Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think I should pay 1/3?

744 replies

stickeritup · 01/10/2019 19:37

Travelling with my cousin and his wife to another cousin’s wedding in a different part of the country. They have one child, who’s also coming. I don’t have any.

We’re hiring a car because neither of us has a big enough one. The cost is £120. I assumed we’d pay £40 each for the three adults. Cousin has text saying ‘so that’s £60 each’, meaning £60 for me and £60 between him and his wife.

I don’t think this is right. AIBU? I know it’s only £20 but it happens all the time when some couples assume that they count as ‘one’.

OP posts:
MRex · 03/10/2019 16:35

Hire car charges differ for different car types. More people and stuff = more weight = more petrol. These are simple facts.

For OP, the train would still be cheaper if she books it in advance, so would flights.

GooseFeather · 03/10/2019 16:45

I agree with runoutofnamechanges here. It seems unequal that OP benefits more from the savings of a car share than the couple does. It makes OP look like the CF.

I also think it is problematic and unneeded to put an extra car onto the road from an environmental perspective. As well as the tiredness factor of the long journey. With three potential drivers, the two parents can take it in turns to sit in the back and entertain their child, while OP is always up front as passenger or driver, no need to get involved with child at all.

INeedAFlerken · 03/10/2019 16:47

So they clearly need a bigger car even without you in it? If they need to put a case in your car then they weren't just hiring one to accommodate you. If I were you I'd put a large suitcase in my boot when he comes at the weekend and say that there isn't room for his and yours, then he'll have to pay 100% of the hire for one they can fit in!

Agree. Your cousin was just looking for you to subsidise his own family's costs if they can't fit in their own car with their stuff without you.

Enjoy your solo trip. Stop and see nice things, people you know! Enjoy the peace without the baby you'd have been stuck entertaining in the back seat when you weren't driving.

Gogreen · 03/10/2019 16:48

50/50 is fair, I’m confused by those who are saying 3rds!

I know the couple are married and are two separate people, but they travel as one in one car, the op travels as one in one car....they combine together so 50/50 half each.

If the Op was going to travel in one car, the husband one car and the wife also going to be travelling in her own car, then it’s 1/3 each, as 3 cars have gone down to share one, but the couple own and travel in the same car, hence why it’s 50/50. As just two cars.

runoutofnamechanges · 03/10/2019 17:09

@stickeritup Just to make clear, I don't think you are an actual CF, just that you hadn't done the numbers and realised that if you split it 3 ways, you are the only one saving money.

walkintheparc · 03/10/2019 17:13

I would make it clear the reason you aren't going is because it's being split in half. If his wife can't afford to go, she doesn't need to you. You shouldn't effectively be paying for half of her journey!

You've all been invited to the wedding. If 3 friends were going somewhere, it would be split 3 ways.

neonlight · 03/10/2019 17:14

definitely pay a third each. There are 3 people. why should a couple count as one person? Ridiculous!

frazzledasarock · 03/10/2019 17:14

@Gogreen the cousin needs a bigger car for his baby and luggage. OP can use her own car but agreed to car share the hire car. However she doesn’t need a large hire car her and her luggage take up less space.

Cousin needs more space and a bigger car for him his wife and baby and all their stuff.

calmalamadown · 03/10/2019 17:19

What cars do you both own? How does your cousin usually cope with his car, if it can't take two adults, a child and luggage? I can't think of any bootless three seaters!

GiantKitten · 03/10/2019 17:19

I'm bemused at the RAC saying fuel is £127 each way. Bristol to Inverness is 527 miles; presumably there are extra miles either end as we don't have precise destinations but still, my old Zafira gets nearly 500 miles on one tankful which costs under £60 Confused

I'm wondering if he's 'accidentally' quoting the return mileage fuel cost?

