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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask supporters of porn to read this

608 replies

SmileEachDay · 29/10/2019 16:25

meaww.com/missing-teen-adult-video-pornhub-modelhub-snapchat-periscope

A missing 15 year old girl was spotted in videos hosted by Pornhub. Those of you who are “ok” with porn - are you “ok” with this?

The sentence the man involved in making the videos is for another thread, but is shocking.

OP posts:
JAPAB · 30/10/2019 20:26

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

BertrandRussell · 30/10/2019 20:29

JAPAB has form on this subject. His views are deeply repellent..
Oh, and I am not assuming his sex. He has said he is a man before.

PencilsInSpace · 30/10/2019 20:30

I've been here nearly 10 years and this is the first time I have ever wished for a hide poster button.

BertrandRussell · 30/10/2019 20:33

JAPAB also thinks that porn gives women participating in it the opportunity to explore their sexuality. Oh, and ReanimatedSGB is a pornographer.

JAPAB · 30/10/2019 20:41

BertrandRussell actually it was another poster who said that, and was just stating her own observations.

ReanimatedSGB · 30/10/2019 21:32

Pencils: people who support or produce ethical porn agree with this - that Mindgeek/Pornhub is a dangerous monopoly. But their directors' greed and contempt for those who provide them with content is no more a symptom of the Evils of Porn than Uber's mistreatment of 'self-employed' drivers is an indictment of car use. People get so obsessed with the idea that other people percieve and enjoy sex in different ways that they miss the crucial point: exploitation occurs in many industries and the way to reduce or get rid of it is nothing to do with sexual preferences, sex work etc.

PencilsInSpace · 30/10/2019 21:39

What's your involvement in the porn industry SGB?

StreetwiseHercules · 30/10/2019 21:41

“ And how do you tell which this is?”

I guess people would do that by exercising judgement.

user1479305498 · 30/10/2019 21:42

Easy money and zero quals needed. Some young girls seem to have an utter lack of respect for themselves , get out and get qualified , if not, then don't moan when some of us judge you. Personally I would rather read a good book or cook a nice meal . Cannot think of any crappier way to make cash. I find it sad too that many guys (and some women) have so little imagination. Personally I think it should all have to be paid for makes it easier to know who has a habit well over what their partner would be OK with and harder to hide. I am not totally anti it I am anti the fact that so many guys in particular seem to think virtually every day is fine and we just have to 'live with it' , but will then go nuts if we want to leave 'because ' of it. Moderation for many has gone by the wayside, if you are single then fill your boots, if not at least have the decency to get your partners thoughts on it.

StreetwiseHercules · 30/10/2019 21:43

“ People are so quick to protect porn.”

I think it’s less that and more that people are alarmed by creeping puritanism dressed up as virtue, and those seeking to interfere in people’s private sex lives.

The denial that ethical porn exists and that it can be ok indicates an extremist mindset which is not what it is presenting itself to be.

PencilsInSpace · 30/10/2019 21:45

the crucial point: exploitation occurs in many industries

Porn enthusiasts would like to make this the crucial point but it isn't. Only with porn are you actually wanking off to the exploitation.

I think that's a huge qualitative difference.

SmileEachDay · 30/10/2019 21:52

It just means find a better solution than everyone has to miss out just in case

Rape. Apologist.

OP posts:
PencilsInSpace · 30/10/2019 21:58

Where can I find this 'ethical porn'?

Lots of porn enthusiasts use that phrase. I'm not convinced that anything more than a tiny minority actually make the effort to find it. Most just take it on trust that such a thing exists because they think it's a useful argument.

I don't understand why the 'ethical porn' lovers are not expressing outrage at the mainstream porn lovers who know what they are wanking to might be abuse but just don't care. Examples are on this thread (although the most shocking post has now been deleted).

StreetwiseHercules · 30/10/2019 22:00

“ Where can I find this 'ethical porn'?

Lots of porn enthusiasts use that phrase. I'm not convinced“

Google it. You’ve never seen it but you’re not convinced. Right.

SmileEachDay · 30/10/2019 22:02

I guess people would do that by exercising judgement

Except people don’t. On average there are 92 million visits to Pornhub every day.

OP posts:
StreetwiseHercules · 30/10/2019 22:05

“ Except people don’t. On average there are 92 million visits to Pornhub every day.”

And lots of people view content there which is perfectly fine. Content which is not fine is something that big tech needs to be lobbied on in order to improve standards.

SmileEachDay · 30/10/2019 22:09

And lots of people view content there which is perfectly fine

How many don’t? How many view content of women who have not consented, of children or of women who have been exploited?

OP posts:
StreetwiseHercules · 30/10/2019 22:10

“How many don’t? How many view content of women who have not consented, of children or of women who have been exploited?”

I have no idea, and neither do you. That kind of content should never be available anywhere.

SmileEachDay · 30/10/2019 22:11

I have no idea, and neither do you.

Which is exactly my point. 🤦🏻‍♀️

OP posts:
JAPAB · 30/10/2019 22:12

Rape. Apologist.

Yes of course. Suggesting that the solution to say trafficking is to find and stop the traffickers, rather than taking the things they traffick people into away from everyone, is apologism.

So in the case of porn that is rape apologism. In the case of things like nail bars and fruit picking and other domestic work, presumably any other position than 'stop the traffickers by banning the entire profession of nail salons and ffruite-picking and domestic cleaning fullstop is slavery apologism'

StreetwiseHercules · 30/10/2019 22:13

Your point isn’t clear at this juncture.

What is it you want to happen again?

SmileEachDay · 30/10/2019 22:33

Fortunately MN agree with me JAP.

My point is crystal clear Street. But it doesn’t suit your worldview to acknowledge it.

OP posts:
ReanimatedSGB · 30/10/2019 22:45

I've heard arguments that shrug off the exploitation and cruelty involved in agriculture and textiles on the grounds that everyone needs to eat and wear clothes. No one needs to have a manicure, yet modern slavery is very common in high street nail bars.. If a nail artist came on to this thread to state that she enjoyed her job, was paid a good wage for it and had chosen that line of work, would people start wailing that she must be deluded, lying, disingenous or a brainwashed victim?
(Please note, I am not intending in any way to suggest that people who choose to provide manicures and nail art for money are either complicit in or responsible for human trafficking purely because they work in an industry which has a serious problem with it.)
It's only when sexual activity is involved that so many people lose their shit completely and insist on maintaining this patronizing, dishonest ignorance - even to the extent of stating that people with direct experience of sex-related work can't possibly know the truth about it in the way that some muppet who has read some shit on a website does.

StreetwiseHercules · 30/10/2019 23:03

What is it you are arguing for exactly SmileEachDay?

StreetwiseHercules · 30/10/2019 23:04

“ It's only when sexual activity is involved that so many people lose their shit“

Indeed, because they associate sex with shame, and they perpetuate that particular worldview.