To be annoyed that a joint house is not in my name

[stellavisionandunderstanding]

AIBU?

I sold my house in the UK and my husband and I bought a house together. We live abroad. His parents do everything and everything is passed by them. At the time I was focused on having our second child and before I knew it, his parents had taken him to an accountant to sort out the deeds and the paperwork.

I'm really cross about this as my rights by hanging my name on a house has been lost and this is not what I signed up to. I keep saying when do I sign something and then he finally told me what they'd gone and done.

He keeps saying we'll buy another flat in a few years and your name will be on it. It annoys me that this was done for tax reasons by his parents rather than protecting the right I had. I'd like to go back and do further study and now I can't show evidence for local frees rather than international. Please tell me I'm being unreasonable!

What sort of tax are they trying to reduce OP? I think you need to know more about what their goal is before getting to hot under the collar about it.

When I lived o/s and had investment properties, they were negatively geared. That meant the rental income didn't cover the cost of the property, so losses would be a deduction for my income tax assessment. The law of that Country stated only 1 person could write off the property losses, not two. In a couple of situation, it would be common for the person with the largest earnings and therefore income tax obligation, to use the property losses to reduce their income tax.

Is this what your partner and in laws are trying to achieve? If so, it is perfectly normal.

If you feel your financial contribution is not safe, go to independent solicitors and have a legal memorandum drawn up that details your financial arrangements as a couple.

You need to properly inform yourself of your rights OP. Not by asking your husband though. Other posters' reactions are likely to be coloured by assumptions and prejudices, like mine was, rather than real knowledge.

Don't immediately panic, but do get smart, as quickly as you can.

Is it his home country? (Does sound like it so far.) And how much money are we talking?

Has he ever owned property before? He might have claimed a first time buyer relief for stamp duty. That.might be the ‘less tax’.

Sorry just read the update about Oman! Oh shit op the women's rights in Oman aren't great I'm sure you know this right? Do you have support over there with you? Independent of his family?

Where is the property? On no basis can an accountant prepare a valid deed. A deed is stronger than a contract and can only be executed by a practising solicitor (other than a Will).

Sorry for the cross post re where your husband is from.

I'm pleased you're both British though tbh. How longterm is this move? How confident are you in your marriage? (ignoring this issue) And how do you get on with his parents?

He's stolen from you. See if you can find a British solicitor with rights to appear in the Omani courts. I'm not sure if the new property in his name alone is in Oman or in the UK, though, because I'm sure that would make a difference. The tax thing is an utter red herring. They're screwing you.

So you sold your own house and put that money towards buying the joint house and your name isn't on the deeds? That's outrageous. Did you have any money left over or did all your proceeds from your sale go to the new house?

Middle Eastern law here is irrelevant, you can get this sorted out very easily... but he has to consent to it.
It’s technically theft, yes.

They don’t recognise the 50/50 split after divorce though.

I think MrsNotNice may have identified the crucial point - you need to go and discuss this with a lawyer asap to confirm that this is true and find out what your options are to recover your investment. Do you think your DH knows this part of Oman law? Or his parents know it?

For clarification, OP - is the flat that you've invested in, in the UK? Were you married in the UK? I don't know enough about divorce law, but if you returned to the UK and initiated a divorce here, I'm thinking the 50:50 split would still apply?

I doubt there are any relevant tax implications, but if you're concerned that there may be a grain of truth in there, can you visit an accountant by yourself and ask them to talk you through the tax part?

I would see this as theft.
It also sounds like he's gaslighting you. What exactly should you be grateful for?
I would play your cards close to your chest and see a lawyer asap.

So as I understand it, you are currently in Oman, but the house that has been bought 50% with your money but 100% in his name is in the UK. And there is some kind of intent to buy another property (but a flat) and put that into your name.

I'm going to guess that this is about stamp duty. If you own only one property in the UK then you pay stamp duty at the standard rate. If you then buy a second property, the stamp duty is doubled.

So if you buy the first property jointly, it's the first property for both of you. And when you buy the second, it's the second for both of you and the stamp duty is doubled. Actually even if it is a second property for only one of you, the stamp duty is still doubled.

But if the first property is put in his name and you don't have a property, when you come to buy the second one in your name, it is your first property and the stamp duty is at the standard rate.