But anyway, I hope you have a delightful peaceful journey by yourself, OP Smile

AnotherEmma · 03/10/2019 17:20

I think the point is that if OP shares with them she'll have a much longer, more stressful journey (because of the toddler) than if she travelled alone, so it's not really worth it even if she would save £67. It might be worth it if they split the costs 3 ways as she'd save £130. The couple would only save £5 but they would also get an extra person to share the driving and help entertain the toddler. Plus they'd get a bigger, more comfortable car to travel in.

AnotherEmma · 03/10/2019 17:20

Yikes, I missed a page! I was replying to runoutofnamechanges

managedmis · 03/10/2019 17:23

Omfg

If someone came at me with all that maths bullshit I'd just say no

RAC Hmm

TheKarateKitty · 03/10/2019 17:24

@anotheremma Exactly my point in breaking in down. 🙂

reginafelangee · 03/10/2019 17:25

Either take your own car or stop being tight and pay 50/50

monkeymonkey2010 · 03/10/2019 17:26

Hang on.....if there was room for OP and her stuff in their car before, why is there now not enough room for his own suitcase even though OP and her stuff will no longer be travelling with them?

runoutofnamechanges · 03/10/2019 17:29

@AnotherEmma I totally agree that it's not worth any saving to do that journey with a toddler! I was just making the point that splitting it by 3 is pretty unfair when you look at the actual numbers.

OrchidInTheSun · 03/10/2019 17:29

Monkey - because they want to hire a car and get the OP to pay half, selling it her as a benefit

OrchidInTheSun · 03/10/2019 17:32

@runoutofnamechanges in your analysis you have missed out the fact that CFs need to hire a car whether or not the OP is travelling with them. So your sums are flawed. They are getting the OP to sub their car hire.

Vulpine · 03/10/2019 17:33

But if it was just the couple they would pay half each, so one extra brings it down to a third each

TheKarateKitty · 03/10/2019 17:37

But how is it fair that OP should pay half when they are two? That’s the issue. They are a couple, two separate people, they each pay their share. That’s looking at just the numbers. Numbers includes costs as well as number of adults. You can also look up costs of a traveling babysitter and add that in for value.
The cousin his wife are CFs for trying to get OP to pay £62 more plus babysit.

Gogreen · 03/10/2019 17:39

It makes no difference if the cousin needs to hire a bigger car, the op is paying half of the hire and petrol of a car with her cousin, that would cost her a hell of a lot more than paying the full amount of petrol of a two seater sports car on her own, so they are both combining to save money.

Go in hire car for £120 or drive herself the whole way with no other driver to help and pay petrol for a 2 seater car that’s a sports car (unless it’s a smart car) that would be way way more than just £120

AnotherEmma · 03/10/2019 17:39

Yes I see your point.
It's all moot now as OP is driving by herself.
But I still think the best solution would be for the couple to buy a roof box, which they could use for future trips. It would be essential if they have another child and can't (or don't want to) buy a bigger car.
If they don't want to buy a roof box, they could look into hiring one - I'm guessing it would be cheaper than hiring a car.
And I suppose as a compromise they could split hire and petrol costs 40/60 (OP pays 40%, couple pays 60% or 30% each) but STILL not worth it when OP will have to travel with a toddler Grin

Personally I'd fly or get the train and ask them to collect me from the airport/station 😜

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 03/10/2019 17:43

They would have to pay me to sit in the back of a car with a toddler for nine hours. And make no mistake, that's what they're expecting you to do.

Well played, OP.

I can't see why they would want the hassle of meeting up to retrieve their luggage from you when they could have it with them. And it means you're free to arrive and leave in your own good time. Why not suggest they use the extra space to take their own suitcase?

TheKarateKitty · 03/10/2019 17:48

that would be way way more than just £120

£120 is the cost of the hire car. They want her to pay £187. Half of the estimated petrol and half of the hire car.

Yes, she would be driving herself, so there is that. Yet then control of how many stops in addition to no noise of a small child. If petrol for her really would be £254, that £67 she is paying instead of saving isn’t really worth it. She’s obviously seen that since she’s driving herself and nice enough to offer to take some of his stuff so he won’t need to pay for a hired car after all.

Swipe left for the next trending thread