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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU over non-paying colleague? Lunch dramas

1000 replies

Amelia2000 · 11/10/2019 12:06

I work in an open plan office. Every Friday we order lunch from a local food place. I happen to have a discount credit card for said food outlet, where I receive 30% off. I pay on this credit card and then on the first day of the next month it is paid off via direct debit from my current account. My six other colleagues always pay me in cash on the day (it's usually around/just over £5 each). Sometimes they will bank transfer it to me from their phone if they have forgotten cash. It is a bit of a pain having £30/£40 in cash every week that I then have to put aside rather than spend so that I can put it into the bank to pay off the card every month, but I do it so that we have a nice lunch and that everyone gets to take advantage of the discount. I've ended up getting a little petty cash tin that I keep everyone's money in so that I don't end up frittering it and then having to fork out at the end of the month myself.

There is one person out of the six, let's call her B, that over the last 6 months, always "forgets" her money. It started with me saying "don't worry just bring it in tomorrow" or "I don't have to pay the credit card off until the end of the month so it's OK, just transfer it before then". After saying this, she started not paying me at all until the end of the month, and made a little comment about me taking the money from everyone before I even needed to pay it off. This is true, however everyone else has continued to give me their cash. Like I say above, it's kept in my locked drawer in my desk so it's not like I am spending it! I would be happier if everyone paid me directly into my bank at the end of the month if they wanted to, as it would be easier for me than going into town to go into the bank.

So for the last few months I have had to keep a tally of what B has ordered every week and then let her know that's what she owes when it comes towards the end of the month. This worked for a few months, but the money was always late. She would pay on the 4th or the 5th and I would have to ask every day "ah B, have you got that money for me" and end up subbing her.

So it's now the 11th, it's Friday, she hasn't paid me for last month and so I am £24 out of pocket (The direct debit for the card gets taken out of my current account on the 1st). She obviously hasn't paid me for last week (Friday 4th) either. I have asked every single morning, and reminded her every evening. She just says "I've forgotten sorry, will bring it in tomorrow" and then it never happens. I've asked if she would rather transfer it and she has said no. I've started asking in front of other people (it's an open plan office) in the hope that she would be embarrassed into remembering but it doesn't seem to bother her. It's now got to the point where I am fuming!

We just all started talking about lunch this morning and I have said I no longer want to provide the discount card lunch for everyone as I am not getting the money back in full and on time. One of the other girls has said "who's not paying you?", I looked awkward and said "B, I know you keep forgetting but I am £24 out of pocket, and I can't afford to keep doing it". She basically accused me of bullying her and has run off to the toilets. Two of the other girls followed and said she's in there crying. There is now a horrible atmosphere in the office. She's now back at her desk and ignoring me. The others have said about not having any lunch and how they're going to starve all day. So I've given in and let them use the card. I didn't think B would have the brass neck to order something but she has.

ARGGGGGHHH! Now what?

OP posts:
Pinkyyy · 14/10/2019 10:38

She is so childish. I can't believe she's taking off work instead of just paying up. Time to send an email to everyone letting them know there's no lunch this Friday because there's still money owed to you. No need to mention names, they'll know it's B.

BuzzShitbagBobbly · 14/10/2019 10:40

OMG. Imagine using up annual leave just to avoid paying for your own lunch.

What happens when that runs out?

ohfourfoxache · 14/10/2019 10:42

I don’t understand why she doesn’t just pay up, has she no shame?

SchadenfreudePersonified · 14/10/2019 10:44

It’s actually veering away from CF territory and into theft

That ship has long since sailed MrsT

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 14/10/2019 10:44

I hope you’re not public sector because the thought of my taxes paying for all this fannying about is making me gip

Too right. I don't pay my taxes for people with feelings and real financial concerns to squander by not working every second of every day whilst being forced to sit on hot coals and listen to Jedward albums all day as their punishment for daring to exist. I want robots - soulless machines that I can flog 24/7 until they eventually fall to pieces and I can toss them into the furnace and replace them with something even more efficient.

Amelia2000 · 14/10/2019 10:46

I hope you’re not public sector because the thought of my taxes paying for all this fannying about is making me gip

Gosh who pissed on your strawberries this morning? Perhaps just don't keep reading the thread and instead choose to read posts more worthy of your time? Just a suggestion. If we weren't talking about this in the office, it would be something else. It's hardly having an impact on work rolleyes.

Apparently she's back in tomorrow according to HR.

OP posts:
clairethewitch70 · 14/10/2019 10:46

Bet she has gone to The GP for a sick note for 'workplace bullying ' and stress

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 14/10/2019 10:46

I don’t understand why she doesn’t just pay up, has she no shame?

