Would you move 150-200 miles away to be able to afford your dream home?

[bigdecsions]

Hi everyone,
As the title suggests, we live in London (not the best place in London either ) that's where I've always lived and grown up its my comfort zone. All my family and friends are here too. We have 4dc and live in a 3 bed, which we can extend to make a 4 bed. It's on a main road so parking is available on the side roads. By no means is this our dream home, but it is what it is. We've done work to it and made it in to our home which we love. Kids are at a good school too.
2 miles away would be our ideal location but it's far too expensive, anywhere around here is, is have to extend our mortgage and still only get a 3 bed but in a nicer location and most houses only have 1 reception too making it feel smaller as we have 2.

Anyway we have thought about moving further north, we've looked at a few places but all are between 150-200 miles north of us 3-4 hour drive. We are able to afford our dream home in those areas and schools are good too. But I'm so worried about loving as I've always lived here. What if we don't like it after the novelty has worn off? Has anyone loved that far just to be able to afford their dream home? I just can't decide if it's right for us to do, also if we move we definitely won't be able to come back if we don't like it as we'd be priced out. I don't want to keep changing kids schools either. I think the main fear comes from always living here.
Really struggling to decide but can't get the dream house we saw out of my head .
Any suggestions? Sorry this post is so long xx

@Drabarni yes that's true, having extra rooms makes a lot of difference. Good luck to you

Honestly no , I wouldn’t move away from my family for a house . Your children won’t be there for ever and then your current house will feel huge . Can you afford to spend some money making it perfect ?

@Drabarni just wandering is there a particular reason you move around it just an adventure. I wish we adventured like that before kids were at school

And isn’t London supposed to be the best place in the world to live ? Don’t do it

@PurpleTigerLove If we don't move then we will spend money on it. It's just not that perfect ideal family home , there's no parking for one so I have to park on side roads a bit of a walk away I've been here 6 years though and as you can imagine it's so horrible walking with shopping and kids. Sometimes I drive around for ages 30 mins even just to find a parking.

We moved out from West London to Binfield/Bracknell 6 years ago and I love it so much more than I expected, and can still get to London easily. Reading maybe?

I have made loads of amazing friends who are a great support. My sister moved at a similar time which helped. We moved purely to afford a bigger family home. We could easily be mortgage free further away but it was a good compromise for us to be still in the South East but out of London (we could only afford a one bed flat there and we have a 4 bed detached here for a similar price).

It’s a tricky one, I really get the problem with affordability in London and the idea of cashing in and getting more space is very appealing, but I know from my own experience it comes with compromises.
I think having children helps, as they are a real way of entering into a new community and hopefully will give you lots of reasons to join in with things if you move.
We moved 50 miles north of London, bought a much bigger house (renovation project we wanted) I love the house, it’s brilliant, perfect in so many ways, but and it’s a big but, after 6 quite difficult years we really still do not fit in here, we miss our friends, miss London and feel very disconnected from where we live. Our children were teenagers when we moved and did not go to school locally so we did not have the in roads to the local community.
I’ve also found very few like minded people, especially with the whole Brexit thing, I’m a North london lefty and feel like a fish out of water, sad but true, some of it of my own making I know, but it is the reality I live.
My DCs are off to university in a few weeks and we will be putting our lovely house up for sale and will be moving to pastures new.
You need more than a nice house to make you happy.

If you are genuinely happy in your relationship then yes. Definitely.

If not.

No.

I've just read the post before mine.

With that in mind I'd move far away and fly home

Some schools have already started the GCSE curriculum in Yr 9. Is your eldest really ok about the idea of leaving friends and relocating?

I wouldn’t leave your family, I don’t think.

Have you looked at jobs and salaries?

Do remember that it won't be too many years until your oldest dc may be leaving home. We are moving (within town) but we probably wouldn't have bought this house ten years ago as if they all have their own rooms they are on different levels, and repurposing a room, but the dc all love it and accept that come university time the accommodation will be flexible.

