How would you feel if you received this email?

[SamCam349]

Is this (below) a nice email to receive? What would you think of the sender who wrote it??

‘I will reluctantly speak to you next Tuesday to attempt to address your discriminatory actions. As I mentioned last week, I, personally, do not consider you to be that important, and I would not be entertaining this call were your manager not also be participating.’

It sounds like someone is responding to being harangued/ bullied....
And then they were pushed into a meeting

It's very unprofessionally written but...
in a scenario where you acted in a very discriminatory way, causing the person to feel belittled or distraught, I can see why they want to make the point that you - and your opinions - aren't important to them. The fact that they'll meet only with your manager present implies to me that they don't want to accept an apology from you and would rather just blank you, but are being forced to meet you by management. It sounds like they are hurt, angry and still emotional. And that email is to make you feel the same.

Hard to say without knowing what you've done but if you're meeting them to make amends or ensure you can all work/coexist I'd suggest you brutally examine your behaviour and if necessary go in prepare to make a genuinely sincere apology and perhaps even some ideas of what you could do to change/more proactively make amends.

I’d feel worried if I received this email and I’d think the sender was in a state of high emotion. I’d assume being told I was not important was designed to wound me.

Is it nice is the weirdest question you could ask about that email snippet.

It's obvious that it's not intended to be nice.

Being nice is a very odd criteria to be holding above all others especially in a work context.

It's a very odd, unprofessional, awkwardly phrased bit of of writing. However it does make me wonder what the recipient did! Is the sender professionally offended and hoping to escape appropriate work place disciplinary action or to be awarded an undeserved promotion or unmerited special treatment and pissed off that the recipient has put a spanner in the works? Or has the recipient done or said something horribly inappropriate, offensive and discriminatory (racist, sexist, homophobic).

However it's impossible to tell from the email who is in the right, all the email expresses is that the sender is pretty arrogant and fairly unprofessional and has a very clumsy writing style.

I agree with @Savingforarainyday. At first I read it as unprofessional but then I got thinking of scenarios where it would not be unprofessional. For example, the sender was bullied or harassed in some way and the recipient is unapologetic, insensitive and/or pompous.

I don't think the OP is coming back. I think one of two things has now happened.

1. OP was the sender and now feels shit because the responses has been overwhelmingly in favour of it being an unpleasant email.

1. OP was the recipient. She won't tell us the back story of what she actually did to warrant such s strong response, but is looking for validation that the email wasn't nice and is now going to focus on that rather than considering that actions have consequences (never mind what I did, look at what they did to me).

Have not has*

Given the OP’s name, I think this email must be from the Queen and the backstory is that issue about David Cameron blabbing about her in his new book. She was apparently ‘displeased’ so has obvs bashed out this pissy email.

There you go everyone, problem solved

‘Were your manager not also be’?

Er, what? Gobbledegook.

Nasty email. Very unprofessional and rude. With grammar and spelling mistakes too. Awful.

I'd think that they were being downright nasty but it would depend on why they were sending it.

The email is rude, sneering, unprofessional, biased, generally unpleasant and very badly written and may be grounds for complaint itself but other than that it's fine 🙄

Not a professional email in any way but OP, come back, maybe we can help?

Have you been discriminated against OP?
Has your line manager called a meeting?
Are you telling him/her that you will be attending because his/her own manager is going to be there?

Context is everything OP.
The sender of the e-mail is justifiably pissed off or an arse.
Which one depends entirely on why it was sent and who to.

The problem is that even if the sender is justified and has been discriminated against, they could have handed the other person an out.

Let's say for example the OP is the sender. She was overlooked for promotion and believes it's because she is a woman, because of skin colour, sexual orientation etc.

She has basically just given the other person proof that the reason they didnt get the promotion is because she is unprofessional. Not because of discrimination.

And who knows. The person who is being accused of discrimination, could infact be in the right. In which case, the sender needs to be worried about their job.

I'm sure the sender of the e-mail has English as a second or third language, it is so badly written and almost nonsensical. It's definitely hostile.

I assumed the OP had sent the email.not that she received it. And that the person who received it had complained about the tone of it. Which is why the OP said in one of her earlier posts that she wanted feedback on the tone of the email.

I genuinely don't see how anyone could read that email and think that it is anything but nasty? You may as well just have written 'I think you are a piece of shit who I don't want to talk to, but seeing as I have an opportunity to get you in trouble with your manager I will' 🤦‍♀️

Wow that is one aggressive email!

It sounds like the type of message you send whilst being p..sed of, without really thinking what you are writing, and not reading it before you send it.

The first sentence isn’t so bad, apart from the word ‘reluctantly’, which could mean the sender doesn’t think it warrants a meeting, or doesn’t want to be involved.

The second sentence is rude and patronising. You may think that an employer is not worthwhile, but you don’t state it. That could be perceived as bullying, and the recipient could complain to hr about it.

Bird - I also wondered if English is the persons second language.

A lot of people are saying that if she was on the receiving end of it, she must've done something really bad, so the 'I really am a piss of shit' could equally apply as the receiver.

That's how I read the OP's post. It's a rude and unprofessional email. I worked with an aggressive, manipulative bully for 3 years. I refused mediation because I knew she'd manipulate the situation and the managers routinely failed to see what she was like. The tone of that email is what it was like in my head. However, I would never have left any evidence of this as it would have come back to me.

So, yes the email is rude but under who knows what provocation? But even when provoked, FGS don't put stuff like that in writing, or you put yourself in the wrong too.

Well that meeting sounds like it’s going to be a barrel of laughs which ever party in it you are!

Very hostile and aggressive. Of course, the fact that @SamCam349 refuses to provide any context makes it difficult to assess but appears that OP sent the email (bad doggy) rather than received it.

I suspect the call will now not happen, since no one in their right mind would want to speak to the sender after that and/or the manager involved would advise against it.

I will reluctantly speak to you next Tuesday

So the only valid reply to this is "See You Next Tuesday"

( C. U. Next Tuesday )