75% of mothers

[user87382294757]

...do all of the housework and childcare related tasks - no matter how many hours they work outside of this

I was a bit depressed to read this in the Independent newspaper today.

I wondered how mush of this rings true in your experience?

Sadly true in my house, not quite sure how it happened. When I went back to work pt after DS was born I had good intentions about splitting tasks fairly, but somehow 11 years later I do everything 😔

I cook and do food shop and bit of cleaning along with all laundry, all organising and management of monthly outgoings- i was only work part-time and actually am having a work break now. DH is working more but DH does proper weekly clean, garden, hedges at front, big jobs.

DH does nothing around the house. Can't even shut a fucking cupboard after himself. Does do the school runs though but that's it. I work more hours.

Nah, not in our home. Not sure where those figures are from.

Oh I certainly believe it. My ex was lazy turd. I did 90% of housework and about 70% childcare. He didnt work either. Which is why he's an ex. I now do it all, but I'm very happily single and not full of resentment.

I would say 50/50 with chores. Ans we have a cleaner.

I'm not sure I believe this survey. 50/50 in this house

Based on what survey? They could have only asked 20 people. I always wonder where this random info comes from - no one’s ever gathered my opinions on these things...

My husband will clean and tidy (he's tidier than I) but it's all the renemvering, organising, buying, washing, ironing, letter organising, school communicating etc that he just waits for me to direct him to do. I HATE it and would love to be the one who didnt gave to be the household manager. He doesn't see it because he does do some cleaning....aaargh!

@Poolbridge - your essay sounds like my marriage before I kicked him out!

I now do 100% of these chores, but without a lazy man child mooching around, my workload has halved. Hope you’re enjoying the freedom!

Lots of statistics sadly back this up. I’d recommend the book ‘delusions of gender’ by Cordelia Fine if any of you want to back up your feminist rage with facts and figures- it cites an article which says women do most of the housework where the man earns more. However, as wages become more equal between spouses, men take on more housework. But it’s when women start to earn more that it gets weird- men start to do less! Apparently it’s because they feel emasculated by a higher earning wife and housework is just an insult too far!

I’d be interested to see how many MNers who say they split housework 50/50 earn the same as their husbands?

True dat

My husband works away all week, I work pt. He put his work clothes in the machine when he gets home, I’ll pop it on the line if it’s nice weather (I hate the way he pegs out). He will put the hoover now and again and possibly make a bacon sandwich for breakfast.....that is it. I do absofuckinglutely everything else. Except cut the grass, we pay someone to do that. 🙈🤬

Was true for me. No matter what I did, said, or how much I begged he did nothing, absolutly nothing and even complained that I didn't do a good enough job. BTW we both had full-time jobs.His gran hadn't work, neither did his mum, it was just so ingrained in him that women serve men. This is the main reason I ended up divorcing him.

I have been with DH for 21 years, married for 14. There is not a single month in all that time I havent paid into the joint account, I have worked and worked at getting him to do his share. I would say it is at absolute best 60-40 but tbh 75-25 is probrably closer to reality. We have a joint account, we have timetables, we have spreadsheets we have endless bloody discussions about it. DH is not a bad man (if a bit lazy and selfish) but the gender stereotypes are just so strong.

We also have a cleaner

Is that UK only? I thin here they are relatively shared but in some other countries men next to nothing of childcare and house work

True in my home, but I have finally (now kids are grown up) stopped doing everything and if no one else can be arsed, neither can I.

in some other countries men next to nothing of childcare and house work

Which countries?

Because in some other countries men do a lot more.

Well my children are grown up and have left home. I did most of the child care plus all the household jobs plus mowing the lawn. I did insist that DH picked one child up from Guides and the other from Scouts etc.

I do all the household chores, cleaning, washing etc plus cooking, some of the gardening and organise workmen to come to the house when there are any jobs that need doing. I work part time in a school so I do have the school holidays off.

Some of the comments on here are clearly boasting and at least one is an outright lie.

I've only met one woman who this didn't apply to and she had a cleaner... for those saying "oh my hubby does it all" either he doesn't or you're doing just about everything else or have a specific reason why.

Men will never willingly clean unless they have OCD or are single parents.

For context, my DH helps but I do the bulk.

@Poolbridge I hope you are happy now.
My husband doesn’t do much of the housework and reading your story I realised that I do everything on your list. but he is good with finances. He’s the one keeping us above water.

@FelicisNox I agree with you.

I also organise the payment of bills and pay his credit card bill from the joint account because he is unable to get to a bank during the week.

Dh does nothing in my household, I do everything and it has been a bone of contention for a long time! He doesn’t have a bloody clue

Men will never willingly clean unless they have OCD or are single parents

DH does his share of cleaning. This is neither a boast nor a lie. I don’t know if he does it ‘willingly’... about as willingly as I do I guess. It’s a chore that needs to be done, so we both do it.