime
Heed our words of caution there’s still lots and lots of time
Take up yoga or pilates, learn a language or play whist
But be sure to ditch the tabloids that print bilge and prejudice

(Europe! Women belong at home!)

If you read the Daily Mail then you can’t see your Grandchildren
We’ll tell them that you passed away and that’s the end of the that
If you read the Daily Express we won’t tell them you exist
And your hateful views will die with you and neither will be missed

“Will only go to their funerals”. Why bother at all? What an unpleasant man.

OP your husband is an intolerant idiot. Something I've come to realise since the EU referendum is just how many people who think of themselves as left-wing or liberal and who think they're tolerant really, really aren't because they cannot bear people having different opinions to themselves. It's incredibly arrogant.

Most people want roughly similar things for their country; a fair society, prosperous economy, decent environment etc. Politics is just the different routes to get there. There may be disagreement about this but neither is right or wrong.

Depends on the brand of Toryism surely? I went out when DH’s family came over today because I simply refuse to be around gloating, racist nationalists - which they are. Doesn’t mean I won’t welcome genuine input/debate, but they’re of the Katie Hopkins ilk and, given we have 2 disabled children, I just don’t need it right now.

Here's a for your H.

Dappled things I love that

Pannalash why would he want a doughnut?