DDs hair is disgusting and rubbish

[radioactiveimagination]

Had DD4 yes hair cut into cute bob yesterday. In preparation for starting school next week. All good. This morning though she is inconsolable, hates it, is disgusting (wants it long like a princess 🙄). I'm at a loss what to say and feel so guilty! What can I say to make it better? 'It'll grow back' is not cutting it.

@bluebluezoo god my daughter has this too. She is 8 with a pixie cut and it is constant talk about her being a boy, why is he wearing that? That can’t be his name, that’s a girl’s name. And last week she was told off by a woman in the ladies’ toilet for being in there and that she ought to be in the gents. She was so upset. But she loves her short hair and doesn’t want to grow it. She doesn’t even mind if people ask if she’s a boy, as long as they accept the answer.

All three of my dds had short bobs at 4 and fashion conscious dd17 has just had a bob cut.

When I was about that age or a bit younger I was taken to the hairdresser and shown a magazine full of pictures of little girls' haircuts and asked to pick one. I didn't have a hot clue what was going on so jabbed at a random picture and ended up with a "boy cut", then sat good as gold whilst she was doing it, watching it happen in the mirror, then burst into tears at the end. My mum was mystified. I remember being furious with her for years for thinking she should never have let a toddler pick their own haircut You can't win OP, it's a rite of passage! I agree with a new sparkly Alice band, a matter-of-fact attitude, and it'll blow over by tomorrow.

Get her a red hairband and tell her she looks like snow white, the first and most important Disney princess.

I hate short hair. Growing up was forced to have a bob. Despised it. Now my hairdresser has been told that, if I ask her to cut my hair off, she's not to do it. Nearly did it one day when I was in a bad state over work. Needed a change - hair is easy to change. If I really want it cut short (unlikely!) I have to ask multiple visits.

I'll add, we were never raised with that princess nonsense. I just prefer healthy, long hair.

We love the Moana film and songs and when she is a little girl at the beginning of the film her hair is short.
I have the opposite issue. We went for a play date and my DD’s bestie had a new bob. My DD begged to have her hair cut the same.
We went to the hairdressers and after lots of ‘are you sure’ she had her hair cut into a shortish bob.
She loves it and loves being like her best friend. I hate it! She doesn’t look like ‘her’ anymore...
I’m sure I’ll get used to it.
Do any of her friends have short hair? When she gets to school, if you see anyone you know with short hair you can make a fuss of it and say how lovely it is to have new hair for a new school year.

I remember my DM used to get my haircut too short. Every. Single. Time.

She was very frugal and sensible was my mum, she thought the shorter the better, it'll last longer. But the short haircuts used to make me so miserable, when all I wanted was plaits and ponytails like my friends.

Dd is 9 and only ever had a trim as she likes long hair. Id be shocked if she chose to cut it
I love long hair and last time it was at my shoulders I was 10, it had just been "trimmed" from half way down my back. I was hysterical, never trusted another hairdresser or my parents again but they lied and said trim which I was ok with but it was no trim at all.

For me it's no princess thing, I just like the length, easier to manage too
Dd loves frozen so her hair is Elsa hair lol

Isn't a bob really time consuming having to blow dry the bob in every morning and getting it to stay in during the day

Pamper the hair - blow dry and nice clips. She’s four, she’ll get over it quickly, if you don’t fuss too much

I am nearly 60. I don't think I ever got over having my hair cut when I was 4

I wasn't a great looking child and the only nice part about me was my hair.

My son (16) later told me that yes, certain haircuts do attract snide or offensive remarks and that bobs are the prime target. He keeps himself to himself and doesn’t understand why either but confirmed it is a problem.

He's probably referring to the "I want to see the manager" cut.

www.google.com/search?q=i+want+to+see+the+manager+haircut&oq=I+want+to+see+the+manager&aqs=chrome.1.69i57j0l5.15345j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8

Google image "The I want to see the manager haircut"

What interest would a 16 year old boy have in a 4 year old's hair and how acceptable it is? He'd have no idea about primary school girls and their hair!

On Reddit..popular with 16 year old boys, there's a lot of jokes about the "I want to see the manager" cut. it's supposedly a hairstyle seen on a lot of entitled women in their 30s and 40s who complain a lot.

My mother also took me for a trim every 6 weeks.

She used to warn the hairdresser's as I had to be held in the chair by my mother then another hairdresser would hold my head in a vice grip so the hairdresser could cut my hair.

I remember kicking someone in the stomach on more than one occasion

How can people who are now well into adulthood say they “never got over” having their hair cut when they were 5 or 8 months or whatever? Hair grows. I’m sure, even as a child, that fact can be grasped.
I think the bob is infinitely prettier than the straggly so called princess hair covered in glittery bows and so forth.

I wasn't a great looking child and the only nice part about me was my hair.

It's so sad that you would think like than . I'd honestly think someone's parents did a poor job of instilling confidence into a child if that's the only thing they thought was nice them.

I'm sure you were nice in lots of other ways be it: kind to others, helpful, polite, good at listening, great at inventing games etc all the really nice bits of people are on the inside. Being what others deem as conventionally pretty is not something that makes you nice its something that you have no control over.

I am nearly 60. I don't think I ever got over having my hair cut when I was 4

I was always made to have close-cropped, short hair, partly because my mother did not entertain the idea of children having a say in anything and partly because she was convinced that this would make my hair curl.

To this day I give hairdressers written instructions about how I want my hair and I don't let them near me until they can repeat them back to me :)

Remind her that being a princess is in no way something to aspire to. And she should thank her lucky stars she isn’t one. Focus on all her wonderful characteristics as person and what she can achieve with the education she’s going to school to get!

This makes so so sad as I could never ever have long hair. My hair cycle is such that it doesn't grow past a certain length. I hated the 'girls have long hair' adoration that took place (and still does). Probably why I further fucked my hair with extensions until I was mid 20s and now in my 30s I have to tie it up every day to cover bald patches and hide my awful short hair.

NoTheresa I grew up where I had nothing. My gf was the rag man who collected what was left after jumble sales and as a family are Saturday nights were cutting buttens and zips off old clothing that not even someone at a jumble sale wanted and sorting the cloth into cottons, wools, leather, polyester etc if there were Childrens clothes that were my size then that is what I wore.

When you grow up with nothing what you have that is solely yours becomes everything.

Added to that I am from mixed heritage and an immigrant family in the 60s who lived in one of the slum areas in a norther town.

My hair even at 4 was everything to me

Fair point.

Kiki has a bob in kikis delivery service. Its a fab film for a 4 year old too!

Sorry, I’ve just seen a picture of Meghan and she has long hair, my mistake. Though I think she would look great with short hair too.

Ripley from Alien3 looks nice with short hair. Reece Witherspoon. Ellen, Halle, Scarlett.

Why is wanting long hair meaning you want to be a princess.

It has never crossed my mind that I want long hair so I can be a princess. Ever.

I have long hair and have never harboured any desire to be a princess. I just like my hair long.
Both DD’s also have long hair. Neither have any princess aspirations that I’m aware of.

It has never crossed my mind that I want long hair so I can be a princess. Ever

When I was growing up long hair was for putting flowers in to go with your cheesecloth top and flares.

I’ve got long hair too, always have had. I don’t in any way associate it with being a princess - but OP’s daughter clearly does.