To ask how people 'accidentally' get pregnant?

[Butterflyone12e]

I honestly do wonder how people say they fell pregnant by accident. Of course I can understand the horrific situation if sexual abuse/rape was involved but do people honestly fall accidentally pregnant?

I'm 33 years of age and have never fallen pregnant because I've not wanted to fall pregnant.

I wondered what peoples stories are. I really disagree with terminations (again unless medial or abuse).

I got pregnant with my third son accidentally. We used condoms, 100% correctly, 100% of the time. We never noticed it split. I suffer fairly badly with morning sickness so it wasn’t long before I knew though.

I do think however, a lot of people who accidentally get pregnant are just using contraception incorrectly, in which case i wouldn’t say accidentally. My first son was unplanned, but also un prevented. I wasn’t on the pill, I knew I could get pregnant if I had unprotected sex, but after a night of tequila and a massive dose of naivity ‘it won’t happen to us’...along came our beautiful, fantastic eldest son!

Because shit happens? My ex walked out on me literally 36 hours after unprotected sex. I had the mind in all the distress to get the MAP but it didn’t work. So not an accident as such as I fully admit to willingly having unprotected sex. I tried to deal with the consequences but that didn’t happen. So I had a child as a single parent through circumstances. Wouldn’t have had unprotected sex had I known he was walking.

@swingofthings of course this post isn’t representative of the real world though, because by the very nature of mumsnet it attracts those who are pregnant.
It’s like going on an elvis Presley fan site and using the number of people who like elvis as the percentage of people who like elvis in the whole country. Not gonna work is it?!

Literally on the pill. It didn't work! I was on a low dose one, and my Dr unsurprisingly hasn't let me be on that one since.

Not read whole thread but I think using two forms makes things much safer

I got pregnant with dc3 whilst on the pill and using condoms. My period stopped and it was assumed I had a thyroid issue. I went along to the hospital to be told I was having a baby!

Am a bit worried about the state of sex education in this country, given the number of people who apparently think contraception is 100% reliable as long as you’re not lazy/drunk/trying to sneakily get pregnant anyway. Whatever method you’re using has a failure rate unless it’s total abstinence.

Broken condom, morning after pill, still pregnant!

Where there’s a willy there’s a way

My Gran once wisely told me ' dear I have had sex by mistake but never by accident'

I've seen so many posters sneered at called dishonest on MN for saying that their unplanned pregnancy was a contraception failure. It's good to see so many now acknowledging that it happens relatively often.

For example to the previous things I've seen on here more than a few times, a woman in a less than ideal relationship makes a post panicking because she's discovered that she's pregnant, then posters come in asking "why on earth did you make a child with this man"

Poster responds that the baby was a contraception failure and posters respond with disbelief.

This does happen. I know somebody personally who fell pregnant on what is usually highly effective contraception. Nothing is totally fail safe unfortunately.

PS the abortion comment was unnecessary.

Yes protection when used appropriately will stop, what, 97-98% pregnancies?... but then you consider all the people having sex, (hint it’s quite a few) then of course you will have unplanned pregnancies.

(Even when you consider the fact that these contraceptive failures have to occur when the women has ovulated, because, yeah, tons of people are at it )

Weird to congratulate yourself that it’s never happened to you.

Ibiza2015

The same friend (nurse) encounters women on a daily basis who claim their pregnancy was ‘accidental’ despite; not actually using any contraception- not using it ‘every time’- not using it as instructed AND purposely sabotaging it! *

Why is your friend breaking strict NHS guidelines by gossiping to you about her patients?

^ @Ibiza2015 are you serious?
Of course medical professionals can chat about things they encounter. Telling someone who it was and any other identifying information is not.

OP, why phrase the title 'accidental'?

It just comes across as goady straight away.

Also, you should feel free to ask whatever you choose on MN but you can also use NHS guidance:

www.nhs.uk/conditions/contraception/how-effective-contraception/

Walnut 🤣🤣

Well I forgot to get my coil replaced. DC3 incredibly unplanned but very loved.

Jesus. I was 43 when I fell pregnant for the first/last/only time. I'd always thought I was infertile and had spent pretty much my whole life on and off having unprotected sex. I was shocked beyond belief!!

