To ask how many hours your DP spends playing videos games

[Cchick]

Just what the title says really.

My partner spends maybe 15-20 hours a week on average (sometimes he can spend 12 full hours!) and I was wondering how many your partners spend. I mean he's playing the games with other people, so is this normal in other households too?

FYI, we don't have any children yet and we aren't married yet. I'm just very worried that if we do marry and have kids, the family would come second to gaming. Everyone says to look out for red flags and I'm wondering if this is one?

Long story short, how many hours do your partners spend gaming and has it reduced since marrying and having children?

TIA!

DH is 70 and retired, probably spends 4 hours a day gaming. He has played games since home computers were invented. When he worked and when DC were young he didn't have much free time but still played to wind down. It's his hobby and as long as it doesn't take priority over the family it's fine.

Enormous salary or not - I think many many hours gaming with children is a little ‘young’.

So fucking rude to imply adults can't play video games. Adults can have fun too 🙃 mine spends about 3 hours a week atm. We used to play a lot together pre kids (30+ hours a week together) but I don't have the enthusiasm for it now. Maybe a couple of hours a month for me.

Zero. He has never gamed. But tbh I wouldn’t be married to him if he was a gamer. It’s a massive turn off for me on so many levels and we would be incompatible.

Btw OP that sounds like a lot. That’s a lot of time to be sedentary.

1/2h a night when DD is in bed and he isn't working. Doesn't bother me as I like having space to chill and do my own thing and he's always spilt her evening routine with me if he isn't working late, so neither of us feel hard done by.

Zero but he watches a lot of TV.

Lots, it's our way of unwinding, we love to play together but also play seperatly, never comes in the way of stuff we need to be doing.

The sneery not he's an adults thing is ridiculous.

There are some very snotty attitudes to gaming here.

Just like films, tv and books there are some great games and some utter dross.

My DH doesn’t play all that often, which given that he built an arcade machine from the ground up (literally from wood and wiring), is quite surprising.

None because he is a grown up who doesn’t ‘play’.

Mine spends a couple of evenings a week gaming, we have a child but as long as he continues being a great dad and boyfriend it's fine. He's always been a serious gamer and has his own room but I still get time with him. I tell him if it ever gets too much 😊 Most people have a hobby but I don't think it should take over your life

Gosh theres some judgey attitudes on here. What is wrong with adults gaming?

I was going to say zero - Dh has an xbox but rarely goes on it, but he does play a lot of games on his phone which is probably easily 3+ hours a day. I play games on my phone too and I'm middle aged with 4 dc.

"None because he is a grown up who doesn’t ‘play"

Zzzzz 😴😴😴

1-2 hours a month on consoles, but he does play a lot of games on his phone.

I don't mind - it means I get to hog the remote!

Maybe two hours once a year when he goes home and there's football manager. Because he's not a teenager.

Two hours on football manager would advance you about a month in a simulated football season. So it takes him about 9 years to finish one season.

Are you sure about that?

I have a ds who’s a gamer.. I imagine he’ll date / marry a girl who also games.. 🤷‍♀️

I don’t see any harm in adults gaming, whatever you enjoy, it’s just, for me, a turn off as I associate gaming with memories of being a teenager and of teenage boys thinking I’d be impressed (I wasn’t) with an evening spent gaming in their smelly bedrooms instead of going out.

None because he is a grown up who doesn’t ‘play’.

So anyone who participates in sport is a child then, by that logic. Being as they're 'playing a game' and all that.

The only childish behaviour here is coming from the smug posters.

I have no idea why people put up with this from grown men with families.

I can answer that. Because it has zero negative impact on me or our children and therefore I think it would be incredibly controlling of me to demand that he stop doing it.

None. Wouldn’t want to be with a man child who gamed all the time.

0 hours but I wish he did as I'd play too, I'd absolutely love one of them headset things!

Zero, I would not find it attractive for a man to game.

None at the moment. He has an xbox but I can't remember the last time it was switched on.

The joke in our house is that he thinks about having a play, but it takes so long to download all the updates on the rare occasion he fancies having a play he gets bored before its ready to play and doesn't bother.

He made noises about buying a new game the other day that had just come out but when he realised the game was £50 and his online subscription also needed renewing he decided it wasn't spending not far off £100 to be able to play the game.

Dh plays a few hours a day, maybe 30 hours a week.
He also works full time, cooks dinner most nights, does childcare, laundry, housework, etc. All the things an adult does, he does more of the household tasks than I do tbh.
We spend most of our evenings together, but each doing our own things in the same room, so I'm marking/planning while he's playing games on his pc, and the TV is on as well. The games don't take over our life any more than my work takes over our life. He picks up a lot of the slack while I'm working so I don't begrudge him some relaxation time (plus I play games on my phone, how is it any different?)

For those comparing gaming to reading and films/tv... I don’t watch films or tv but I do read. Reading is very different to gaming. It nurtures creativity and enhances imagination, learning, knowledge and vocabulary. It also is very relaxing, doesn’t emit blue light or suppress melatonin and promotes sleep and reduces stress hormones. It’s good for you. I don’t think you could say the same for gaming, even if you like it.