If you don't often go beyond your area would somewhere in London commuter belt suit you? Think how often do you go more than 3 miles from home. I wouldn't necessarily let the ethnic mix be too much of a concern as many big towns have diverse populations now, however I guess it depends how comfortable you are mixing outside of your ethnicity, are most of your friends also Asian or do you have a mixture of friends.

Would any of your family also consider the move? It is difficult moving with older children as they are less likely to form strong roots. Having said that the house doesn't need to fit them for as many years.

Around 12 years ago I was working as police staff in Scotland. The Scottish Police College was actually having to run 'conversion' courses for cops moving north to Scottish forces. I remember one in particular - a Met inspector taking a rank drop to constable and feeling that it was balanced by being able to afford a better family home and a shorter journey to work. Oh, and less violence to deal with on a regular basis at work.

@Dongdingdong maybe not a dream home but you get 4 beds for 350k have a check on right move

I just did a search on Rightmove for four-bedroom properties in Brighton with a maximum budget of £350k.

11 properties came up, but one is a houseboat and five are discounted for over-65s. So that leaves you just five properties to choose from.

By contrast, if I search for four-bed properties in Brighton with no maximum budget, the search returns 401 results.

If I were you I’d look for a location where your budget gives you a much wider selection of properties to choose from.

If you're looking at Manchester, what about Bury? Just outside but on the tram link (metrolink) so really probably as near as Urmston etc that you've mentioned. You can pickup a 5 bed for £350k. Come North, we're lovely 😊

Bolton Road, Bury
www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-83537399.html

We did, from winchester to a tiny village in Wales. I love it and have never regretted it!

It took a while to make friends, but it happened.

@TheBrockmans I definitely have a good mix of friends ethnicity wise it's just that I don't want to feel the only Asian in town if you know what I mean. It feels strange even thinking that but being born and bred in London it's something I've never had to consider before

@Sforsh49 we looked at Bolton, the problem was it didn't seem to have many good secondary schools and that's a must for us.

@MyKingdomforaNameChange that sounds amazing well done

I'm from Manchester and would never go back. I now live in Lincolnshire, very close to Nottingham (I actually work in Nottingham) and I completely love the area. Great for families, amazing National trust sites, countryside to fill your boots with, Nottingham is a buzzing, thriving city and Lincoln is beautiful!! You have the east coast right on your doorstep and London is easy to get to also! It's actually a perfect location OP...I would highly recommend 👌🏻

My eyes!! That house in Bury is hideous.

Trafford does have good secondary schools but as I understand it, there's a shortage of places and arriving mid year is difficult.

@northernknickers aww that's good to hear thank you

@MerryChristmasHarry yes I've heard that too. Can't win can I 😩

You don't mention anything about jobs? Nottingham is cheap but definitely won't have the same opportunities jobs wise as Manchester,Birmingham etc.

It does have relatively cheap housing, a vibrant city centre and shops, plenty of leisure facilities, theatres, music venues, sports venues, countryside on the doorstep, 2 good universities, 1 hour 40 to central London on the train (and on a weekend can be relatively cheap)

I wouldn’t underestimate the impact of long far from your family. I grew up in London abd couldn’t wait to leave. We now live in W Yorkshire, have done for 20 years. The DC are 7 and 11. Both sets of GPs are in the SW of England 4-6 hours away. Every second of childcare and babysitting we’ve ever had we’ve had to arrange and pay for, and take what’s available. My DC have realised that their GP’s are never going to come to their school concerts, birthday parties or sports matches. We spend a lot of our school holidays travelling to see family and then we have to stay a few days’- it’s a kind of “best behaviour” relationship. If DH or I is away, the other has to endure that they get home in time to pick up the dc as we have no back up - this can mean finishing very early at times, and constantly taking a chance on the state of the M1 south of Leeds. We have friends, many friends, but they mostly have local family and long standing school friends who always come first. I don’t think your dream home would be so dreamy if you removed your friends and family.

@BikeRunSki yes I guess that's something to think about. I think the majority are saying the same as you. Thanks