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Original poster

Do women... 'give up driving'?? Is this sexist... Don't hear re men giving up driving.

163 replies

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 09/12/2019 20:07

Met with some old school pals that I'd not seen for years.... We met in large town ...
Everyone... (Apart from me) said they 'no longer drove'... They all live in small market towns and still work...we all got our licenses late teens...

So... Is this unusual 5 women... 4 had not driven 'for years'...
I was a bit flabberghasted...they're all feminists /workers....

OP posts:
AnneLovesGilbert · 09/12/2019 20:25

I hate driving, I’m in my 30s, passed last year as was pregnant and we live in a village. Hate it so much and do it as little as possible. I’m “giving up” as soon as I get the chance. Sadly, we love where we live and there’s no public transport so it won’t be anytime soon.

My SIL gave up driving in her 30s and my DB does it all.

foamrolling · 09/12/2019 20:26

That's really weird. I'm in my 40s and don't know any women that have done this. Do they live somewhere with particularly good public transport or something?

reginafelangee · 09/12/2019 20:26

Never heard of anyone- make or female - doing this.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 09/12/2019 20:27

Bizarre- if they gave up because they like to be ferried around by their husband it’s not sexiest it’s pathetic

feellikeanalien · 09/12/2019 20:27

My DM has recently given up driving but she is in her late 80s and her sight isn't so good. She isn't very happy about it though. My Ddad gave up a good few years before but I've never heard of people in their 40s doing that.

I would hate to be dependent on someone else to drive me around.

marshmallowss · 09/12/2019 20:28

Okay well this is nuts. I never expect to 'give up driving' 🤣 ever.

AlunWynsKnee · 09/12/2019 20:29

I'm 50 and don't know anyone of my age who's given up driving for non medical reasons.

corythatwas · 09/12/2019 20:30

Do you know that they expect their men folk to ferry them around?

My parents lived in a small market town with very limited public transport and neither of them drove, because they were already in the 50s worried about the environmental implications. I and my siblings grew up without access to a car: we just got very used to walking and to planning our lives without transport. 2 of us still don't drive. Dh only got a licence in his 40s because he had to for work, but very rarely uses the car unless he has to.

I happened to be standing around the other day with a couple of colleagues I don't know terribly well and it turned out neither of us drive: two of us live in a town with reasonable public transport, one in a much smaller place. You just organise your life accordingly.

Pinkblueberry · 09/12/2019 20:31

My MIL recently did this. She’s always been a nervous driver. Her and FIL got a new car about 6 months ago and she hasn’t driven it once. He drives her to work now. It does baffle me.

Sirzy · 09/12/2019 20:32

Also I think that, male or female, if your not confident or happy driving then often it is much more sensible to admit it and give up rather than carry on anyway

user1493413286 · 09/12/2019 20:32

I don’t know of this although I know a lot of couples where the woman has never learnt to drive and the man does it all. I don’t know any couples where the man doesn’t drive though....

imnotsureaboutdinosaurs · 09/12/2019 20:33

My mum stopped driving in her 40s but my parents are both stuck in the 1950s.

It blows my mind that she's happy to live like that. They live in a quiet town with next to zero public transport so when she's not working her strenuous 9 hours a week (she's 55), she sits indoors all day.

PurpleDaisies · 09/12/2019 20:34

I know a few people who have done this for health reasons. Their sex is irrelevant.

I know a fair few couples with a default male driver.

imnotsureaboutdinosaurs · 09/12/2019 20:35

The reason she stopped is because my Dad would drive everywhere unless he wanted a drink if they went out Hmm and she just doesn't have the confidence now.

Pugsleyaddams · 09/12/2019 20:35

I gave up driving. Before kids we had 2 cars and I'd do all the shopping, drive wherever I fancied going and 99% of the time if I go out with DH he drove anyway. After I had my first I used the car a lot until I went back to work part time and then we'd do the shopping on a Saturday or Sunday morning before going out together with dd. We live in London so when I was with dd we'd walk to parks, soft play, local shops or get the tube to museums and my car just sat there for weeks on end. We both walk to work and I couldn't really afford to pay for my car to just sit there so I got rid of it. DH drives manual and I auto so he had an auto for a while but I never drove it so he went back to manual and I just gave up driving. I suppose that could be a 'sexist' reason because if I didn't have kids and work part time I'd still have it but it's just how it is 🤷🏼‍♀️

NearlyOutedMyself · 09/12/2019 20:36

I don't drive as frequently as I used to but I'd hope never to give up driving entirely unless for medical reasons. I had to ferry my boyfriend around after he broke his arm, I wouldn't want to be reliant on someone else entirely.

TheFaerieQueene · 09/12/2019 20:37

If health isn’t a problem, I think this is bizarre.

MrsTerryPratchett · 09/12/2019 20:39

My dad would happily have given up it my mum let him!

I do see women picking up their male partners and swapping seats. I cannot fathom it. But then I like driving.

MyChemicalMummy · 09/12/2019 20:41

I gave up driving a couple of years ago, in my late 30's. My reason we only have one car in the household which my DP uses to get to work he works a 2pm to 10pm shift, and has a 30 min drive.

I live 10 min walk to work and 10 min walk to the town centre too. I have no need to drive so I don't. I also prefer to be ferried around.

BlouseAndSkirt · 09/12/2019 20:44

I don’t know any couples where the man doesn’t drive though...

Meet my family!

Nacknick · 09/12/2019 20:46

I love driving
I'm in my 50s
Can't see me changing any time soon...

NemophilistRebel · 09/12/2019 20:48

I know a few women who have up driving in their 30’s and 40’s

Mostly because their DH’s drive most places and the odd occasions the DW’s drive the DH’s comment negatively on their driving so they don’t bother

GrumpyHoonMain · 09/12/2019 20:53

Most of the women I know who ‘gave up’ driving early had financial reasons for doing so in that they didn’t work or worked so local it didn’t make sense to run a second car.

It doesn’t matter how rich someone appears to be, there are quite a lot of people who can’t afford to run two cars or don’t prioritize it.

MrsKoala · 09/12/2019 20:57

I can’t remember the last time I drove. Dh hates me driving him and I hate driving full stop. I never have driven on a motorway or driven in the dark. I will drive the 5 miles to my parents village and back but not much further. I only passed 5 years ago tho and then only got a car a year later. It’s not for me. I’m 42.

My mum Is similar, she only drives to the supermarket and back once a week and she shits herself the whole time. My sister never even learned.

I don’t feel too sorry for Dh having to ferry me about. I cook absolutely every meal and do all the housework, childcare and admin!

MrsKoala · 09/12/2019 21:00

Of the people I know who are my age who don’t drive, one is a woman who has epilepsy and 2 are men who just don’t want to. All are married and their partner drives. It seems to work for them.