Teen advice makes me worried

[ChipOnMyOvary]

I was reading this advice page for teenagers. AIBU to think it is a bit ott?
I find it a bit like girls are expected to put up with male mores. Am I a modern day Mary Whitehouse, or is this like actual grooming of pre-16 girls?

What does “sex positive” even mean ? It smacks of “sex work positive “ to me.

The website isn't the work of one man..

Quite, which makes it rather worse. Increasing the number of eyes who have read the more disturbing stuff, is only increasing the number of people who have found it acceptable.

I don't think anyone disagrees that a proportion of the content is, of course, useful.

It's the parts that directly relate to illegal practices, dangerous practices and porn promotion, which needs deleting and the author(s) held accountable.

Given the same man has written about the self stimulation of six-year-olds, on that basis alone, he should be challenged.

Warwickshire county council have, after being subject to outrage, offered the information that their programmes are based on research and evidence. And are being asked to cite that research and evidence.

This is a good thing. Sunlight can only ever be beneficial.

If all the research and evidence points to porn promotion as being beneficial, and the women in it having higher self-esteem than the national average, then let's see it. It might inform careers guidance everywhere.

Sorry, forgot link.

mobile.twitter.com/Warwickshire_CC/status/1176840357075664896?s=19

ShawshanksRedemption
Agreed that sites like this are not solely the work of one man. Regulatory / policy capture has taken hold of countless institutions since 'self identification' became a thing. This has allowed far too many to self identify themselves as experts in a host of areas. That's why the porn industry has managed to make such progress and why so many undesirable adults with a multitude of sexual fetishes have been able to access children, schools, charities and other organisations. Tools like 'kink shaming' and accusations of pearl clutching etc attempt to silence adults wanting to protect children from age inappropriate sexual issues. It's a perfect storm and this is a classic example of how completely unacceptable sexual practices (for children) have been allowed to infiltrate schools and children's lives while our backs were turned.

Excellent comments on that twitter thread. I see some Freedom of Information requests in the pipeline. That will flush out who oversaw this paedophilic content and failed to pay any regard to the law and safeguarding.

Here's some research that Warwickshire CC evidently "overlooked" or ignored when they were doing their extensive child centred, safeguarding focussed research

twitter.com/cwknews/status/1177898905050255360?s=19

Thanks for that link Datun

So much anger and feeling against Warwickshire cc. Thank god there are so many people that can see very clearly.

Did you see the comment about PIE who cleared off to the Netherlands when people realised what they were about?

Also, this

CherrieDamson
@CherrieDamson
·
3h
Replying to
@Warwickshire_CC
and
@educationgovuk

(1)A person aged 18 or over (A) commits an offence if—
(a)he intentionally causes or incites another person (B) to engage in an activity,
(b)the activity is sexual, and
(c)either—
(i)B is under 16 and A does not reasonably believe that B is 16 or over, or
(ii)B is under 13

Ummm, guilty as charged m'lady

Loving all the calls for naming/shaming/outting the porn oversharers.

FOI requests being made.

Good good bloody good.

Not interested in those that can't see this. Its as clear as day.

..and, if this porn soaked putrid mess qualifies with education.gov guidelines, then the guidelines conflict with the law, and need changing immediately to prevent inciting child abuse.

I had a quick look at the new DfE guidelines published this year and I don't see how they can claim that. I think what they mean is that they don't spell out how to be age appropriate in terms of what's not acceptable so they don't breach them. I would disagree.

I think they have changed some of the respect yourself website and removed some parts .... or maybe it is hard to navigate

Oh no - they haven’t removed what I thought was quite a minimising view of sex exploitation...

‘However the sex industry is one of the few in which women make much more money than men. Some of the biggest porn producers are now women, and studies show that in fact female porn stars have higher self-esteem and job satisfaction than the average population.

The fact is like with any line of work some people feel exploited and mistreated – this is the same as if you work in catering industry or work in an office. Why should sex work be any different? There is this idea that people who work in the sex industry do it because they are forced or have no other choice and there are people that this is true for, but the vast majority do it by choice.

The majority of female porn star are in control of what they are willing to do and who they chose to share a scene with.’

Sure non-sex slavery can be as bad as sex slavery but it doesn’t mean that it is as prevalent or that the consequences are the same. Unless an office was hidden, you are less likely to find the same sort of slavery as sex slavery in UK (May occur in other countries). Also, you are not as at risk of STIs with office or catering work as sex work... surely the message should be that slavery is a problem for the sex industry as well as other industries and if people choose to engage with it - to consider the implications...

My first boyfriend was obsessed with violent porn and used to quote magazines like Cosmo at me as part of his strategy to convince me to do things I didn't want. "Sex positivity" aimed at teens had a lot to answer for.

Oh, and when we first got together, he told me he'd thrown his porn magazines away. He thought he wouldn't need them anymore, as now he'd be doing all that stuff for real... We were both virgins.

(And when I say violent porn I mean regular mainstream porn which is full of stuff that's actually really painful if you attempt it in real life. Especially if your partner is an inexperienced, inconsiderate, selfish idiot who cannot control his urges...)

I doubt I'm the only one who's come across a porn-damaged guy like this one.

Well apparently:

“
Is porn addictive?

To date there has not been a signal piece of recognised research to show conclusively that porn is in any way addictive or causes any sort of psychological harm to people who watch it.
“

Some interesting digging being done on the FWR thread.

who are these people that think you should comply with sex acts when you're scared not to mention underage?

Perhaps some readers will use that info to weigh up whether whatever they want to see a doctor for is urgent enough that it needs addressing with any HCP or whether it can wait for a specific gender.

I love the "urgent enough" line. I have sexual abuse in my past. In the last few weeks I was in A&E bleeding profusely from my rear. A male dr wished to examine me, it's on my notes regarding female medics advised. Said male dr was told he needed to administer general anaesthetic, or get a female dr. He was genuinely surprised I was fully prepared to sit there bleeding, with blood transfusions increasingly likely, than let him shove his finger up my arse.

with any HCP or whether it can wait for a specific gender.

I think gender sterotypes are, and always have been harmful, mainly to women, actual desths, etc, but also to men.

Its the sex of the HCP that matters to me

Gender stereotypes need to disappear.

You are male or female, live your life however you want so long as you are not hurting others. Seems simple enough.

The thinking that produces this stuff IMO comes out of many years of a particular way of thinking, that's sort of creeped in.

The idea that kids will do sexual things anyway, so it's more protective to talk about them.

The idea that young people can and should decide when they are ready for sex, and it's just fine and normal for anyone 16(ish) or above to do so, have any number of partners, etc, as long as they are safe. This is a little different than saying, lots of kids will do it even though we adults know its usually best to wait longer, and so the emphasis on giving advice changes.

Flipping Masters and Johnson. It's become a truism that whatever sex acts are popular fads now, they always have been even if people used to be secretive and ashamed. As a result, people didn't think - gee, maybe it would be better if anal sex wasn't considered just like regular sex and normalised". People also fail to realise that you can't treat it totally individualistically - people's expectations are set by what they see and hear in the wider culture.

Inappropriate understanding of child development generally. The same people who think that it's a good idea to talk about genocide with six year olds may think that talking about adult sex topics is a good idea too. Because they don't understand children't mental development.