Hidden annoyances of being a single parent.

[OhioOhioOhio]

Taking stuff out of and putting stuff in the attic.

Yes. The pp who says it gets easier is correct.

Make no mistake, my moan is lighthearted. Everything was more difficult with him here. And I'm far less lonely as an official single parent than I was with him. And I have hope now. As a 'couple' each day my heart crumpled.

I guess the attic is small fry.

Having to cut the grass

Being Categorised by that Fuckwit - Boris Johnson as 'feckless and irresponsible' and my children being considered 'ill raised'

If anyone is feckless and irresponsible re their children it is THAT man

Well, I'm not a single parent but just living alone has its problems, must be worse with kids to look after.

I've just had a new oven and nearly every shop asked me 'have you taken out the old one' (when talking about the fitting). Well, no, because I can't do that on my own. And in fact, when the new one was fitted today, it turns out two people couldn't do it easily as the wire was too short to be able to lift it down to the floor!

I have a decorator coming Wed and somehow I have to move all the living room furniture for him ready.

I also hate going in the loft but I don't keep anything up there so don't go very often.

Ignore space

She started a thread I remember last week, annoyed her children had been described as 'ill-raised, ignorant and aggressive

On the basis of this thread, I’m wondering whether she misheard and it was actually space that was being described as such!

Space cadet the point is that as a single parent you have no one else to watch the kids while you fuck about it the attic and try not to fall to your death in front of them with a box of baubles in your hands

Without kids then no one is trying to grate their brother with a cheese grater while you’re in the attic 🙄

Thanks for the reports on this thread.

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Peace and love.

Rubbish bins.
And lawn mowing.
Thankfully now I have two teens to delegate those jobs to.
The fact that this Christmas is not “my” Christmas, so we won’t be together on the 25th. However, I never again have to spend any part of Christmas with my ex mother in law (silver linings and all that )

Not having anyone to sound ideas off

Well, when I had a husband I had to do it all myself cos he was a lazy arse...that's much more annoying than having to do it all alone cos there's no longer a man here.
That said, I can't get the tree out of the loft myself as I'm scared of going in the loft (it's not boarded) so I do ask a friend, or my grown up son comes round.

@Kittykat93 I have so much respect for single parents. It's the hardest thing I've ever had to do, and I'm only four months down the line.

Like others have said, it does get easier. . You do eventually build up a network of friends you can rely on.

So I have NO idea how to get the old filing cabinet down the stairs to get it out the front door. Any ideas anyone?
Depends why you want it out. If you just want to dump it then advertise it on facebook marketplace or somewhere instead "free. buyer collects. Is upstairs" It doesn't seem to matter how heavy or old and knackered an item is, as long as you haven't literally set fire to it and its free there always seems to be someone who's willing to bring a mate and a van and cart it away.

One of my big annoyances is never getting a birthday or Christmas present that's been chosen by my child. Always had a relative who'll buy something and give it to my dd so she has something to give me, but none of them are ever willing to take her out shopping so she can choose something herself. It's all unnecessary obviously, but it's still shite.

Most annoying thing at mo is fact I have flu & literally couldn't get out of bed to take DD to school on Friday ...when ex hubby finds out he will have a go.
She's had a cold herself & slept till 11.30am so a day off probs did her good.

When does it get easier?? It’s been 3 years here and it’s getting harder!! 😩 things like running out of nappies/washing powder and not having anyone to go and get them or having to drag out all the children together because none are old enough to be left alone, that’s very annoying. But obviously not the hardest part

@Mercedes519 Lie it on it's back and slide it. Easy peasy.

Definitely the not just being able to pop out the house to get milk etc when DC are in bed. Even when they are awake, it's a pain getting a small child ready and out simply for a 5 minute trip to the shop.

Doing and paying for everything yourself. That's an obvious one though.

Being the only adult there for DC to complain or talk non-stop to.

Waking up on Christmas Day without your DC if they are elsewhere.

Pumpkin, for me it's got easier as DS has got bigger and more independent, specially since he got old enough to be left for twenty minutes while I went to the shops. And I think it makes a huge difference if you only have one - I know I find it much easier than some of my friends.

Detailing the thread I know but thanks to everyone who has suggestions for my filing cabinet. Council does collect but only from outside, it’s been on free cycle all week and it’s really only good for scrap. It may have to be the sliding with a rope thing.

However I have already got the decs down from the loft so that’s thing to do...

Then shop online?

You spectacularly miss the point. We can do the shopping alone. We can lug the Xmas tree in on our own if we have to. But the issue is the doing it alone and what that represents. It is particularly hard to forget that Xmas is all about the children and families when it is persistently rammed down your throat and somehow it is harder to be tough and brave about your situation when you have to provide everything and might not even see your child on Xmas Day. My first hearing of Last Christmas has me in tears every year.

And really, where do you get off telling anyone that their experiences, thoughts, feelings are wrong?

Right most of these are about just being single.

Fuck all to do with being single and a parent.

When Ds1 turned 13 I started to be able to leave the two of them at home for a couple of hours while I met up with friends. That made the biggest difference to me, that and being able to attend an appointment or whatever without dragging them with me.
It truly does get easier.

Having to do all the christmas dinner prep and cooking on your own, and by that I mean there’s nobody else to help, not ‘I have to do it myself because DH won’t get off his arse to help.’

Having to do all the present shopping for the DC when you have no childfree time and every delivery made to the house gets twenty questions.

When you’re exhausted and just want someone else to be the strict parent for once. But there is no-one. It’s you again. Being the baddie and Having to dole out the punishment. Again. And then questioning if you’ve been too hard and no-one is there to ask.

Never getting a cup of tea brought to you in bed. I never really realised how nice that is til I met dp and I get one every weekend morning. The hardest stuff really is when they are little and need watching all the time. It does get easier.

things like running out of nappies/washing powder

The first thing I did was create an emergency box for my airing cupboard that has in the things that could be run out of. So tampons, toilet roll, calpol, washing tablets etc.

I rotate the meds but never use anything out of it! Just means I have stuff in an emergency.