To ask how people 'accidentally' get pregnant?

[Butterflyone12e]

I honestly do wonder how people say they fell pregnant by accident. Of course I can understand the horrific situation if sexual abuse/rape was involved but do people honestly fall accidentally pregnant?

I'm 33 years of age and have never fallen pregnant because I've not wanted to fall pregnant.

I wondered what peoples stories are. I really disagree with terminations (again unless medial or abuse).

Maybe OP never got pregnant accidentally because it's actually very difficult for many people? Just a glance at the conception boards show that even if you have perfectly timed sex with every lifestyle change, some people will still struggle to conceive. It seems impossible to take credit for contraception "skill" when nobody knows how easy you can conceive by default.

When we were having fertility issues and I thought we'd never get there I made quite a few 'jokes' about the money I'd wasted on unnecessary morning-after pills over the years. I spent my 20s absolutely paranoid that I'd get pregnant from the slightest slip-up so really thought I'd get pregnant the very first time in my whole life that I had unprotected sex. Two years later...

I would say a lot are just unplanned pregnancy from not following contraceptive guideline 100% human error and maybe inexperienced. Then there are complete accidents that couldn't be avoided but in reality are probably quite rare. My first unplanned I would say. But I would say inexperience also. I was on the pill and I was sick for about a week really bad. I got pregnant. I worked out 4 weeks after I was last sick. I had sex when I was better but obviously my body not quite 100%. My midwife said it only takes a pill to go through your system too fast and not work. Now I always take extra precautions!

All I've got to do is look at a cock and ill be pregnant 🤰

Speaking for myself only, I would describe some of my pregnancies as "accidental" but I know deep down I wasn't as conscientious about contraception as I should have been. Hormonal contraception doesn't suit me and I found using condoms a complete bore when in LTR.

I wouldn't presume to speak for anyone else though and I do think this thread is a bit judgmental and smug.

@Cherrybathbomb

In my mum's case- being told that having a broken pelvis & internal scarring from an accident means you'll never sustain a pregnancy. Makes you less careful ... like failure to insert your diaphragm less careful.

Best friends mum's case: husband dying & supposedly left sterile by treatment was not as sterile as they thought.

You are wrong about duration of fertility.

It's not just a few days. You can be fertile for ten days.

Sperm can remain viable up to five days in the female reproductive tract. (Not health class scaremongering.) If you have sex up to five days before ovulation you could become pregnant. You have up to a 7% chance of pregnancy five days before ovulation.

...........
A lot of women do not have the agency about the conditions in which they conduct their relationships that you assume, Butterflyone.

They become pregnant because their partners insist a baby is a sign of loyalty or commitment.
They become pregnant because their partners have lied about a condom.
They become pregnant because they fear loss of a relationship if they take a contraceptive initiative themselves or insist on male contraception, and they are conditioned to value keeping a man over their own best interests.

I got pregnant on Week 10 of Depo Provera which was supposed to cover you for 12 weeks.

@Butterflyone12e perhaps you have been lucky? Perhaps you don’t know you have fertility issues? You can’t ask a question like that and not expect a few irritated reactions.
I was told I couldn’t have children due to a life long condition worsening. I got pregnant.
Just because you haven’t got pregnant accidentally, it doesn’t mean it can’t happen. Cycles vary, contraception fails and some people trust what the surgeon tells them when they say they won’t get pregnant.

@Bluerussian Thank you! It turned out very well!

I have pcos, and before I fell Pg with dd1 I had only had 6 periods in my entire life (6 years after my first, so am average of one a year). We did use condoms, but to be fair, seeing as I knew I wasn't ovulating regularly, I wasn't as bothered by the odd condom mishap as I could have been. It took me 18 weeks and a small bump before I even noticed I was pg (my clothes stopped doing up). It was an incredibly unlikely pregnancy, as it was the first time I'd ovulated in about 18 months, and only one condom split that I knew of, but it happened somehow. Dd1 is now an adult.

Dd2 was planned, but we required help to get Pg that time. We were told it was very unlikely we would get pg naturally due to my my pcos (no periods), but not impossible (obviously as I'd already had dd1).

