McDonald’s isn’t a ‘treat’

[Busybeebeebee]

I’ll try and keep this simples.

Both my sons go to their dad alternate weekends Friday 4pm- Sunday 3pm.
On a Friday when he picks them up, they go to McDonald’s for tea.
Saturday they tend to go somewhere like Brewers Fayre which although is marginally better still processed chicken crap with fries and a token corn on the cob.
Sunday it’s back to McDonald’s for lunch.

He genuinely sees no issue with this.

AIBU?

YABU - yes, all kids like McDonald’s and twice in a weekend is fine.

YANBU - cooking something decent for growing kids twice a fortnight isn’t difficult!

Don’t get me wrong, in an emergency I would stop and grab them something in McDonald’s but I can’t get my head around it being something to get excited about. 4 shitty nuggets, tiny portion of fries and a milkshake. They don’t even like the toys.

I hold my hands up, I’m not a food nazi or anything like that, I just genuinely am astounded.

Piss poor parenting. No way would I accept this

What would you do? Serious question.

Well, McDonalds should be a one-off treat, but a regular meal there is not a "treat" in any way shape or form. It's just regular junk food. It's nothing else than lazy.

So two weekends a month but the rest of the time with you they eat healthier food?
realistically, I doubt the kids will eat healthy food the rest of the time though. I might be wrong, but in general kids
-have school diners (that do not qualify as "healthy food"!)
-have parties
-have sleepovers

so end up eating a lot of crap in a "normal" diet, and that's even when their parents cook healthy meals at home.

It's also ridiculously unfair on the OP who has to be the bad guys and feed her kids healthy food they might not prefer, as opposed to the ex who plays the Disney dad and feeds them rubbish for a peaceful life.

Not a big deal in my opinion. The kids will get to the point where they are sick of having McDonalds and probably ask him for something different. Sadly I have extended family members who feed their children takeaways 5 out of 7 days per week . Now that’s concerning!

Well it's not ideal and pretty lazy parenting. Also it impacts on you being able to take them for similar.

Ugh, does he make any effort with the kids otherwise?

Once a week is actually fine as a pp said, but 3 unhealthy meals is rubbish parenting assuming they dint have any needs nor food refusal issues. (I say this as someone who loves a cheeky mcdonalds).

Hes just being lazy. Have you mentioned it to him?

Disney dad syndrome with a big dollop of lazy arseness.

I wouldn't be happy with the high salt and sugar content of those processed foods he buys your children.

On the plus side if he's claiming to earn 10k A MONTH via his 'personal training' business - You should have a healthy amount of maintenance OP?

I think it should be treat - but it isn’t in this case. My DS is only 18 months so haven’t actually taken him yet, but when I do it would be a treat, for me and him! I love McDonalds, but only get one maybe twice a year or so. And there’s a difference between a ‘treat’ and ‘cba to ever cook for my kids’. It’s sad that ‘McDonalds dad’ has actually become a phrase to describe dads that only see their kids at weekends, but it is apt and fitting in many cases it seems.

That's him trying to be cool fun Dad rather than thinking about the content of the food.

YANBU

How would he react if you asked him if he could 'lay off the junk food a bit this weekend'?

It's not ideal but I would let it lie. Unless you can't let it lie in which case phone him and yell "UVAVU!" and award him nil points.

Macdonald's or similar once a month after school for a treat for doing well at school. Your poor boys must be sick and feel sick after all that stodge

I’m by no means a crazy anti McDonalds health advocate - quite the opposite - but I’m quite surprised at all the people on here saying a McDonalds once a week is the norm maybe once a month or every other month, if you live close to one. And is that on top of other meals out and takeaways? There are other places to eat

@HowlsMovingBungalow to be fair to him he does pay the correct maintenance (which I guess he would say pays towards the healthy food I provide!)

I love a McDonald’s but do I eat it every week nope! I wouldn’t be happy with my kids eating it twice a week nope!!

YANBU. It's lazy parenting, but unless he's going to listen to your suggestions of 'easy dinners' instead, I'm not too sure what you can do about it, especially if you're civil with each other and co parenting smoothly. As a pp said, it could be a lot worse, putting it into the perspective of 4 days per month, and them having a healthy diet the rest of the time.

I thought this was going to be another McDonalds rant and I was set to YABU but twice for two days and out somewhere else to eat on the third day he has them. Can he not cook? Anything? What does he eat every day? YANBU.

My kids see it as a bit of a treat but they only go a few times a year. Twice in a weekend is too much and must get boring.

McDonald's is a treat, i.e. something nice, for a lot of people. You mightn't find it enjoyable, but many do.

Having said that, the whole point of a treat in a child's (or adult's) diet is it's not all the time. IMO, McD's on a Friday and a meal out on the Saturday is fine, but he shouldn't get them McD's on the Sunday as well.

@JusticeForSandra '-have school diners (that do not qualify as "healthy food"!)'

School dinners aren't so bad, especially nowadays, well maybe it's sometimes vile IDK, but it's fairly nutritious and a meal.

Nothing you can do. Unless you are on okay terms when you could suggest a meal and kids help out to make pizzas or something?

It is really tedious having to be the parent who does all the core important stuff and Dad just treats. So understand. It’s not parenting is it.

Don't think i could get worked up about this. As long as they are active enough and you are cooking decent meals

i don't see it as a big deal, yabu for me

I would be starting the “McDonalds is shit” message going because, come on, it’s not healthy and it’s not even that nice.

In our house McDonalds has always been a very cheap lunch when there are no alternatives, (when there are six of you it can get expensive). Never a treat.

I suspect you’ll have more chance if your kids start voicing objections than if you do.

Basically what this means is that in order for your dcs to eat well, you need to cook daily and go out rarely. Not even together anymore as so often happens, you’re still doing the wife work. Lazy and pretty rubbish all round

This. ^^
I personally don't think 2 McDonalds and a Brewers Fair each week is terrible (I have a selective eater so my standards are low). But they get all the treat food on his time.
Poor OP probably feels like at pains to "make up for it".

So he's a personal trainer now?

I think I'd be dropping in an anecdote about 'someone' asking you in horror does he really feed his children junk food for every meal he has them - 'By the way you might want to start trying to find a MaccyD's a bit further out Ex, I've had yet ANOTHER person commenting on how surprising it is to see a trainer being happy to feed their own kids junk every time they see them. You're going to get a repuatation as the McTrainer if you're not careful!'

Hes lazy. Eating out 3 times in 3 days? Too much. Once in the weekend would be enough imo.

Have you posted about this issue before? I’ve read a similar issue some months back.