MIL pawning off old dusty baby clothes on me

[GetTheSprinkles]

Maybe I'm an ungrateful cow but...
I'm 36w pregnant with first DC and I have bought some lovely new clothes for him (as has my DM). The other day MIL ambushes me downstairs with a small pile of clothes she has apparently been saving for the last THIRTY years. She hands me some of DP's old baby clothes, very proud of herself. There are three baby grows that look like they'd fit a tiny doll and are now a dirty yellow (presumably were once white), a really scratchy bright orange and black wool jumper for ages 2+, a tatty/dried out brown dressing gown for ages 1-2 and an old-fashioned, neon snow suit. All smell clean but dusty. She chuckles that I may want to wash them. I'm thinking I may want to burn them. Is it rude to flat out refuse them? I was about to tell her I didn't want them when DP who was nearby piped up saying how cute they were and of course we'd use them
I'm planning to take them and leave them in a wardrobe forever... although I hate clutter so really just want to throw them away. AIBU?

YABU

Wash them and dont use them but dont throw them away. Either keep them to show your child in years to come what their father wore or take a pic with your child wearing them then re-dress.

I personally wouldn't like this either to be honest. I've kept some of my favourite baby clothes from my child but I would never hope, expect or pressure my child to dress their babies in them! There's a difference between keeping and passing on certain items (e.g. a christening gown or the fab-sounding green jumper got great!) and just passing on yellow and crusty babygrows that you remembered to bag up to keep in the attic.
Saying that, I wouldn't upset MIL by making a fuss. As others have said, just accept graciously as you would any other gift, keep them in the wardrobe until your baby will have outgrown them and offer them back to MIL. I think that some PPs have been really over the top their responses calling the OP a cunt, dick and bitch for not wanting these clothes for her baby. She doesn't go round kicking puppies in her spare time, may be she's just excited about choosing her own clothes for her new baby to wear that will be precious to her. Nothing wrong with that.

@LifeImplosionImminent
I really hope that you meant baby girls things or that you have only one dd
@Wibdib
Hope you weren't serious, but it did make me smile.
Finally OP
Please don't upset dh and mil. Just wash and hand back in reasonable time.
Pick your battles as other pp have said. At some point you may need support of dh or mil try not to alienate her now.
Good luck and best wishes.

Say thank you, wash them, and see if they fit your baby. I think it's sweet that she's kept them all this time. Wouldn't kill you to put your dc in one of the outfits, send MIL a photo... it is up to dh as well.

You sound like you resent her involvement
She is your dh mother and is entitled to get excited about her presumably first GC

Don’t refuse them as she will be very hurt but do as everyone else has suggested

Wow! Some really over the top responses on here!

OP is not a bitch for not wanting to dress her tiny baby in ugly, dusty, 30 year old clothes. I’ve never heard of anyone passing on clothes that are so old and I too would hate to have to make space in my small house for stuff I don’t want.

If they’re sentimental to the MIL she should have asked if she could dress the baby in them for a photo then taken them back herself, she cannot seriously be expecting the OP to use these clothes on a day to day basis.

These are things that were special to her, mementoes of her child, maybe she has a funny memory of her little boy in his dressing gown. She has saved them for all this time because she couldn't bear to part with them.
She wanted to share this moment of her child with her now adult child, a mixing of the two generations. Seeing her child's child in an item thatwas theirs.
It really wouldn't hurt you to put baby in the outfit, take a pic and send it or even put baby in the outfit for a few hours. It would go a long way in your relationship with your DIL though.

By DIL , I mean MIL.

I’m beginning to think that the majority of MIL threads are either made up or wildly exaggerated.

This ones one of them.

Just wondering what dreadful fate awaits a baby who is dressed in old clothes- and whether it awaits all the royal babies who have worn 100 year old christening robes!

And why anybody would not cherish a picture of their baby dressed in the same clothes his daddy wore.

Wash them and put baby in them for a phot, won't do any harm and refusing would cause drama you don't need. Ask if she has photos of your husband in the outfits and you can do a cute comparison when baby is here!

