AIBU to be sick of these comments?

[SundayGirlB]

My baby is 5 months old and ginger. I LOVE his hair. It wasn't a surprise, both DH and I were ginger as kids and my side of the family are Irish and ginger.

It's the first thing people mention, which is fine. I think he is gorgeous. But I get so many comments like 'oh no, it's not ginger it's more blonde' or 'it will go blonde/brown' or 'are you worried he will be bullied?', 'ah, i don't mind it on babies but not adults' etc etc.

I am fine for him to be a little flamed haired beauty forever but seriously, he is only 5 months and already getting negative comments. People need to get over this ginger thing.

AIBU to dye my blonde hair ginger in solidarity and tell people to sod off?

Missteebeee

You should never comment on a stranger's appearance. Weren't you ever taught that? Positively or negatively. It's ok to say "What a beautiful coat!" or "I love your shoes"

But to comment on someone's body or appearance/skin/hair, is rude in the extreme.

I think hair colour and differences in general are far more accepted these days. Thank goodness. Please try not to let these people’s comments get to you. It says more about them than it does about you.

UANBU. I love red hair, was hoping for a red head as there is in dh's family but alas not to be. I have a cousin with auburn hair and it's just gorgeous.

Can't believe people are that rude!

"Aren't you worried about bullying because they are ginger?"

"No, luckily they won't be at school with you"

DS2 gets continual low-level bullying at school for his hair colour...all you can do is work on their resilience and self-esteem, really. It's tough out there for any kid who differs from the norm, I guess.

It's so weird that it ever became a "thing" it's just a colour

People are assholes! I love red hair in all its glorious shades! In fact I was gutted when my baby boys dark red hair all fell out only to be replaced by a golden blonde.

Red hair in men especially is very popular in Scotland - a certain Outlander character Jamie Fraser being responsible! I would call anyone who is negative about my child out and point out that red/ ginger hair is beautiful and they have no right to judge your child for the gorgeous hair that he was born with!

I get that about my son's height (although he does also have red hair, strangely enough!). He's very short, and will always be very short. I am 5ft 5, and so is my husband, but he has female family members who are below 5 foot tall. My son is below the 2nd percentile for height. He is, and will be short. Which is fine! However, people are always telling me that he will catch up, that their son was short and then had a sudden growth spurt etc. Nobody ever says that there's nothing wrong with being shorter, they always want to reassure me that he might end up being tall, as if being short would be some terrible outcome. It's annoying, and does make me worried for him in the future.

Yes this absolutely pisses me off. When my second was born with red hair. My bil (22 year old) actually said, "I hate ginger hair, if I had a kid with ginger hair I'd kill it" whilst staring down at his iPad. My husband and I were shocked that anyone could say such a thing about a baby! Especially family?! I was so mad that we didn't say anything! I put it down to his immaturity and lack of life skills. I stopped inviting him over since then and generally dont bother with him. Fast forward 6 years and his new girlfriend and her son both have red hair, so maybe his attitude has improved?!!

I adore red hair, it is so beautiful on men/ladies and children. Best thing you can loudly say when anyone else comments is, "I love red hair!"

I wanted a ginger baby!

Also...You can get really beautiful strawberry blonde hair dye that works amazing on blonde hair... then you stick your middle finger up 😊😂

@Beesandcheese sorry your children are targeted, I had hoped this sort of bullying had stopped now! I mention Irish family as I was making the point I expected red hair and was happy with it as Ireland has the highest population of redheads after Scotland I believe. Obviously you can be from other countries and have ginger hair.

@OtraCosaMariposa I alternate between ginger and red head but ginger seems to be used negatively more often so want to own it. In my family it's used affectionately. TBH I hadn't planned to make a 'thing' of his hair but feel like I may have to to ensure he is especially proud of it to combat negative comments as other posters have with their children.

So Scotland, Spain and Italy are good bets for some redhead adoration. Leaning towards Italy.

Yip. I come from a family of red heads and both my children have red hair. Responses are very different between boys and girls and also change depending on the person. My sister was mercilessly bullied and her red hair was something easy for the bullies to latch on to. She died her hair as soon as she could. My brother was the victim of a completely unprovoked, violent attack from a gang of older teenagers and they had picked him out of the crowd for his red hair.

When I had my children I too had the relentless comments about their red hair... An American tourist once sadly asked my husband if he was disappointed they didn't have his colouring (mousy brown) and he looked her in the eye and told her that that was a bloody ridiculous thing to say.

