Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to ask school if being late just this one time could be changed on the register?

220 replies

Kimmykimkim36 · 05/12/2019 07:12

My son (7) has always had 100% attendance and punctuality at school. He also knows that at the end of term he gets a gold 100% badge and a certificate. He loves this!
I've been sick for the past 2 days and a lovely parent from school offered to bring him in, except on one of those days they got in around 5-10 mins late due to being stuck in traffic. AIBU to ask if this one episode of lateness could be changed on the register? He was so excited to be nearing the end of term, knowing he had been in on time everyday, but this one day of being late changes everything.

OP posts:
GruciusMalfoy · 05/12/2019 07:36

Of course it would be unreasonable, he was late. I'm sure he's not the only child it will have happened to on a one off occasion like this.

BuggerOffAndGoodDayToYou · 05/12/2019 07:36

In my school he would still qualify for 100% attendance if he was in before 9.30. Before 9.30 he would get an L code which is NOT absence, after 9.30 a U code which does count as absence.

Registers are legal documents and cannot be falsified.

RhymingRabbit3 · 05/12/2019 07:36

*You should be asking the school to stop rewarding children for something they can't control.

Perfect attendance and arriving on time is not award worthy.*

Agreed. Especially at primary school where kids rely on their parents to drop them at school so if they're late it is likely not the kids fault.

"Rewarding" kids for perfect attendance is tantamount to "punishing" kids for not attending. Which is hardly fair to the child to had tonsillitis, or had to go to a grandparent's funeral.

Mmmmdanone · 05/12/2019 07:37

Just to let people know, my ds is never ill so he also gets perfect attendance. I don't make him go in when ill- he just never is. My DD on the other hand...

Scarlettpixie · 05/12/2019 07:37

Yabu. He was late. Most times kids are late for school it will be the fault of the parents at least to some degree.

I hate these awards. Totally wrong to reward kids for things they cannot control (like traffic or illness).

Blindandfrozen · 05/12/2019 07:37

Why aren’t you asking the school why they reward perfect attendance?

My son has a long term medical condition which means he would never get that award due to hospital appointments. It’s only an accident of genetics that your son doesn’t have the same. It’s disability discrimination

DryHeaving · 05/12/2019 07:38

@lastqueenodscotland she most definitely wouldn't be THAT parent, don't be so rude
She is asking a question not demanding anything

MyNewBearTotoro · 05/12/2019 07:39

yes, you would be unreasonable because he was late. If she changes it for your son she’d have to change it for the child he arrived with and then no doubt put her parents would get wind of it and want the register changed for their children too. The register is a legal document submitted to the local authority so it can’t just be changed by the teacher.

I don’t know why you think your son is extra special or his reason for being late excusable - being late is far less excusable than being unwell so to waiver for being late seems especially unfair when there are other children who will have been off because they were genuinely poorly who aren’t getting the badge. It’s never the child’s fault if they’re unwell or late and I don’t like 100% awards but how can you expect the teacher to waiver the lateness and give your son the badge when his attendance is not 100% when the rest of his class will have their absences counted? And those other students will no doubt know he was late one day.

Attendance badges are an unfair system in the first places as they penalise children with health conditions/ disabilities etc but to expect that your child gets preferential treatment goes even beyond the usual unfairness of the award. Your son was late, his attendance is not 100% so of course he shouldn’t be exempt unless the teacher exempts every child.

OldEvilOwl · 05/12/2019 07:39

YABU! He WAS late! Just don't make a big deal out of it, he can't win all the time

CactusAndCacti · 05/12/2019 07:40

My DC were late once in our 10 years at the school. We moved house and had a car journey, there had been an accident and the only way out of our road was blocked.

It happens.

Youngest is back to walking distance now.

Mammyloveswine · 05/12/2019 07:41

I think attendance rewards and star of the day should both be abolished!

It's not a child's fault if they are ill, and they might go in when they shouldn't and spread illness.

As for star of the day/week, even if every child gets a turn in a class of 30 one poor child has to wait the majority of the school year before it's their turn!

Elisheva · 05/12/2019 07:41

Don't be stupid! Why on earth would a child be 'excited' to not have any late marks?
Because the school have told him that it is important, important enough to win a ‘gold’ award for.
I agree that attendance awards are ridiculous, but don’t be scornful of a child who is doing what he is told.

Saddler · 05/12/2019 07:43

He was late why would they falsify the records?

RiftGibbon · 05/12/2019 07:45

I'm not a fan of the attendance awards because it discriminates against children who cannot attend school for medical reasons.
In the past, school have given rewards for g9d behaviour, good work, best table/cloakroom, helper of the week, reader of the week, etc. Basically configured so that everyone gets an award for something.

RedskyToNight · 05/12/2019 07:46

That's why these 100% attendance rewards are ridiculous (especially at primary where the child probably has zero ability to influence anything).

Good chance to teach him the point is doing your best even if you don't get the award.

And no, school won't change it, as it's a legal record (DD's school won't change her record for when she missed registration even though she was at another activity within school as they say there is not sufficient proof. And your DS wasn't actually there!)

AJPTaylor · 05/12/2019 07:46

2 things.
They can't change the records
They can overlook it/use judgement to give him his certificate

Or you can use it to teach him just how daft the whole idea is. He is no more to blame for being late than his friend who got chicken pox. Outcome is the same.

TheWinterCaillech · 05/12/2019 07:48

Attendance and lateness are an OFSTED hot potato. That’s why schools try and find as many ways as possible to get 100%.

sleepyhead · 05/12/2019 07:52

Many of the children who miss out on a gold badge wont have been able to avoid their lateness.

What a stupid reward system.

goingtotown · 05/12/2019 07:55

He was late. Accept it & let it go.

Walkaround · 05/12/2019 07:56

Does 5-10 minutes late even get marked as officially late on the register? There's normally a time when registers close which is a bit later than official registration time, so even if signing in late to get into the building, the teacher may not have closed the register, yet. There is, however, a cut off time when a child has to be recorded as late - over 10 minutes, for example.

CalleighDoodle · 05/12/2019 07:57

The register is a legal Document.

ACautionaryTale · 05/12/2019 07:57

Maybe I was just lucky but I got 100% attendance from 1st year Junior through to upper sixth so year 3 I think it is now thorough to year 13.

And I was never late.

I am also very proud of my certificates.

Cultoffortnite · 05/12/2019 07:58

Your school needs to wise up and not give out rewards for 100% on time or attendance. It’s not the kids fault if they’re late usually or in everyday in primary, it’s down to the parents or the kids health or circumstances or whatever.
The only thing that really matters is what they do in school when they’re there. You could be on time every day then sit around in your hoop day dreaming all day. Really what’s the point ?

Dentures101 · 05/12/2019 07:59

It's a stupid award. 'congratulations! You were very lucky to never be Ill this year!'

Cultoffortnite · 05/12/2019 08:00

I have a kid with 100 attendance and 100% on time but luckily our school realised how arbitrary that is and he won’t be getting any reward for being healthy, living close to the school and having organised parents