Would you prefer to live alone?

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If you had the financial flexibility to do so, and if you didn't have the emotional pressure to live with your partner, would you prefer to live alone?
Inspired by the article: www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2019/oct/13/you-dont-have-to-settle-the-joy-of-living-and-dying-alone

My answer is yes.

Yes I love being alone. I’m very happy being on my own. I do think it’s important to have friends/family ‘available’ if needed though, even just on the phone.

Right now I’d love to live alone. My dh is driving me mental.

I lived alone from my 20s, then moved in with my partner in my 30s. I loved living alone. My DP is currently away with work and I miss him SO much. I am enjoying having the bed to myself, easier housework and laundry, but I am genuinely astonished at how much I miss having someone else here. It has been particularly odd at the weekend when we have quite a set routine - long lie, breakfast in bed etc.

I think whatever you are in kind of becomes your normal? I worried I would never be able to live with someone after living alone for such a long time, but we adapted really quickly. It probably helps that we have quite a bit of space, so are able to be alone even when we’re together if we want to.

My ideal situation would be two small apartments connected by a large living space. I hate not having my own space but living alone sounds a bit miserable to me.

I'm coming at it from the 'I've always lived with other people until about three years ago, and I've never looked back' perspective.

I love it.

Yes, sometimes I do feel lonely. But in general life is just better. Eat what I want when I want. Any mess is my fault. Have full control of the remote. Can go out and spend money without anyone having an opinion.

Would not change it unless I needed to for financial reasons.

Personally no, did it for 8 years and I was fine, just had to keep super busy to avoid feeling lonely in the evenings and I prefer company tbh. Being with someone who understands comfortable silence or your own space is sometimes needed solves this for me. Also keeping busy as you get older can get a lot harder when you become less able to get out and about.

Sometimes a period of living by yourself can be cathartic, encourage you to push yourself and really helpful. Sometimes it can be lonely, depressing and make you become very single minded (in a bad way) and no longer able to compromise.

There's no right or wrong, no absolute once you decide to live alone / co-habit that must be you forever. Make the most of the positives in your circumstances (however small) - it helps. And it's never too late if you want to switch from one to the other.

Love living alone, but don’t know if I would if I didn’t have money.

I’ve been married/divorced
Lived alone with young son for 11 yrs
Then met current partner, sold my house after 2 years and bought together.
I must off forgot how hard it is to live with another adult, because I wouldn’t do it again! After running a house alone, it’s very hard to share again after making decisions by yourself
You have no arguments, waiting for bathroom, meals when you feel what time.

I’d still like a partner, but separate house

No. I hated living alone.

However, I do like having the house all to myself sometimes but if it was a permanent situation, I'd be very unhappy.

I'm sure mrformerbabe would jump at the chance though

I think that’s an important point former, I think a lot of posters see threads like this and think they enjoy having the house to themselves so jump in with ‘yes, I would love it!’ without actually thinking what it would mean.

No, loneliness is one of my biggest fears, though I'd like to think I'd have the strength to walk away if I needed to. My DH is military though so goes away a fair bit so I do get space, we're talking months at a time so I wouldn't label myself co-dependent. I'm just much happier when he's around. It's important to have a partner that brings something to your life, not just have a partner for the sake of it which I think happens to a lot of relationships, then I can imagine cohabitation has less benefits overall.

I think a lot of people don’t see living alone as an active choice - that it’s somehow something people fall into as a result of bad relationships etc and of course whilst it can be, it absolutely isn’t always.

No, because I like living with DD and DH. However I’d far rather live alone than with a person or people I was struggling to get along with. I’m perfectly happy living alone and certainly wouldn’t want company for company’s sake (although I’d want a dog).

There is very little conflict in my house, (despite living with a teen and a pre-teen!) OH and I have a good relationship, and our day-to-day interactions are characterised by laughter.

But I find humans irritating in general (myself included). I am highly intolerant to noise and sharing my personal space, hence I would be very happy living alone.

"Beyond that though, it’s just lonely. Lonely evenings, nights, weekends, knowing there’s a million people you don’t matter to."

I live alone and yes, I'm lonely quite often.
However, I think my ideal would be something in between what I have now and living with someone else e.g. a boyfriend who lives close by, company when you want it (more or less) and solitude when you want it.

"However I’d far rather live alone than with a person or people I was struggling to get along with"

Housemates are awful, no matter how nice they are as people.

Not for me as I like company and having people around. Also I love dh and would miss him too much if he wasn’t here.

No. I lived alone for a couple of years in my twenties and it didn't suit me at all. I much preferred a shared house. When I lived alone I felt scared and I also didn't look after myself properly. I'm going to read the article. It is something I think about from time to time.

I do and I love it. Sheer bliss.

water, but would you be happy without your DH and DD?

I’m guessing the answer is no - obviously, you probably like it when they go out and you get some peace from them but if you didn’t have them in your life at all, can you imagine that?

No. I’m an introvert and get burned out being around people too much, but in my house we joke that DH doesn’t count as a “person” to me- he never drains my energy like other people (even loved ones) do and I love having him around, even if we do different things in the same room.

I've had two husbands and various boyfriends over the years and by far prefer living on my own with my cat.
I'm independent with my own house, job and pension so I don't need a man.
Quite honestly they are a pain in the arse.

I think a lot of people who answer yes are probably coming at this from a place of never getting a moments peace.

Well no, I’m certainly not. You say you are lonely so obviously find it difficult to understand that many others relish it.

I was widowed in January so I didn't have any choice. I hate it.