Erm, I believe that the honourable members of the jury have already concluded that, M'Lud....

everytimerickysayscuntIlaugh · 14/10/2019 10:46

I hope you’re not public sector because the thought of my taxes paying for all this fannying about is making me gip

I love when people come out with this shit 😂 yes love you're single handedly propping up the public sector. Well done on being self employed and being so much more productive and superior to the rest of the country.

Amelia2000 · 14/10/2019 10:47

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll

Grin Grin Grin

OP posts:
lynzpynz · 14/10/2019 10:49

OP - has she ever given any indication as to why she is not paying?

I mean did you come in one day and announce you were setting yourself up as a bank / credit facility so you only need paid at the end of the month?

Did you provide her with special lunch club t&cs because she owns horses that means she can trough food and pay in trotting?

Desperate to hear her justification for this batshittery... I'm quite invested in this now 😂

CallmeAngelina · 14/10/2019 10:49

MadameButterface, That shows a singular lack of insight and empathy.
This is not of the OP's doing. There should be no quibble or hassle about a small group of people putting in a lunch order. Couple of minutes, pay up, job done. Nice thing to do, actually. In our place, it's Cake Friday. It's only when one person upsets the applecart that it becomes an issue like this, but that's hardly the OP's fault. Nor was it that other OP's fault on the Cake at Work thread, when a colleague kicked up a major stink because she wanted a vegan option. Upshot was, no one brings in cake anymore.
There's always one person who has to spoil it for everyone else.
And your taxes have got fuck all to do with it.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 14/10/2019 10:50

She's at death's door now. That's why she turned down all hot drinks on Friday - she was in the first throes of her untimely demise and just knew she'd never be able to keep any fluids down

I hope she's scrawled a hasty codicil to her Will, giving OP £35 to pay off her debt!

Grin
JoxerGoesToStuttgart · 14/10/2019 10:52

I hope you’re not public sector because the thought of my taxes paying for all this fannying about is making me gip

No, I looked it up, your taxes only pay for kitkats for MP’s spouse’s cars.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 14/10/2019 10:52

Bet she has gone to The GP for a sick note for 'workplace bullying ' and stress

That would now be the decent thing for her to do on behalf of her colleagues, but I think NHS confidentiality rules mean that the sufferers would have to go and see the GP themselves.

NettleTea · 14/10/2019 10:54

I agree about the 'stress' being something that she is claiming. After all the crying in the loo drama. Trying to turn it onto you, and now that hasnt worked she is hoping you havent spoken to the upline and can claim some kind of bullying to them.
Luckily they know the full story.

NettleTea · 14/10/2019 10:55

And as for 'paying at the end of the month like usual' - she didnt though, did she. she owes for last month and is now running a tally on this month.

PepsiLola · 14/10/2019 10:55

One thing out of all of this OP, be grateful that this has kicked off at £35... wonder how long she would have let you pay for her food!?

saraclara · 14/10/2019 10:57

I've missed about 500 posts, but is there a reason you're not prepared to order lunches for everyone else but not for her?

Even my first OP explains this, no need to RTFT.

Actually it doesn't. But no matter. Obviously there is a good reason somewhere early on that I've forgotten.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 14/10/2019 11:00

If she leaves OP (stress or whatever) and there is a collection for her, may I suggest that you take your thirty-five quid and put a note into the collection envelope to that effect, ending with "Please don't feel you have to worry about giving me back what you owe as I have it now.".

Maybe add "Ta."?

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 14/10/2019 11:02

Hmm, I don't want this to be outing, OP, but.... does B have a squeaky little voice and squeal every time she doesn't get her own way?

AIBU over non-paying colleague? Lunch dramas
myolivetree · 14/10/2019 11:03

@saraclara not being funny but in the OP it explains how everyone except the CF pays up for their lunches bought on OP's card. She doesn't settle her debt so...It's there in great detail actually Hmm

MadameButterface · 14/10/2019 11:09

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Amelia2000 · 14/10/2019 11:12

@saraclara

I've missed about 500 posts, but is there a reason you're not prepared to order lunches for everyone else but not for her?

Even my first OP explains this, no need to RTFT.

Actually it doesn't. But no matter. Obviously there is a good reason somewhere early on that I've forgotten.

Sorry Sara, your first post doesn't even make sense. I took it to mean, is there a reason I AM prepared to order lunches for everyone else and not for her. Which is explained in the first post, as above, everyone else pays me on time and she does not.

If your post actually meant something different, please could you advise and I will try and answer it for you?

OP posts:
MrMeSeeks · 14/10/2019 11:12

im guessing gp too Hmm then you won’t possibly be able to pull her up on owing money.

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