Saving seats in train

[managedmis]

Every morning a woman on my train saves her mate a seat. Every morning the train is rammed and loads of people ask her to move her bag but she refuses and saves she saving it for her pal, who eventually shows up. People end up standing, the seat free, then pal arrives. I've seen a couple of people ignore her, move the bag and plump down in the seat, the entire train almost cheered.

What's the protocol here?

I went on a Scots-bound train on a weekend when Scotland were playing at home in the Six Nations. The train manager informed everyone that during the full ticket inspection any passengers with bags found on seats would be charged full adult fare or removed from the train as it was a very busy service. My bag along with a few others, was in the vestibule as the racks were all full. I don't even think anyone used the toilet or buffet during the journey in case we got told off for leaving our seats .

I'm guessing that @CleansUpDragonPoo was using the term 'oriental' because there could have been an assumption on the train that they didn't understand English. But her story goes on to say that, once the bags had been picked up, suddenly they did.

So in this situation, the use of the term isn't offensive.

(I'm also guessing that she wasn't sure if they were Chinese, Japanese or Korean so used the term as a more generic descriptor)

Just move the bag and sit down. She presumably hasn't made a reservation for the bag and her friend probably doesn't have one either, especially if it is a regular commuter service.

I'm not a regular commuter, but use trains for longer journeys several times a year. I always reserve a seat on services where it is possible and like an aisle seat for various reasons.

The last time I was travelling a lady just came up and bluntly asked me to give her my seat (that I had paid to reserve and had the ticket for). She didn't like me at all when I explained that I had paid for and reserved the aisle seat because I need it, but I offered to get up and let her into the window seat next to me, which was free (and had no bags or anything on it). She refused the window seat and then discussed loudly with her friends just how unreasonable I was but I ignored her and carried on reading my book. They all got off at the next station.

Some people are just extremely entitled and have no manners.

I guess the correct approach should be to alert staff and ask them to sort out this clearly antisocial behaviour. Not sure them will thank you for it mind. The other option is just to be assertive and to move the bag and occupy the seat. As long as it doesn't turn in to a ruck this will probably work too. Another option is just to rise above it, be the better person and let others stress about it.

Just go to sit on the seat, if she says it's saved for her seat, look for the reserved sign.
Say no it isn't and plonk yourself down.
If she doesn't move her bag, sling it at her.

Please sit on the bag.

Oh, wasn't aware Oriental was offensive! Thought 'Asian' meant Indian only? My bad. Used the O word thinking 'Chinese' might be offensive, to show they might not speak English or be aware of Western customs, instead of just feeling entitled.

As I said, my bad. Good thing MN police are about..

Oriental is ok for a rug not a person

Why would Asian not refer to someone from any country considered part of Asia?

I'd remove the bag every time. If she want a reserved seat, she needs to choose a form of transporation that offers the ability to reserve a seat, and then do that.

I am not sure WHO people want to report that to, most trains only have a driver onboard, no else to be seen - and trains are too packed for anyone to go from one carriage to the other anyway.

@CleansUpDragonPoo...why would Asian just mean people from India??

You do know that Asia is a whole continent right? [

I remember my DSis, when about 8 months pg, picked up a newspaper from a seat and placed it on the rack above then sat in the seat. A VERY indignant man came back from the loo storming at her that it was HIS seat and she had no right to move his newspaper. The other passengers in the carriage (old fashioned individual 8 seat compartments) suggested quite forcefully that as she was clearly very pg she had every right to take an unoccupied seat.

My usual method would be to ask "oh, what's your friend's disability then", and when told none go into graphic details about mine. That would usually be enough to shame them into moving the bag.

Wow you lot are polite - when I was commuting I would just sit on the seat. Person normally moves bag before arse sits on seat!

Any comment - head tilt and would say I didn’t see it and explain on busy commuter trains best not put a bag on a seat - cannot recall any lip back! A few apologised!

This has been most illuminating. It is not just on trains though is it??

After reading this, I will now in the future then one of the multiple people on my local bus to move their bags to allow me to sit down.

It seems at times that it is just CFery that they sit on the aisle with their bag/jacket on the window seat and just ignore that you are there. And sometimes, they just ignore when I ask them to move.

BIWI you are missing the point. Calling anyone 'Oriental' is offensive in the same way that calling other ethnic groups offensive names is. We are 'Asian'. Oriental is what you would call a rug or a vase. It is considered rude to call people Oriental. Asian is the correct term for all people from Asia.

CleansUpDragonPoo thank you for understanding. 'Oriental' is used for rugs or vases. Calling a person 'Oriental' is like using one of the other derogatory terms for other ethnic groups. Asian is the correct term for people from all of Asia. In fact the world over, Asian generally refers to Northern, Eastern and South East Asians and 'Indian' or 'Pakistani' is used to refer to people from those places. But Asian is the correct term for all.

Move the bag and sit down.

"I'm saving that seat for a friend."

"That's fine, she can show me her seat reservation when she gets on."

Actually, “Oriental” is generally considered offensive in the USA but not in the UK.

The term can be found in public sector use here.

I say “generally” as there may be people in the UK who do find it offensive and people in the US who don’t.

Ask if her friend is disabled. If not, say again please can I sit down.

Ask her if her bag has a ticket!

@damnthatanxiety I wasn't missing the point . I was trying to explain why I thought the term had been used, not defend it.

Used the O word thinking 'Chinese' might be offensive, to show they might not speak English or be aware of Western customs, instead of just feeling entitled.

Tourists would have been enough.

Busy train line commuter here - I wouldn't even engage in conversation - just hand her the bag and sit down - no discussion required ... total CF I can't believe the brass neck of some people