To think you are very lucky if you dont have to work?

[malificent7]

Dp is amazing but not a high earner and also i want to be a bit independent howver i haul my butt out if bed to work a 12 hour shift where i get told off as i havn't been trained properly...i am very jealous of those who don't have to work.

I love what I do. I am self employed and work the hours to suit me. PLenty time for gym, yoga, pottereing, forest walks. I am currently giving myself a month's holiday, won't start back now until the new year.

I am happy with my work/life balance.

I don’t think my DH is a high earner especially (we earn about 40k a year and live up north) but we budget well and get by. I work but it’s very sporadic success so I’m mostly with the kids. I do usually feel really guilty that we could be saving if I worked, and I’m qualified to earn more than DH. I will when they’re all in school.

I dont work, I was able to be a sahm with my sons, both in 30s now. I worked when they were in secondary and also achieved my doctorate when they were small, it's not luck though, my husband works hard and makes good choices, like many others, and works in a field that means his company is a go to. He lives his work, so I dont feel guilty not working for the past 15 years, packed it in age 40.
I lunch, dressmake, walk my dogs for miles, spend time with friends and family etc....
I also volunteer for a small homeless charity, something I am so passionate about, being literally close to home.
I feel totally fulfilled!

I always feel jealousy is unreasonable, it is an ugly emotion and not one I have felt as an adult.

However it must be nice to have the option not to work. People who can comfortably afford to not work have more choices about what they do with their time but that depends how motivated they are.

For myself, I really enjoyed work, particularly as I got older, was more experienced and confident; I was fulfilled, met interesting people, wouldn't have wanted to stay at home but would have jumped at the opportunity as a young woman. I can see both sides.

You said: "....work a 12 hour shift where i get told off as i havn't been trained properly."

Is there no possibility of you undertaking some type of training which would enable you to get a more congenial job? 12 hour shifts don't sound much fun, even worse if you're admonished (that's bullying). Think about it, look at evening/day classes and see if there's anything you fancy.

In the meantime, take care of yourself, remember you can only do your best and something good may be around the corner.

Loves

don't you think if your life was one long holiday you wouldn't enjoy it as much? Part of the loveliness of holidays is the break from the mundane.

I think it's like that for her partner, because he grew up rich and now he's a dull oaf who doesn't appreciate any of it. She still appreciates it.

I'm waiting to find out if @Parttimers is an mlm bot

I’m friends with a couple in their early 50’s. The husband had made some very sensible investments in his 20’s which had allowed him to retire at 40. However, he was bored out of his mind and now works part time, just to have something to do.

Think it depends on your job. I’ve only ever worked in retail so don’t miss it at all. Miss the money but I never had much anyway.
Starting work in the new year as a career.

YANBU

I am unable to work because of my disabilities but I still think I'm extremely lucky that my husband earns enough that I don't have to work.

I'd love to afford to be retired. I had two months between jobs this summer and it was bliss.

I took a career break this year to travel. It's been one of the most incredible experiences ever, including the six weeks I will have had off since returning before starting work again, doing nothing but lunches and the gym. I am looking forward to starting work again.

I’m a teacher. Not MLM...no way!!

I don't have to work but I choose to , it's a minimum wage retail job but fits in around the kids . Lunches and coffees get dull after a few years !

As someone who spent 18 months trying to find work, I can tell you that there is nothing lucky about it. It absolutely SUCKS. If I had a pound for every person who commented "Oh, it must be nice" in a sneery, judgemental tone I'd be rich...albeit still working as I can't sit still for five minutes.

@reginafelangee
I chose to work.
Being a stay at home parent would bore me. I'm just not that into craft and housework.

Neither am I. Hence why I leave the craft crap to the preschool and have a cleaner 3 times a week. I am SAHM

I think if someone has the option to choose not to work (I.e. they have enough money from whatever means that they don't need to work) then they are lucky.

I don't think it always means they are happy not to work. I know of a couple of people (ladies as it happens) who didn't work when their children were small because their husbands earn more than enough to keep the family in a nice lifestyle. Both ladies chose to work part time once the children reached secondary school as they wanted to use their skills and wanted to see other adults.

At present, I have to work as I am the main earner, though we are fortunate to be extremely secure financially. I enjoy my job though and get a lot of satisfaction from it. I may go part time in a few years though.

@userxx
YABVVU. I could think of nothing worse than relaying on someone else.

You should try it sometime, it's not so bad 💅

I would never not pay my own way through life or live off my DH. If we won the lotto and could both retire, or I was wealthy enough to contribute then that's different.

I’ve been able to go down to four days a week recently and feel so lucky I can do this.

I would love love love to not have to work at all. That would be wonderful!

I went mad when I didn’t work for 6 months . It was like Groundhog Day; a relentless round of cooking and cleaning and laundry and house admin and going for coffee with women who did exactly the same thing. It was tedious as hell. It was such a relief to get a new job that turned out to be great.

When I had Dd1 I worked 12hr shifts in a factory. I was a single parent, dd spent alot of time with my parents and sister. I can still remember the cold winter mornings pushing her pram to my parents at 6am.
When I met DH I was able to give up work and look after my mum who by this time had dementia.
I'm lucky DH is a high earner and now we have Dd2 I'm able to be at home.
I love being a SAHM.

I think there's a difference between your partner earning enough to get by, and being rich enough to be able to enjoy not working.

I also think it's quite selfish to let all financial obligations fall to your partner. I would never, ever do this.

At most, I would let him work, but then do EVERYTHING in the house .. and I don't think I could live like that anyway.

A couple of my friends don't work because their husbands jobs pay well enough not to need the money. However, the other reason they don't work is that their husband's jobs are so demanding and inflexible that they couldn't really continue in the jobs they had pre-children. Both would have liked to work really and one in particular is quite unhappy and frustrated at times with being at home, especially now that their children are older. I feel incredibly fortunate to have a job I enjoy and also to have a husband who doesn't see his job as more important and supports my career, despite earning significantly more than me.

I think there's a difference between your partner earning enough to get by, and being rich enough to be able to enjoy not working

I think this is a very good point. I wouldn’t feel comfortable not working if DH didn’t make such a ridiculous amount of money/loves his job/was doing it before I came along anyway! And it wouldn’t be anyway near as fun not having the money to do whatever I like. But it would still be worth it to stay with DS, for me.