To have a list of deal breakers? JUST FOR FUN!

[Pennypringles]

I'm very recently single so not anywhere near ready to mingle. I'm 48 and know what I want though. Thinking far into future dating any potential partner would have to meet certain criteria (my kids obviously) and certain things would be deal breakers. I couldn't date a racist for example. Probably not a smoker. I'd need to know their politics and views on Brexit 🤣
Just for fun what would your deal breakers be?
What questions would you ask?
It's all sounding a bit Rosie Project!

Poor spelling and grammar
Not well travelled or no desire to
Shorter than about 5'8
Poor diet
Overweight and unfit
Sun/ Daily Mail reader
Brexit voter
Wet blanket
Smoker
Heavy drinker
Football lout
Large beards
Emotionally cold
Overconfident (gym selfies, mirror poses etc)
Cheats/ chases other women (think this one is really common!)
Self-employed but describes themselves as a 'CEO'

Those final 3 describe 90% of men on Tinder when I was on it

Oh yeah also

bald or receding hairline
Bad teeth

Here's my list of deal breakers...

Right wing views.
Closed mindedness.
Poor sense of humour.
Football/sports addiction.
Gym addiction.
Don't have to have tattoos or piercings but must not be against them (I'm covered in both!)

I don't care what job they have or how much they earn (I have my own career and can support myself).
Never been bothered about height.
I do appreciate a bit of extra chunkiness, just personal taste. Not a deal breaker if they don't have it.

I'm not a fan of "blokey" men tbh.

I'm not single but when I was dating, the most important thing I looked for was a good sense of humour. I wanted a guy that could make me laugh. Doesn't have to be Brad Pitt or have the body of an Adonis. Just make me laugh for real and I'm putty in your hands.

I do think that "not a racist" and "must have good hygiene" is setting the bar pretty low though, I mean, who wants a smelly bigot for a partner anyway??

Wondering why tattoo’s is a deal breaker?

Can we get some of the male lurkers for their lists? Could be interesting and contradictory.

Fussy eater, food is a huge part of my life and I just couldn't be with a fussy eater. The other one is he must be in employment, don't really care what job but must have one. Been several years since I was looking for a date but these are my top 2

I am married, but the thing that DH knows is the dealbreaker that will lead to divorce is if he wraps anything, specifically TV Remote Controls, in plastic.

(His dad did this to protect stuff, drove me nuts. Everything was neatly wrapped but especially remotes so the buttons wouldnt wear)

male lurker here my own list is pretty simple. Intelligent, confident, warm and caring. Oh and they must like the outdoors and music. After that I don't really mind.

@CrowleysBentley genuinely thought you wrote 'Must look like cats' and I was totally down with that :grin:

• ANY form of addiction, past or present
• Tory voter
• Daily Mail reader
• religious in any way
• being tight with money

All the obvious stuff after that, kindness and honesty etc etc should be standard.

Even as an ex-smoker I'm amazed only a small minority have included this in the dealbreakers; is it really so rare now that folk don't need to factor it in?

My own really boils down to just one: lack of empathy. For me, most of the rest follows from that

Wondering why tattoo’s is a deal breaker?

Because they are for morons.

Can we get some of the male lurkers for their lists?

I should imagine must be:

Female
Alive

Wow I have no tattoos, my DH has no tattoos but if I were on the dating scene I would be surprised in this day and age to find people without them....
My deal breakers - peeing with the door open,
Eating with the mouth open,
Being a home body.
Preferably with great diy skills and motivation.
Loves expanding their mind.
Wants to go out with the kids or just me.
No batshit family (ok.... everyone has a few batshit family members but more normal family than not).
Happy to join in Karaoke and go see musicals.

Over sexed

Because they are for morons

judgemental twats would be up there.

Also shorter than 5ft 10.

High pitched or squeaky voice.

Deal breakers:
-Lefty politics
-Smoker

I’m very left wing, and in a relationship.

I’m not sure I’d rule out a Tory voter though. I know a few people in relationships across the political spectrum. I am surprised it’s so left wing/remain here actually. I have family members who voted Brexit (we don’t talk about it though ). I also admit to massive prejudices about DM readers, but do in fact know a journalist who works for them and is not at all what you’d expect. I dunno...

Mine are more to do with not being a slob - being interested in the world around you.

Not a climate change denier
Not a misogynist
Understands the value of the arts to the human condition.
Has heard of houmous (I know someone who married a man in his thirties who’d never heard of it )
Isn’t an arsehole —- ooos that ones ages to judge in advance but there’s a lot of it about

Snorer

I'm married which is a good job because mine are awful
Must be vegan
Love cats
No dogs
No children
Non smoker
Not enjoy clubbing or 90s/modern music
Not have a sister
Not be close to grandparents or visit elderly relatives (I'm going to hell)
Not have nephews/nieces to visit

I'm amazed that people are counting having tattoos and kids as deal breakers! I'm not a massive fan of tattoos but they are very popular and they're not always an indicator of someone's quality as a partner.

If I were dating again I think I'd be more attracted to someone if they did have kids, as long as they were involved/co-parenting and loving as a father. I have two kids and I think I'd feel happier knowing I was dating someone who truly understands that the children would always come first and will always be my priority over them, and vice versa.

AlohaMolly

Picks and eats his own pubes?!

Nowt wrong with being honest and in control of your circumstances @VeganVeganVegan

Dealbreakers:

Smelly
Bad breath
Poor grammar / can’t spell/ lacks intelligence
Lots of tattoos
Smokes / takes drugs / alcohol dependent
Swears too much
Unkind
Controlling
Doesn’t look after health or physical appearance