DDs hair is disgusting and rubbish

[radioactiveimagination]

Had DD4 yes hair cut into cute bob yesterday. In preparation for starting school next week. All good. This morning though she is inconsolable, hates it, is disgusting (wants it long like a princess 🙄). I'm at a loss what to say and feel so guilty! What can I say to make it better? 'It'll grow back' is not cutting it.

I remember when my mum cut my hair short. She was a hairdresser. I was about 13 I think. She had been asking me for weeks if she could cut it short, like a ruby rose style. I asked for some layers, because that’s what was in fashion in school at the time and she cut it purposefully in a mess, nothing like I wanted, so that I would finally allow her to cut it the was she wanted. So she got her way and I cried for weeks about it. Wore a hat to school to hide it.

I feel for her. Bless her little heart. It’s a bit change to cut your hair off. She will grow to love it eventually I’m sure. In the mean time, she could try different styles, clips, hair bands, or, depending on age, she could get hair extensions. Xx

I bet she looks gorgeous and really on trend , it is disgusting that we have so much emphasis on long luscious flowing hair , even I’ve fallen into the extensions trap when my real hair is so much easier in a bob.my 7 year old has long curly hair it’s hard work because of the curls but I know if she cut it even at 7 she would get told she looks like a boy too x

It sounds as though the OP's daughter has got over her haircut. I am sure it is very nice.

One of those hair clips with a longer plait on it might suffice for a while maybe??

I wanted my hair cut at the same time - and I enjoyed it.

Unfortunately, every other girl at school had long hair and a thick fringe with pretty hair clips and bands. So my mother decided to let it grow - or as I prefer to term it, never pay to have it cut again.

I never had pretty bands - she used rubber bands that stuck in my hair through the day and overnight and I remember screaming and yelling as she ripped the brush over my head every morning.

When I was 9, my granddad asked me what I wanted for my birthday, as I didn't get presents from anybody. I said 'a haircut'.

I got a short back and sides and loved it. However, being assumed to be a boy angered her, so I went back to long hair afterwards, other than a brief period of undercut and from 21, colouring it whatever the hell I felt like.

These days, it's long, but DP cuts it when it gets past my bra strap - mainly because I was told by my mother on my 40th birthday, I had to cut it short like she did. She suggested I went to her hairdresser (she'd gone every 8 weeks throughout my childhood for exactly the same style), as she could make the woman cut it to an inch and a half long and perm it on tight rollers, even though the hairdresser didn't really want to do it.

Anyhow, venting over - buy pretty clip in slides and 'enjoy' how easy it is to get headlice out.

She'll like it again.

She'll get over it just give her a cuddle and tell her how beautiful she is and get her some lovely clips and headbands for while she waits.
Re princesses, Rapunzel gets her hair cut short at the end of Tangled and is much happier.
Next time you brush it say wow that was so quick what fun thing do you want to do with the time we saved.

p.s. my daughter is the other extreme and likes her hair really short and badgered me for years to get a crop which looks fab.

Had similar with my dd when she was 9. She went for a long bob and it looked fab. Ten minutes after leaving the salon she was in tears saying how awful it was and that she really regretted it. It’s taken two years to finally get it to a length she’s happy with! All I could do at the time was tell her it was a really lovely cut and that she looked great but tried not to dwell on it. Good luck OP

I was always forced to have a bob and dont see how they are practical at all, curling all round your face when it rains, curling round your face trying to do school work cant tie it up for anything?

God - yes a Bob is such a high maintenance hair style

@formerbabe - you have it down to a tee 😂✔️👍

This thread terrifies me. My DD5 had short hair as a toddler as it was more practical. She then said she wanted to grow it long ‘like Elsa’ so it’s now quite long & straight. She’s now mentioned several times that she wants it cut short, I’m happy with that but very worried that she’ll change her mind the next day. She doesn’t mind having it washed or brushed & always wants to try different styles of plaits etc, so there’s no real upside if she doesn’t like it.

Also the cut she’s described sounds like something off a cartoon - short at the back with a long asymmetric fringe - a bit sophisticated for a little kid?!

so there’s no real upside if she doesn’t like it

The upside is she learns that it’s just a haircut and it will grow.