Don't lots of MILS and DMs do this? I know my DM did with my DB and SIL. Don't think baby ever wore them, maybe she dressed him in them once so we could all have a good giggle. My DM would never have expected the baby to be dressed in them for a day out.
Likewise I wish my MIL had saved some stuff! Some of the old styles are quite cool again now, particularly 90's stuff and the materials were getting softer then.

Either way, it's nothing to start a MN thread about or say they're being 'pawned off on you'. Just another excuse for a MIL bashing thread from a DIL of a pfb. Yawn.

Take them, be polite, once your baby arrives take a few pictures in the outfits to send to MIL and then ask her if she wants the outgrown clothes back again. They clearly mean something to her and maybe in 30 years’ time you’ll be more understanding.

^this. I have a few items that my children wore as babies (most was passed on once they grew out of it all) and I would happily let them have for their babies if they wanted them.

This is my ds in a 35year old cardigan previously worn by his dad. And it was knitted by someone who was a very old lady at the time.Ds has managed to avoid catching “old biddy” from it. Although, thinking about it, he is very partial to a cup of tea and a biscuit....

My MIL had kept everything and gave it all to us

Clothes (full 0-5 wardrobe)
Cloth nappies
Cot and pram ( I did decline these as they’d been kept uncovered in a bat infested loft)

Washed everything put the boys in some of of the clothes took photos. And used the “Harrington squares” as floor cloths. Then quietly got rid of it all when children had outgrown.

It clearly all meant a lot to her and it didn’t kill me to be nice.

You don't have to use them but you can be gracious. The tone of your post is nasty.

LOL at catching “old biddy” gorgeous baby boy Bert.

Please just be gracious and kind. It costs nothing.

The royal christening gown and that lovely knitted blue cardi are not dried out, tatty or dirty looking. The cardi is also presumably not scratchy since the baby looks very happy in it. People are conflating old clothes that are still in good condition with old clothes that are not.

The snow suit is the only item described by OP that is a matter of taste rather than quality. It's also a tad rude to give items that need washing: even given that MIL values these things, her valuing them evidently hasn't blinded her to the state they're in.

That being said, you cannot throw them away OP. That would be appalling. Keep hold of them. Will they all be ok in the wash though? I would put them on a low temperature.

Why haven’t all these ‘awful’ MILs found something else to do with their time, hobbies, running, pets etc rather than obsess about DIL’s and their kids

Looking at the baby clothes my DP used to wear on my baby would give me an appreciation of the circle of life and the mystery of time. Plus I would feel virtuous knowing I was being planet-friendly.

Besides, when I was a completely exhausted new mum, my standards for baby clothes were - is it clean and dry? Yes? Then that'll do!

When the OP's new baby outgrows his first lot of baby clothes she will put away a special outfit or two and understand why these clothes have been kept.
I've got some set aside, I doubt I'll give them to my Dil's in case of this kind of reaction.
I have a cardie knitted for my now 31 year old Ds, it was made by my Nan who was born in 1894, a hundred years before my next child, who also wore the same cardie. I also have Christening gown and hand knitted lacy blankets made by now long dead relatives.
She must have loved her Ds in those items she passed along, be respectful of the love she has for her child and memories she has for him in these tiny outfits.

@BertrandRussell
What a doll, he's gorgeous in his cardigan.

OP, however unbelievable, those items hold dear memories for your MIL.

Having washed those well, you could make her day by trying them on in a few months and sending her a few photos.
I have no doubt she would treasure them.

I have kept some beautiful hand knitted cardigans and put them in each of my children's Memory box. To remind them how small they once were.

In a couple of years you will be pleased with yourself that you reacted kindly to her gift.

Oh and return them for sure when finished.

Good luck.

Wow that must've been a lot of storage space for a full 0-5 years wardrobe putonyourdamnsocks! We just wouldn't have had the room at the time.

Save the nicest, you don’t need to use them but destroying them will be a bad thing to do, they are the memories of your MIL, that he had chosen to share with you.