Are they friends or jealous of me

[Maudacious]

AIBU to be upset that a couple of my so called friends don't respond when I ask for feedback on my work (designs that take about 1 minute of their time to look at). I give them lots of listening time and prop them up when they're down without fail but i'm now beginning to think they might be jealous of me. I'm less inclined to respond to their feedback requests as a result but am struggling with why some women can't be happy for their friends successes and why they like to try and put dampners on.

Wow, you’re modest too OP!

Maybe they are busy

Lol

Asking people for feedback on work is a very specific and tricky thing, it’s nothing like asking people to listen to you.

Perhaps they just don’t want to be put on the spot, or dislike your work!

You’re unlikely to get an honest opinion on your work from friends.

Why would you assume they’re jealous rather than bored?

AnneLovesGilbert - why don't they tell me it's boring then? All feedback is useful.

why some women can't be happy for their friends successes and why they like to try and put dampners on

Well, we’re talking about your friends in particular, OP. Not the wider population of womankind.

Do you have male friends? Do you get the same response?

They may not be jealous so much as thoughtless takers. That seems a more obvious conclusion to draw (imo) so it’s interesting that ‘jealous’ is where your mind went.

Zebraaa - sorry you didn't understand my post - was a genuine concern i have

what when we're in the park after school for 2 hours? Nah its not that

Not your work, but being asked for their feedback. How often are you asking them? Everyone’s busy.

Maybe they want to give negative feedback and don’t think you’ll take it very well?

Jealous isn't the first thing that comes to my mind.

The obvious answer imo, is that they don't particularly like the work you're requesting feedback for.

Do they ask you feedback about their work?

I don't think I've ever asked a friend for their opinion on something to do with my work.

Maybe they are jealous, or maybe they don't want to say they don't like it or maybe it's just weird being pushed by a friend to comment on work and they want to stick to pushing their kids on the swings.

Thanks Butchyrestingface - i think you might be right. is only a couple of friends, others are happy to respond critically as well as positively. It just feels weird when you have what seems like a good dialogue and then it goes cold. It just feels a bit rude

They ignoring u because they dont want.to give you feedback - take the hint. Foesnt make them any less friends

AnneLovesGilbert - i've asked twice in total (in the last year!) - its only two mums who non-respond and i'm happy to get negative feedback too although i get that people may not be comfortable with that

Bluemoonrising- they don't work

Waveysnail that's fine but then i don't want to listen to their dreary woes anymore if its one way traffic

and i'm happy to get negative feedback too

yeah right

I think people who politely keep quiet are the sensible ones.

I wonder what might possibly give them the idea that you may not like to receive negative feedback?

you want honest feedback? Use an anonymous forum, but brace yourself. It will be honest.

I subscribe to the old adage that if you can’t say something nice don’t say anything at all, perhaps your friends are the same.

Alright, let’s have a look. I’ll be honest and I have a few minutes spare.