Relocation to San Francisco

[Lizbiz89]

My oh has been approached for a job in San Francisco. It's kind of come out of the blue which has shocked me slightly. We have 2 young children (2.7 and 6 month).

I'm obviously trying to be very open minded about it but I'm very hesitant. Mainly because we have a lot of family/friends close by which we will lose being so far away.

However on the other hand San Francisco is a lovely part of the world and I feel like my children may have a better lifestyle growing up in a warmer climate and beaches close by.

Does anyone have any experience of moving to the US? Would love to hear other people's opinions and experiences.

For comparison - this is what we pay after tax for some general living costs approximately

Rent - standard 3 bed 2 bath house - 1800 square feet - $5500 per month

Food - weekly food shop $300 for family of four plus monthly Costco shop of $500 - $1700 per month

Internet and tv - $220 per month

Cell phones (family plan with overseas calling) - $280 per month

Electricity and gas - $80 in summer / $350 per month in winter

Water - $150 per month (can go up to $400 per month in summer if watering garden)

Garbage and recycling - $80 per quarter

Health insurance contribution - about $400 per month (depends on your plan with your employer)

Children's allowance $50 each per month - $100

Gas/petrol - $90 per week per car - two cars $720 per month

Gardening man - $150 per month

Housekeeper (4 hours per week) - $600 per month

School contribution (public/government schools) are voluntary but they suggest $1500 per student per year - $250 per month

Hope this helps

Gosh LadyBrienne - that's confirmed for me that we made the right choice to stay where we are on the east coast.

Housing - including mortgage, property tax and insurance on a 3000 square foot house - $2000

Food - weekly food shop $250 for family of 4-5

Internet and tv - $65 per month internet plus we have Netflix and Hulu

Cell phones - $250 per month for 5 people, unlimited data

Electricity and gas - up to $350 a month in winter but usually much lower

Water - $30 per month

Garbage and recycling - $25 per year

Health insurance contribution - about $800 per month plus $6000 deductible per year - all taken out of pre-tax income so effectively about 30% cheaper

Gas/petrol - $40 per week per car

No gardener or cleaner but we do pay about $100 per month in winter for snow ploughing

No school contribution any more, but when DD was at boarding school it cost us $9k per year

It's amazing how costs vary across the country.

So that's about $10,360 per month give or take a bit after tax so that's about $15520 before tax per month

So you need to gross about $185,000 per year just to live here and that's without dining out, savings, clothes or spending month

Obviously there's a lot of subjectivity - but you get where I'm going

@HoldMyLobster yes we do live in the heart of Silicon Valley so it is stupid expensive - I dream about living elsewhere in the USA but can't at present

Just to add this little bit of data to give some context for how expensive SF is:

sfgov.org/scorecards/safety-net/poverty-san-francisco

I think you are right to see what the package is before you make any decisions or not.

@HoldMyLobster @LadyBrienne I honesty cannot believe the difference between east and west coast! The east coast is about what we pay here (Warwickshire UK).

@LadyBrienne that break down of costs is unbelievable helpful. I will let my oh know when he gets home as we've been trying to work out monthly living costs etc.

We are in the Midwest and our living costs are very similar to @LadyBrienne
I'm not yet cleared for working so don't have a cleaner.

I honesty cannot believe the difference between east and west coast

I'm not even sure it's an east coast/west coast thing. We live outside commuting reach from any major cities which makes things a lot cheaper. New York, Boston, Philly, etc I'll bet would all be much more expensive to live in - especially if you're looking for a good school district.

@HoldMyLobster completely agree. I guess if you live further out from major cities you'll be paying less. I did a quick google though and New York and San Francisco are the two most expensive places to live in the US. Again all relative depending on what salary you're on.

Just to confirm we live in a major city, so we have lots of positives but it does cost more.

obviously the exchange rate doesn't help

@Lizbiz89 does your DH already work for that company ? If it's the one I think there are certain things to know before moving half way around the world that are relevant (having been there for 8 years)

this was 15 years or so ago. Only speaking from our experience. The 'Accidental american' issue has been quite a big one in the news in europe of late. French, Dutch families etc having problems because of either the birth of a child in the US, or the fact that the child has a US father. DD has already had forms sent from her bank so is aware. We're just waiting til next summer to do something about it because she's up to her neck in final year dissertations etc right now. And as for the right to work there, well it wasn't a problem for my OH. If you have the skills, the companies will want you. And I too managed to do some freelance work (albeit for a british employer). Clearly its a choice. You have made yours, and we have made ours!

@LadyBrienne no he currently works for another major car manufacturer in the UK. Do you know how I might be able to pm you? Then we can go into more detail.

You want to make sure that relocation costs back to UK are covered in the contract.
USA employment law has very few protection rights for employees in some states.
Your visa is dependent on a specific job so if you lose the job you have to leave the country very quickly.
You don't want to have to cover the costs of that.

no he currently works for another major car manufacturer in the UK

So he's being headhunted by another company that he doesn't currently work for? That means you won't be going on an L visa. Are you looking at an O or H visa do you know?

I love SF but personally I wouldn't go without having the right to work independent of my DPs work visa.

I know someone who was forced to leave their kids in the US as the exDH wouldn't let the children leave and she had no legal right to live or work there once they were divorced. She's still trying to get back on a more permanent basis but it's been 2 years now.