In court today. Terrified

[bakabakabeyond]

In court today regarding child arrangements order. I'm witholding access from my ex to our 1 year old as he is abusive, physically and emotionally. I left him with the help of women's aid and a local charity when he started showing signs of abuse towards our son.

He has made numerous false allegations about me in court. They are very transparent and have only cropped up after he told CAFCASS he had no concerns.

My allegations towards him are pretty extensive and all true. When I am giving evidence in court I will prove this as the truth is easy to recall

I am terrified of him. Scared I will bump in to him. The whole court process is making me unwell

Any unmumsnetty hand holds?

You are so brave to have made it to here, I will thinking of you come 1 p.m. - imagine us Mumsnetters standing behind you.

Good luck OP, you can do this 💕

You’ve got this, you can do this!

It’s ok to cry the court will be able to tell genuine tears over manipulative ones, they do this day in, day out and won’t mind you crying if you are genuine. Just as long as you are clear and concise you will be just fine.
Remember you’re not the only person who has had to go through this, the court sees so many people everyday they will have experienced most things and honestly you being sick or crying or even fainting wouldn’t faze them at all.

and a handhold.

Another hand hold.

Don't worry about vomiting, tell the clark you are feeling unwell. Do you have anyone physically with you?

You've absolutely got this. We are all cheering you on xo

It's going to be OK. Sending you love and support, you are absolutely awesome. Deep breaths, when asked a question take a pause and a deep breath and answer simply. Your truth will absolutely shine out from his vile lies. Good luck x

My exh lost his cool on the stand.
Didn't do him any favours. Your ex can only hold his facade for so long.
My exh's hatred for me lost him his case tbh.
Maybe yours will go a similar way op....

Hope to have a virtual meet up with later....

Baka - you are so courageous!

I totally understand where you are coming from. I was the victim of a workplace bullying - which isn't a HUNDREDTH of what you have experienced, and I physically could not be in the same room as the person involved without shaking and crying, so I have a small idea of what you are going through.

What you are doing for yourself and your son is incredibly brave. You will get through it and it will be worth every terrifying moment. We are with you. The women's aid people are with you. And believe it or not the court will be with you when they see what this horrible man has done.

Every blessing - and please come back here, if you feel able, to re-live your triumph with us when this is all over.

I just wanted to send you a very unmumsnetty hug too. I cry at inappropriate times, especially when worried or cross, and its really frustrating. I cried when at an employment tribunal, and just couldn't get across what I wanted to say properly. The judge still understood what I was trying to say, and had I been employed by that company for 2 years, I would have won.
I've never been in your position, but I think I would try and think what life will be like for your ds once this is all over, and how you made that happen by showing the courts just how abusive this person was to you both

A unmumsnetty hug from me. I hope it goes well and common sense reigns.

Good luck!

A big hug and a handhold over here OP. Just remember that the courts have seen it all before - every single day. They'll be able to see straight through him no matter how he behaves or what he says. They will know that there will be a reason why you had to leave and it is their job to protect you and your baby from harm. Just be true to yourself and all will be well. Thinking of you. x

Sending courage to you @bakabakabeyond

Good luck and if you wobble just remember who are doing this for, to protect your child.

Wishing you strength

Your bravery will get you through today. If you wobble relax your belly and feel the floor underneath you supporting you. Take your time and state the truth.
You are doing exactly the right thing for you and your son, and by this evening it will be done.

Well done. Sending massive hugs and hand holds. I will be thinking of you at one o’clock today. X

Another hand to hold over here.

Good luck, you can do this, you are strong xx

You are so brave and what a wonderful example for your DC. Handhold here too

Another hand hold and saying a prayer (hope that is OK with you) that you get through to-day safely. You are wonderful and courageous, and we are all supporting you.

Hug from me okay xx

Good luck you are probably in the court by now but if you see this here is a reminder

You are a strong and amazing woman. Your son is so lucky to have a mum who cares about him and protects him and loves him. So lucky to have a mum who is brave and courageous.

Today will be hard but you'll do it for your son. You've come so so far.. one day he will grow up and be very very proud of you

Thinking of you, good luck xxx

Good luck OP, you're doing great.

Hand hold and good luck. I’ve been to family court although not in these circumstances. It is not pleasant but they do their best and they were fair to me.

Be brave, be strong bakabakabeyond.

Justice will prevail:)