We have three teenage dcs. Christmas is going to be tight this year. Oldest dc is at uni and we've had to supplement his loan, youngest dc has moved to private school (SEN). Just had to pay a huge car breakdown bill. So we aren't on the breadline which makes this decision harder, but for the next few years money is going to be really really tight.
Every year I put 10 in a card for my brothers who are both over 30, unmarried, no kids. Give my dsis a gift card (25) and buy my parents things from m and s with a gift receipt so they can return. My mum is really fussy and used to make a huge drama if people bought her things that she thought were 'weird', hence the reciept. Ususally spend about 50 or 60 on parents.I have one niece who I like to spend about 30 on.
One year I suggested buying for kids only, but my siblings got arsey because they have one dc between them (my niece) and I have 3. My parents also thought I was mean for not putting the 10 in the card for my brothers.
My mum always buys me something like a cheap toilertry set that i don't want or need, and gives the dds £10 each, which I do think is a bit tight but they dont have much money either.
I had an awful childhood although ive moved on from that now but i barely see my parents so the whole thing seems hollow. They refuse to travel to see us (we're near Birmingham they are just east of London).
My dsis is an alcoholic which she's trying to cope with but this year she's sent me some really quite nasty texts which have upset me so my contact with her is minimal. I'd love to spend a bit more on her dd, my niece. Last year dsis was so drunk and skint she didnt get my dds anything which was fine, she was in a bad place. However she did say to them she'd get them something in the new year and just never did despite getting herself botox.
Sorry this is long and rambling.
Dh says just be firm and say kids only.
Wwyd and aibu?