Would you move 150-200 miles away to be able to afford your dream home?

[bigdecsions]

Hi everyone,
As the title suggests, we live in London (not the best place in London either ) that's where I've always lived and grown up its my comfort zone. All my family and friends are here too. We have 4dc and live in a 3 bed, which we can extend to make a 4 bed. It's on a main road so parking is available on the side roads. By no means is this our dream home, but it is what it is. We've done work to it and made it in to our home which we love. Kids are at a good school too.
2 miles away would be our ideal location but it's far too expensive, anywhere around here is, is have to extend our mortgage and still only get a 3 bed but in a nicer location and most houses only have 1 reception too making it feel smaller as we have 2.

Anyway we have thought about moving further north, we've looked at a few places but all are between 150-200 miles north of us 3-4 hour drive. We are able to afford our dream home in those areas and schools are good too. But I'm so worried about loving as I've always lived here. What if we don't like it after the novelty has worn off? Has anyone loved that far just to be able to afford their dream home? I just can't decide if it's right for us to do, also if we move we definitely won't be able to come back if we don't like it as we'd be priced out. I don't want to keep changing kids schools either. I think the main fear comes from always living here.
Really struggling to decide but can't get the dream house we saw out of my head .
Any suggestions? Sorry this post is so long xx

Ah well then my little village probably won't suit that.
But I sent you a PM!

I love the north and there are many good reasons to move there but in your case it makes no sense. You love your home, it's big enough, it's near friends and family - important when you have four kids! The kids are in good schools. Really, what is the problem? You want a nicer house than the one you love? We all want more - the nicer place down the road that's out of reach - but that's just the human condition. I'd stay put and count your blessings, rather than disrupt the kids schooling, community, identity etc for a different building.

@hellsbellsmelons thank you I'll check your message

Also while it's true that northerners can be very friendly, they can also not be. There was a southern boy at my secondary and he was never really accepted unfortunately. Hopefully you'd be luckier and find somewhere less insular but it happens.

@bigdecsions how old are the rest of your children? Which ones share a bedroom and even if you made your house a 4 bed with 4 children 2 will still have to share?

Our last house was a lovely house for a toddler and baby but we knew that we wanted a 4 bed (office for Dh) and had to move for a decent secondary school and parking was an issue with only 1 car space on the drives so everyone was nudging for space outside their houses.

This house is a 4 bed detached with a double garage which we converted into a playroom whilst retaining storage for all the garden stuff. One wall of the playroom has a 4m run of storage for all coats, bags, shoes, ironing board, games, toys, paper you name it is in there. The children are now 13 and 16. We have lived here 8 years. They have desks with computers on in the playroom so their rooms are for reading and sleeping.

I think you need to look at jobs first, then areas and schools. You can make new friends.

If you think of an area you are interested in then post on here in Property/Diy for people's opinions rather than AIBU.

Before we relocated here we took some time out to visit in the week rather than just see it at the weekend and drove around areas making notes. We loved one school, drove to it and parked up. A couple were dropping a child in late (10am) and so we asked them what they thought of the school, they said it's good but if you want outstanding then X school is amazing. We moved into that catchment, absolutely amazing school. No regrets.

We had friends who loved the area they lived in especially their friends, passed up an opportunity to relocate job wise, then the 3 sets of friends they had stayed for upped and relocated to all different parts of the UK. They were beyond gutted.

In your shoes, no. This is because it sounds like you have a decent quality of life already. You would have an even better one in the north but the push factors aren't there. In the position of a lot of Londoners, yes. But you aren't bringing up kids squashed into a crappy private rental flat in Zone 7 million, kids stuck at a school miles away, having to work many more hours between you than you can manage etc.

@JetPlanesMeeting the children are 13,10,5,2 we could potentially get a 5 bed from what we've seen in a new build so that would be great, otherwise the 2 sharing would be the 5 and 10 year old and they are happy with that.

@Lemonbarley60 that sounds amazing, where did you move from and to?

No.

I had a feeling most people would have said yes move and you can make friends etc. Lots of thinking to do

150-200 miles - bitch of a commute.

It totally depends on where you're moving to.

Brexit is going to make a massive difference to infrastructure. Have a look how where you're going to is going to fair when the funding is coming from the Government.

It's the lack of transport that cuts down on job opportunities in many Northern places. The lower wages make car ownership difficult.

@didireallysaythat true but will only commute once a month at the most to see family

@Ponoka7 that's true but how will
I know high cities will be most affected by Brexit. I mean If we move it will be next year so we will get a better idea by then I guess. I mentioned above the places we are considering are Manchester, Leeds, Nottingham and derby

@bigdecsions - sorry I probably missed it in the thread. You can move both your jobs to the new location? Very jealous! There's no way I'd live in the South but that's where my job is. Travelling 200 mike's every Friday night and Sunday evening wouldn't be too bad, but then there's the kids sports at the weekend ....

@didireallysaythat I've been a SAHM for the last year and probably for another year then I could find work up north. My husband company could easily transfer him. He would have to take a small pay cut but that should affect affordability

@didireallysaythat it's so much harder with kids involved

Do not do it. Especially if you are unsure now. I moved north from south for two 'good' reasons and only stopped being homesick after about five years. Thought about moving back but was priced out. Community, friends and family are everything. I have found community and friends here but it still doesn't feel like home.

@bigdecsions haha I know right! We're awful with heat. We can't holiday anywhere hot 😂

@RedRec that's what I'm
Scared of would you go back now though given an option?

@Purplerain16 😂😂

bigdecisions, I would still go back if the conditions were right, but do not feel the urgent pull any more, and have ties that bind me here now. I should have mentioned that I have two teenage children who settled quickly and easily and love it here, so that is of course a big factor. I have been here six years now.
I just wish we had stayed put in the first place.
All the best with your decision making.

100% yes

Ive done it and I'm doing it again. I'm off to the west country now going deep rural. I work in the NHS so it's easy to move where I like.
It isn't for everyone and it doesn't sound like it's for you.
I love being isolated and I love my own company but if you like shopping, cafes, company, friends and family you will hate it.
Why move away from everyone you like and know while the children are still at home.
Teenagers hate rural areas, they like to be in the middle of all the excitement.
I'm moving from my current seaside home because its like nursing home on sea with all the very old folk here and I want to be in a mixed age group community.