...to buy radar key online to use disabled loo?

[Marigo]

I’m not disabled and neither are any of my children, however I’m often out with my 3 under 2.5 and in our local shopping centre loos there’s no toilet in the baby change. The ladies is impossible with double buggy plus buddy board and the disabled requires a radar key. Same for the loos in the two big department stores so I just can’t go out into town unless it’s the weekend and my husband can come in case I need a wee! I’m struggling to leave the house for this stress but my mom is disabled and I know how shit it is when she can’t use the large cubicle she needs. I’m really conflicted about what to do.

It’s madness reading the lengths people will go to to try and justify their sense of entitlement. There are many suitable alternatives you can make that don’t impact anyone else or risk harm.
The tiny little things you can do that helps you use every day things.
Why would you just make adaptations when you know for damn sure there are those who cannot make these adjustments. You would be making everyone’s life so much easier.

Shame the thought process seems to be about reasons rather than thinking about easy alternatives.

Spikey there was a post up thread that mentioned changing facilities only being in the ladies. Iirc there was also mention that both adults needed to be in with the children and so would use disabled space because he wasn’t allowed in the ladies.

It’s madness reading the lengths people will go to to try and justify their sense of entitlement.

I'm trying to work out why people seem to be jealous of the people for whom the disabled toilet was created.

It's a really awful stance to take. I can't work out why so many are happy to share that think this way, they should be embarrassed.

If I could go in to the men's and supervise this would be easier. I might just self identify as Derek for 5 minutes.

I genuinely can't wait for more gender neutral toilets, life is so much easier when there is one of those.

Usually if both parents are there then one would wait outside with the other children so if they do both need to be there then it is most likely that one of the children is disabled.

Rows of gender neutral is the way toilets will evolve. And one massive disabled/family room tacked on at the end.

It will be very surprising if anywhere other than massive shopping centres opt for seperate family and disabled loos due to the space they take up.

Coach you don’t have to identify as anyone.
Even if you needed the loo and there was a queue at the ladies. No one to stop you using the gents.
It’s nothing new. I remember females relatives doing it back in the early 80’s.

Or one of the parents is disabled.

Not one massive disabled/family room.
Disabled rooms should always be separated from other groups.

Disabled facilities should always be kept distinct as just that and none combined with any other group.

There is a new changing places toilet at an outdoor place near me. I have heard that people are being kept waiting by people who aren't disabled using it a place to get changed in.

I only have one child but I’ve found using the end toilet and leaving the door slightly ajar and going quickly works. Or if I was at all worried taking her with me on my lap.

The only way I’d use a disabled is if that’s the only place the change facilities were for nappies but thankfully many places seem to be adding more of these outside. I hate changing nappies in a disabled loo as I am horribly aware someone might be waiting.

It can be a few minutes inconvenience for me but there are rarely more than one disabled toilets for all of those who need them so I think as an able bodied person we need to do everything we can to be considerate. Ideally there would be more facilities and families ones but I don’t think the solution is asking disabled people to essentially budge up for parents.

wow this thread is crazy. so we now have the "omg my child will be stolen" and "omg my child is too naughty" as excuses to use a disabled toilet.\why the fuck do mn hq not stamp this stuff out.

Can I get a pair of these glasses that allows someone to detect disabilities based on looks? I assume they also give a diagnosis? Shocking really they aren't advertised more freely, no more tests to find out what's wrong. Waiting lists would disappear overnight.

Still waiting for MN HQ to explain why it is acceptable for posters to denigrate parents.

Toilet issue aside, it cannot be permissible for posters to call someone a ‘bitch with a brood’, tell a woman she should not leave the house, wet herself, go in the men’s room, leave their baby unattended (because there are not enough statistics to show children can be abducted), and otherwise not live a normal life.

I never use the disabled toilet because I haven’t needed to. However it’s clear to me from this thread that people can be selfish and entitled regardless of being disabled or not.

😂😂 well I definitely added fuel to that fire. Oooops.

Fear not from now on I'm going to bolster in to the blokes bogs cough and announce myself as Derek then slam out a giant 19" dildo in to the urinal to show my dominance, slap on a fake moustache then tell little one to have a wee quick. Never once loosing eye contact with the other men in there and walk out like McGregor.

I've sorted it don't panic.

A mother with three children just nipped in the disabled loo in the shopping centre I’m currently in telling the kids to ‘ come in here, they’re cleaner’ I’m in the baby change one now. No choice.

@TotinEggs you do know being a mother isn’t a protected characteristic don’t you? Posters are responding to the frankly ludicrous idea that able-bodied people are entitled to use a disabled toilet because they have a pram. Yes some replies are brunt and robust, but come on! It’s ridiculous.

As someone who has inflamitory bowel disease like a few others when I need to go I can't hold. It is bad enough in itsself to have such without finding a mum with her kids and big pram use it.
Delays for those with bowel conditions can mean they have accidents .
I now have to use a walking aid which means I need the disabled loo as it is almost impossible to use a normal one .
I recently bought a radar key and as yet have not needed it. I wish that you had to have medical evidence to get one..
I have never used the toilets in baby change despite them being easier for my walker, because I don't have a baby to change.
You obviously feel that having children entitles you to use disabled facilities.
You chose to have children ( ok not twins) but nevertheless you chose to have children close in age , and chose your pram/buggy . No one chooses their disabilities. I only hope that you never have the genuine need to use such facilities, to be delayed because a parent uses them.
Get your key as so many abuse the facilities as it is .

TotinEggs i assume that post was deleted as I have not seen it.
you do realise disabled people can be mothers too.
please can you tell me/us why disabled people are being selfish /entitled to want disabled facilities to be used by disabled people.
really don't understand that.

I don’t think parents should be using disabled toilets, actually.
I also do not think having a protected characteristic gives you a free pass to be a jerk.

People are entitled and selfish when they want to use a space designed specifically for their needs?
Am I missing the tongue in cheek part?

still don't get it.

I have never used the toilets in baby change despite them being easier for my walker, because I don't have a baby to change.

The whole point of this thread is toilet in baby charge areas are few and far between.
Where are you finding these facilities?

Toilet with a changing unit.
Starbucks and McDonald’s iirc. To name a few.
However the changing unit is what a lot of places class as adequate provisions for disabled people. 🤣
Yes I have had this said when we asked about facilities. Anyone who is either a parent or carer would have had similar conversations.

Someone was amazed that disabled people aren’t adequate and why further campaigning is ongoing. The above example is what is deemed as acceptable. Great for some. Utterly useless for those that require changing a pad or being lifted from chair to toilet.
It’s not always about the toilets are small to begin with, but not many places want to put in the cost of installing a overhead hoist. I’ve been in some big rooms. However if you cannot get yourself in the toilet they are useless to most users. Another reason why they might not seem to be used that much.