Show her lots of pictures until she can clearly see the cut she wants. Mine currently wants similar i think, but shaved at one side. That will have to wait till school hols . At least mine has had a pixie crop before and is confident enough for that should an asymetric style not work.

zippey You’ve only just seen a photo of Megan Markle?!

or, depending on age, she could get hair extensions

The OP's daughter is 4. You have to be joking.

@NoSquirrels, my little girls both had their hair cut on the last day of the school term for the Little Princess Trust. The seven year old donated 16 inches and the 5 year old 10 inches. An amazing charity.
They both sport swishy little Bob's now and love them.
I however do actually miss brushing and plaiting their hair, but every time I think about that I remember the difference their hair will make to a child living with cancer.

I'm glad your daughter has got used to her new haircut OP.

Shelby2010 Let her cut it. I dithered for ages before letting DD(7) cut her hair because everyone said she'll regret it. She loves it so much and it sounds similar to what your DD wants.

When my DDs were little any talk of being a princess was dragged back to how boring being a real princess is, having to look 'pretty' all the time and only having value in the marriage market. Far more fun to be an explorer/scientist/athlete/engineer/writer/doctor/historian/whatever. If they asked if they were beautiful we told them we loved them and therefore thought they were beautiful, they think it's hilarious that I think DH is beautiful.

As small children they had bobs and any complaints about brushing I told them they could get it cut and any request for it being longer they were told if they could look after it themselves they could grow it. Now they are 10 and 11 one has a lob and the other a pixie.

My daughter with a pixie has a similar experience to bluebluezoo's daughter, people challenge it the whole time. She doesn't mind other children asking 'are you a boy or a girl?' because those that ask generally listen to the answer. But she has had adults tell her she is not a girl (her DSis has had to step in) and even worse has to put up with people assuming she's trans (she's completely secure in her sex). At 11 we can have good discussions about gender stereotypes and she is quite confident in defending herself and doesn't want longer hair but it's bloody ridiculous that it has come to this.

Also the cut she’s described sounds like something off a cartoon - short at the back with a long asymmetric fringe - a bit sophisticated for a little kid?!

That's basically what My DD has, an asymmetric pixie. She looks awesome, big blue eyes and a heart shaped face.

Meghan Markle hasn’t got short hair has she? Or have I missed a haircut? Diana obviously did.
I cut my hair short in my early twenties as my then boyfriend liked it. I hated it, grew it back and 5he thought of ever having short hair again fills me with horror. When I’m old I’ll put it up in a chignon! Now I’m over40 my mother nags me to cut it into a bob but no way.

When I was 4 my mum
Took me to her uncle who was a barber. I looked like a boy (I remember being on holiday and people referring to me as he). I was not impressed. Much worse than a bob which will grow out quickly.

Tell her, in a bob she will be able to wear her hair down. Any longer and it will need to be tied back (for fear of nits).

My DD had 'princess hair' as her nanny called it. It was a permanent, ridiculously long (past her bum) and thick mess that she wouldn't let me have cut. I spent almost 6 years puliing it into tight plaits, buns etc. and dousing liberally in tea tree to avoid the nits that were warned of in the dreaded weekly infestation letter! I finally convinced her in the day before her 9th birthday that it would still look pretty a bit shorter. It's still long, (past shoulder blades) but I had it attacked with the thinning scissors too so it doesn't take an hour to dry. It's been like this for a few months now and she's really impressed because by removing the weight, she's found natural curls. Nanny wasn't happy, but she couldn't be bothered with maintenance and didn't brush and wash properly when she stayed with her, so I didn't particularly value that opinion.

As small children they had bobs and any complaints about brushing I told them they could get it cut and any request for it being longer they were told if they could look after it themselves they could grow it

So, like it or lump it basically. Sounds very controlling to me...

Diana had short hair

I haven't got any photos of me when I was young.

Buy I did find a class photo from when I was in primary school on Friends Reunited

All the girls had 2 bunches or plaits framing their face, all the boys had shortish hair styles.

Asked my children if they could spot mummy as a 5 year old.

They couldn't see any girl who looked like me so I pointed to the kid at the end of the row.
They had to be convinced the kid in the picture was a girl. I. had to point to the skirt I was wearing to back me up.