How much money you might save on this scheme depends on the value of the second property as stamp duty rates are on a sliding scale.

Its a fair enough scheme, except that it should have been explained to you beforehand and you should have had legal advice to protect your interest.

Clearly insisting on putting the first property into joint names now would destroy the scheme. The value of the scheme depends on the value of the second property.

One alternative option available to you would be for your husband to give you a mortgage on the first property for the value of your investment in it. Then you aren't named on the title deeds but you have real protection in the value of the property as your mortgage can be registered at the Land Registry and the property can't be sold without you releasing the mortgage.

How did the mortgage not caught onto it? Or the solicitors? You can't just go and purchase a house with someone else's money. I was grilled about where each bit of deposit came from. If part came from DH, it would show on bank statements and so he would have to be somehow involved afaik

Yes can you please talk us through every stage of how the money went from you to him.

I’m worried he might’ve done something along the way to cover his back and give himself more steak than he should.

Perhaps yes or perhaps no .

Also confirm your marriage is registered as civil in the Uk because that could be another way you are compromised.

This to me is theft. He needs to put all cards on the table otherwise you get legal advice. How long have you been in Oman for? Can you return to the uk and not return?l to Oman?

@stellavisionandunderstanding

I take it that the house is in the UK?

If you bought the house together and if it was originally in joint names on the "deeds" then you cannot have been taken off without signing something [or having your signature forged]. You can find out exactly what the situation is legally by going to the Land Registry website and getting an on-line print of the land registry documents. That is the starting point. You should be able to do so from anywhere in the world and I think it costs £12

As you sold the property you lived in to buy the property [and no doubt you can - wish some difficulty - prove that with the money into your bank and then to the house] you should have acquired rights. You will need quick "British" legal advice for that!

There is no "tax advantage" that I can see that would make it better to have the house in his name.

The involvement of "parents" worries me and I have this horrid feeling that this implies a family from an area of the world where the woman is totally worthless in their eyes. I hope that I am wrong

Our rental house is in my name only as I am in a lower tax band than my DH so it could be true, but the fact that this wasn't discussed with you, and it was all done behind your back, is ringing massive alarm bells.

Yes regardless of the details your rights of consent were disrespected and he needs to discuss everything with you Infront of the lawyer.

Worse case scanrio you need to go to notary public get him to sign a paper that he took your money and how much it was and where is it invested and get it signed. That shouldn’t cost you much.

But to be honest I would do more than that.

What happens if you try to bring your kids back? How will you stand legally? Maybe they've done this to prevent you ever taking the kids back to the UK. Who knows!

Get yourself some advice with a lawyer, invite your husband along to this meeting but you lead the questions, if you need to speak to a lawyer in more than one country do this.

You need to ensure that the jointly held assets are in both of your names. If your DH does intend to avoid stamp duty by having property in separate names, then put the existing property in your name and the promised property can go in his name.

Find out exactly what tax you are saving by doing this and if it is not a significant amount, be firm and say if he wants to risk not having things in his name in order to avoid tax, then he can take that risk but that you are not prepared to do this.

Get a clear paper trail of the money that was made from your property and was used to pay for the property that is now in your DH's name only. Make it completely clear to him that if he does not restore this property to you, that you will take whatever steps necessary to force him to do this.

Stay strong and don't let your property be taken from you.

He’s not a nice man at all. You’ve told him you’re unhappy with something and his reply is ‘my parents think it’s best’ that isn’t on at all.

I don't think I could trust someone who did this to me behind my back, and then acted in this manner. The trust would be gone, I'd be consulting a divorce solicitor.

To be honest his parents sound horrible.. to have expected him to steal your money and not inform you shows me that you are completely vulnerable.

Unless he has a bloody good explanation for this.

If you are of the Muslim faith, take him to a representative of your community of an imam and let him know beforehand that you had your money taken off you and let him have a word with him Infront of you.

I know by Islamic law this is a wifey recognised right for women. Financial.

There are many options for you OP. Don’t stay quiet plz

Hang on , you bought the flat from his parents? So you handed your money over to his parents, who (probably) then gave your husband a flat? Where are you?
I wouldn’t be at all happy about this