We'd had IVF ICSI for our first due to severe male factor infertility. Obviously dropped all forms of birth control after our first baby was born. Even the doctor told us that with that severity, we could ttc for twenty years and nothing would happen. That's how DS2 came to be, 14 months after DS1 was born. A complete surprise and very much unplanned.

Antibiotics for chest infection, nearly 40 years ago, no internet, doctor didn't bother telling me my contraceptive pill was compromised. I was only 18. Subsequent pregnancy ended in miscarriage. You're a fucking insensitive ill informed tool op. Go and troll some place else.

I was apparently infertile but I took the pill (granted somewhat haphazardly) anyway. I had spent the previous 10 years having unprotected sex with my then partner, hence the "infertile" label. I was never investigated due to my age and because I wasn't officially ttc.
Biggest shock of my life was a positive pregnancy test. So much so I took 12 in a day just to be sure!
It happens. It's not intentional but it happens.

I've never been accidentally pregnant but have had some scares:
1st time having sex found the condom hard to put on, he "put it on" behind me, didn't realise till afterwards he never put it on and because I'd never done it before didn't know the difference in feeling.
2nd time I was having sex with a man who was struggling to finish with a condom on, I was weak willed, didn't respect myself very much and wanted the experience over with, he was older and told me there was no way I could get pregnant if he pulled out (of course that isn't true but then again 30 seconds later he didn't pull out anyway).
3rd time I had been diagnosed with pcos and after misunderstanding my doctor I thought I was infertile (he meant if I was trying to get pregnant I would probably need help not you can't ever get pregnant on your own) I was with my now fiancee we had both been checked for STDs so thought I could go without a condom. Later realised that wasn't true.
Then there was the time I was raped but I guess then I would have been permitted a termination.

Don't be too smug OP. I was in your position at 33. I started to ttc at 34. It took us three years and four rounds of ivf to have a successful pregnancy. No reason why - our infertility was "unexplained". So my lack of accidental pregnancy probably had very little to do with my careful use of contraception.

Me and OH had (a lot of) unprotected sex for 5 years before I got pregnant. We were actually considering going to the doctors and ask for help and check what's going on.

She wasn't planned, but she wasn't "prevented" either. My last period was in November (my yearly one) and she was conceived in April.

We knew a baby could happen and we were ok with that, but I can also see how someone in the same situation might believe they're infertile and consider it an accident.

We still joke we have no idea how she happened.

Maybe OP never got pregnant accidentally because it's actually very difficult for many people? Just a glance at the conception boards show that even if you have perfectly timed sex with every lifestyle change, some people will still struggle to conceive. It seems impossible to take credit for contraception "skill" when nobody knows how easy you can conceive by default.

In our early days of dating, DH and I had a condom break which happened surprisingly easily. I wasn't as lubricated down there and there were a few seconds of "dryish" friction and that was enough to tear a hole through it. We checked afterwards by filling it with water and then marched off to the pharmacy for the MAP.

Later on I used the rhythm & basal body temp method which is obviously not reliable but we didn't mind the idea of kids. I got to know my cycle very well and knew exactly which days were fertile. When we DTD on peak days, I go pregnant twice but unfortunately both ended in miscarriage. So bafflingly, the cycle where I actually got pregnant with DD, we only had sex on an entirely random day 4-5 days before ovulation. It must have been a case of sperm surviving for a week inside the body which I always thought was health class scaremongering.

I used to believe in the "6-12 hour window" of being able to get pregnant after ovulation, though now I have a healthy respect for how accidentally it could happen. All the stories here of women getting pg on the coil is making me anxious because that's what I'm planning to get to make sure DD stays an only child!

@Butterflyone12e I was like you, got to 35, had never fell pregnant because I didn't want to. No need for unplanned pregnancy, surely? Came off contraception. Took 2.5 years to fall pregnant. Not what I expected.

Had baby. Went on mini pill. We breast feeding. Had sex once. Literally once, in 12 months. While on the pill. Fell pregnant. So yeah, it does happen. I didn't take the MAP because, well I was on the pill. Breastfeeding. And had taken 2.5 years to get pregnant the first time!

Nottalotta, I have to say congratulations! That really is wonderful - or it ended wonderfully.

Blimey, two lots of nappies!