To think a class whip round for teacher's Xmas present shouldn't come to £££

[lollapaloser]

My child is in first term of reception class. The class rep asked all parents in the class WhatsApp group if we'd like to contribute to vouchers for a Christmas present for the teacher. I said probably not, I'll just get DS to make or buy a small token something (from him). And wouldn't a group gift be better at the end of the school year?

Anyway, an 'experienced' mum with older children said a £10-£20 contribution per child/family is normal and it's split between the teacher and TA. Given there are 30 children in the class we'd end up with between 300 and 600 quid, which seems bonkers.

Turns out I was in a minority of 1 in thinking it was OTT/tacky/morally wrong. A few people jumped in to say how much the teacher does, caring for our children every day, going above and beyond, how wonderful she is etc. How none of us would think twice about spending £20 on a takeaway. Another said she couldn't get a bottle of wine and chocs for £20 so it's a good deal, plus it saves her time. And that she sometimes also bakes or whatever as well as the donation.

There are just so many things about this I don't agree with. It's the teacher's job, she's not a saint, wouldn't it embarrass her, she'd have to declare it, could it be seen as bribery, I think the parent who suggested we can all chuck £20 away without thinking about it is clueless about most people's finances, I think the thank you should come from the child, not the parents in a grand gesture of performative gratitude, if Teach is so wonderful why wouldn't you go to more effort, larger value doesn't equal greater thanks, if we're raising a big chunk of money wouldn't it be better spent on equipment for the school, etc . . . I could go on.

This is in a (turns out more affluent than I realised) London suburb. Everyone else has responded saying they'd transferred money, mostly a tenner. I know in the grand scheme of things a tenner isn't much but that's not the main point.

I actually emailed the school about this and whether their gifting policy could state a cap on gift amounts. But their reply just said parents can give what they want and that it isn't a policy issue as doesn't affect the children.

I reckon I'm the only one of 30 sets of parents not contributing. I now feel a bit isolated from the group for thinking differently.

My Dd is in yr 3 and we’ve been doing the whip round for vouchers at the end of each year every year. We all chuck in a tenner (although it’s a 5-10 option rather than 10-20 - 20 is mad). There has been a teacher and two TAs so they get £100 voucher each. We all do our own thing at Xmas. But tbh buying an individual card and bottle of wine costs the best part of £10 anyway!

I work in a school now (not teaching) and recently had to fill in a declaration of any donations/ gifts / benefits received, so a £300 gift would have to be declared and kept on my file.
Well I worked in London schools for over 20years and have never heard of that.
I now run a stall selling gently used ‘worlds best teacher’ mugs.

Fairly middle class, affluent area here but also some people struggling. In reception it started as £20 a head donation. Gradual moaning and resistance it's now down to £5 in year 3! I am in two kinds about it. I get it's better for the teacher than a load of crap but I think it does put pressure on people.

*minds

I really like the schools reply to your email.

I kid you not, one year I got dustpan and brushes for the teachers, they couldn't thank me enough, but it was something that was like gold dust to find one.

I would love a voucher for The Works. Ive probably spent £100 in there already this academic year on topic specific books, games and crafty bits that apparently there's no money for in the school budget. Or Amazon, I buy a lot from there for school.

I think all chipping in for a decent gift each for TA and Teacher is a great idea but surely £5 per head is more than adequate. £150 split between two in vouchers. £10-20 is stupidity especially when some families have 3+ children at school

Please remember your class TA is on barley a few pence more than minimum wage. Probably work over
and above their allotted hours. The TA is the one to clean your child up when they have an accident, wipe their tears when they fall over, and worry about your child's progress as they fall asleep at night!
yes I am a TA, love my job, but the wages are shit.

Me again! I can’t get over this post 🤣🤣🤣 “oh we pay £50 plus each on the teachers birthday, they earn a pittance after all!”
Yes I’m sure people like you tip generously just to desperately be able to establish your social standing (it really shows!)
The whole issue with this thread is not about how much is acceptable it’s the peer pressure of it all!
It doesn’t matter if you choose to spend £15 to make some cupcakes that’s your choice. But the whole Mummy mafia pressurising other parents to contribute a set amount is another issue! It totally takes the sentiment out of it.

£10 once a year is not unreasonable!

There used to be a rule a least in state run schools AGAINST buying presents for the teacher. This was stop a competition to see who could impress the most, and to relieve precisely this sort of pressure on those who could least afford it. I suggest you remind everyone of this policy and ask what happened to it.

Unless yours is a private institution in which case you can afford it.

I used to hate all this buy the teacher a present shit when mine were at junior school. All competitive and ridiculous. I agree with the OP, the teacher, however good and dedicated, is doing her job. How many of you buy a present in Tesco when you see that police officer or paramedic buying their lunch, or the butcher when you collect your sausages, the check out person at Tesco?

I’m in a fairly affluent area but in Northern Ireland. We had a collection last year but it was done so that you could chip in whatever you wanted and donations were anonymous. This year I’ve taken up the organising and so far everyone has given £10 or £15 but only I can see that as its through my paypal. Ours is to split between two teachers (job share) and a classroom assistant so even if we got 300 (which I doubt we will as not everyone is in WhatsApp group and not everyone will want to contribute to a present) it won’t be a vast amount of money between 3 of them. I’m in favour of it because a) I’d be hard pressed to buy a card and a present for each of them (or even one of them) for £10 and b) one of my best friends is a teacher and I’ve had several occasions of watching her bring home Xmas/summer presents which she divided into stuff she couldn’t use (allergies to most fragrance stuff), was as some has said before ‘best teacher’ mugs we she could’ve filled the cupboards with and chocolate and wine which she could use. Whilst she didn’t expect anything her fave present was always vouchers. I don’t think anyone should be obliged to contribute nor told what amount to put in and I don’t think children should be singled out in a card for not contributing but I do think you should be glad someone else is sorting it if you intended to contribute anyway!!!

That's way too much money fir a gift. You can get little token gifts in supermarkets for under £5.
Home baked things will just be thrown away through. No matter how naice the family are.

Annie - That is truly lovely!

School I work at has advised no gifts to staff as a part of the Cost of the School Day (Scotland) exercise.

Ngl, we give £10 at my kids’ school. I think it’s great because a) it saves me money b) it saves me the bother and c) the teacher gets an excellent present! I see it as a win-win personally 😀

I'm with the parent who says that you wouldn't be able to buy an bottle of wine and a box of chocolates for that kind of money. I think it's a good idea and it saves the faff of buying something. Plus the teacher gets something nice which I think they do deserve with bells on.

@Judemahmoodid

FIFTY QUID!

Are you on Prittstick?

Completely agree with candy.

@Toomuchtrouble4me

except it does affect the children, the ones whose parents cannot contribute

yep teachers pay for stuff out of their own pockets. they are also paid a professional sa

Mixed.

I don't think most people realise how poorly TAs are paid and fairly new teachers. TAs don't make much above minimum wage....

@Ihatemyseleffordoingthis well said!!