18 months after dd2 was born I fell pg naturally again. I'd only had one period since she was born, partly pcos, partly breastfeeding. That ended in miscarriage. I count that as an accidental pregnancy as we weren't trying at all, and we'd been told it was incredibly unlikely to ever happen. Funnily enough, since that pregnancy and miscarriage, I've had regular periods for 9 years, not used contraception at all, and have only had one pregnancy scare (turned out to be a medication issue rather than actually being pg). We've been very, very lax with contraception, happy to have another baby if it happens but not ttc. Nothing. Just luck, if I'd been using contraception I might have been congratulating myself for being so safe, but I haven't, so I'm obviously just not very fertile currently.

I took the morning after pill and it failed. Baby due in a couple of weeks!

I was 33 and had never been pregnant, didn’t want kids, ever. Took my pill religiously. Seems my partner has supersperm who can hypnotise my ovaries into compliance. By 34 I had my daughter. Ironically it took many years of trying for number two to come along off contraception & was told it probably would never happen again.

Shit happens. If I hadn’t accidentally got pregnant while on the pill I’d still be child free now. Kinda glad I’m not.

Are babies conceived through abused or medical less babies? If it's ok to terminate them why is it less ok for other reasons?

Mostly, it's a case of "We'll get away with it this once".

Ooops, no you don't.

All four of my kids tbh.

@MangoSalsa I'll be sure to take a frer tomorrow morning.

My first was conceived while I was on the pill. To say I was shocked would be an understatement- I knew that, of course, no type of contraception is 100% effective but I was still completely shocked. When I went to see the GP to be referred to the midwives he asked how I was feeling about the pregnancy so I told him I was on the pill and just couldn’t believe it. He said contraceptive failures happen far more than people think and didn’t seem surprised.
Sometimes I think people also may decide to ‘see how it goes’ and don’t consciously try for a baby as in they don’t track ovulation etc then fall pregnant very quickly so say the baby was a surprise and I understand what they mean by that.

I have been pregnant 17 times every form of contraception has failed. I even got pregnant when I was pregnant

@DustyMaiden

I fell pregnant taking the POP absolutely 100% correctly. So it can happen. Sadly I had a mc early on. It is fact that no contraception is 100% reliable so although failures are relatively rare, they still occur.

Me and my SIL both fell pregnant while on the pill, the morning after pill also failed for me.

The way we are told to take the pill makes it less effective. Stop blaming women.
theconversation.com/contraception-the-way-you-take-the-pill-has-more-to-do-with-the-pope-than-your-health-109392

What a ridiculous question. Please get a life.

biscuit

HTH

Never really understood the 'HTH' end to a rude(ish) post. Is it just a sarcastic way of saying fuck off / putting a poster in their place?

We had a condom failure followed by a morning after pill failure. I was in utter shock. Wouldn't change it now but at the time I wasn't very happy about it 😁

I'll ignore the abortion thing, but on the whole, I have also wondered this about so called accidents. I get that contraception fails but realistically the chance of that happening is around 1%, whereas the number of women with "accidents" seems much higher.

I inwardly roll my eyes when someone tells me they had an "surprise" pregnancy, usually followed by a disingenuous comment like "Oh I must just be super fertile".
I fell pregnant within 6 weeks of no contraception (it was intentional), it's an entirely natural and predictable consequence of unprotected sex, you're not special. Obviously these people have either not bothered with birth control or used it wrong so how can it be a surprise they're pregnant? I think deep down they've wanted a baby so haven't been very strict about preventing it.

PS once we decided to continue with the pregnancy I sae my doctor because I was worried the Map may have caused problems. She wasn't at all surprised I was pregnant despite taking it so obviously not uncommon. And in response to a PP - the reason the conception boards make it appear as thought it is difficult for all women to get pregnant is because those woman finding it hard to get pregnant post there. Not those of us who have accidentally found themselves expecting! Also to a PP, the reason this thread makes it look as though a higher percentage of MN readers have accidental pregnancies is because that's what the thread is about. Therefore it's going to attract those who have experienced this.