I have always loved my hair... My kids love their hair. Raise your child to know he is beautiful inside and out.

And any fucker who laughs or comments on negative Facebook's memes about gingers just be aware that you complicit in the bullying of children.

I think a deadpan "wow, that's rude".

I have the opposite problem in that I am ginger with a blonde baby. The number of people who have said to me happily "oh, he's not ginger then" as if I'm going to turn around and be like "yeah, thank fuck for that, wouldn't want him to take after me".

I love my hair and always have. I wish he was ginger!

Oh and we go to Italy a lot and have never experienced any unwanted or over the top attention. Just the right amount of affection that most Italians show to all well behaved kids.

Oh and finally.... I grew up in the west coast of Scotland. There is still an association between gingerness and irishness and Catholicism. Much anti-ginger sentiment is a throw back to the No Blacks, No Irish, No Dogs era.

@Beautiful3 bloody hell what a ridiculous arse. No.wonder you.were lost for words!

@Qu1tter I bloody hate those memes. People who comment on those are worse than thoughtless, they are morally reprehensible.

God I am nervous now! Thinking I will be jazzing up the impending mum bob with some red dye.

All of my grandchildren have got fiery red curly hair... their Dad was badly bullied at school for his and keeps his shaved as a result.

I'm so envious, I think their hair is glorious. God help anyone who makes a negative comment about them in my presence.

Okay don’t shoot me down but in a way I understand other people thinking this. If you went to school certainly in the 80s and 90s, bullying ginger people happened. By both the students and the teachers.

My best mate is ginger and got dreadfully bullied because of her hair colour. She married a ginger who also got dreadfully bullied. They went on to have 3 ginger children. The relief she feels that her kids don’t get bullied about being ginger is huge. She was expecting it to happen.

It’s rude and unnecessary to say anything about it to you, but I get why older people think that it might happen.

I used to dye my hair ginger because I think it looks gorgeous! Next time someone says, "It'll go brown/blonde" respond with, "I hope not! I absolutely love red hair." When they say, "Oh no, it's more blonde", stand proud and say, "No, it's definitely ginger. I love it" and they'll soon realise their comments are pointless.

Bring him to see me, I like ginger/red hair! Hair often darkens over time so I can see why people enquire if you think he'll stay ginger. However- I can also see how they could ask it in a really rude way. YANBU to ask those people if they meant to be so rude.

My mum was Copper topped.. she used to get comments all the time but, her hair was beautiful.
I ended up being a brunette with red tones, one sister is very blonde a little copper and the other is exactly like my mum - aside from she hides it with awful bleach!!
My sister ( who dyes hers ) her two sons are Ginger as is her Hubby. There hair is cut very short but, its beautiful!
My DD6 has blonde hair but, definite red tones again its gorgeous.
Look them in the eye and tell them their kid is butt ugly and should wear a mask!
Honestly, people cannot stop themselves can they?

When my DS 10 was a toddler, he had the most beautiful curly blonde shoulder length hair, piercing blue eyes and full red lips - we would always get " what a beautiful little girl " or " oh God, cut his hair he's a boy " the best was " do you want him to be gay? "
I mean WTF!! The amount of people who got the evils from me, I'm surprised they didn't explode into flames!!

My first boy was born with what I can only describe as strawberry blond hair it was gorgeous! Everyone we saw commented and when people said I expect it will go blond we just said we hoped not as we loved it. It used to really piss me off it was the first thing people said every time! Hope your child keeps their beautiful colour.

The thing about all the ginger threads on MN is that no-one will admit to disliking ginger hair, in fact they tend to bring out some really OTT responses about how much some people adore it.

Yet in RL, so many people dislike it as a hair colour so really these threads don't produce any answers if you see what I mean.

I agree with JasonPollack, just that deadpan put-down, every-single-time.

I don't understand the adoration for red hair, blonde hair, brown hair, whatever hair. It's just hair. To elevate a particular colour gives rise and excuse for other people to make less nice comments about it. Stamp on the bullying but stop glorifying too.

I live in Scotland. My 13 year old neice got told last week by some little boot she should kill herself, because she has strawberry blonde hair.

Personally, I adore ginger hair! I think it's just so beautiful and striking. The world is full of morons though, so I'm definitely one of the crowd who says reply with non subtle comments about how they're being a prick.