Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Parking in disabled when pregnant

247 replies

Notagainsusan · 05/09/2019 20:28

So I don't actually think I am bu but I just need someone else to wtf with me and have no one I can rant to in real life other than dh who may soon cut his ears off rather than listen to me again 😛

Good friend is pregnant. I have a 10 week old baby. Yesterday we went to the supermarket together. As we were driving round my friend commented on the lack of baby and parent spaces to which I said oh don't worry he's in his pram anyway so not like I really need the space (I mean he won't be running in front of cars etc and spaces at this shop are quite big so I could easily get the buggy out 😊).

Friend then comments how she can't walk very far atm.
I did internally eye roll at this. She is 7 weeks pregnant. So far in this pregnancy she has had every symptom known to man kind and keeps commenting how her bump is huge already. At 10 weeks post partum I have more of a bump than she does, she is literally stick thin. However I realise I'm being a bit mean here and she is very excited to be pregnant.

Anyway! As we drive around she pulls into a disabled space. I didn't think she had realised so I said oh this isn't parent and child it's disabled. To which she tells me that as she is pregnant she is fine to park in disabled?! I replied saying I didn't think that was true and we should probably move. She said she wasn't and tbh I didn't want the hassle of an argument as she had done me a favour by driving so I shut up.

We get out the car, do the shop, all fine. When we are getting back in the car I was folding the buggy etc when a lady approaches and starts having a go at me for using the space?! Saying how it is not for child and parents. I didn't get a chance to say anything back to this woman as she stormed off mid shout about how inconsiderate I was. Friend just stands there and then raises an eyebrow to me.

In the car I bring up the woman shouting at me and friend just says 'oh don't let her ruin your day'. 😳😳 I said maybe this is a lesson in not using disabled bays unless you're actually disabled and she went in a huff saying how she was feeling really hormonal and not sleeping well so she didn't want to have to walk far ?! She dropped us off at home and it was all a bit awkward.

I'm annoyed that I got the blame for her wanting to use a disabled bay! And that she is using one in the first place!

Prepared to be flamed as I probably should have got her to move but I've no idea how and couldn't face an argument with ds in the back waiting for his stinky nappy to be changed 😂

OP posts:
TheFairyCaravan · 05/09/2019 21:38

I'd love to meet your friend.

When I was pregnant with DS2, 23 years ago, I was in bed or a wheelchair from 26 weeks (I'd been on crutches since 16 weeks) with incredibly severe SPD. He was born at 37 weeks, which was the same time as they were talking about giving me daily pethidine injections. I still didn't park in a disabled space.

Since then I've never got off my crutches, have had 8 major surgeries on my back and pelvis and am in immense pain. I do have a BB now because I can't walk hardly at all. I can't get out of my car unless the door is opened wide and I have a hoist in the boot for my mobility scooter. People like me need those spaces

Had your friend told me she couldn't walk far,at 7 weeks pg, I'd have laughed i her face. Imo you should have refused to get out of the car until she'd moved it.

Robs20 · 05/09/2019 21:42

Totally unreasonable and selfish behaviour from your friend. My 1 year old dd had a blue badge and we rarely used the spaces but occasionally did as we had a whole load of medical equipment to lug around with us to help her breathe. I have a couple of close friends with children on ventilators- they try to live normal lives and get out and about, and people like your friend make it impossible. the spaces are there for people with a serious medical need which means they have limited mobility or another health need which qualifies them for the badge.

Original poster
Notagainsusan · 05/09/2019 21:42

I'm just going to apologise now for not making her move or going home somehow else. I realise I should have made more of a stand.

OP posts:
GabsAlot · 05/09/2019 21:43

Does she want to apply for PIP aswell while shes there

cheeky bitch its not a disability-hope she gets a ticket

Weezol · 05/09/2019 21:46

Pregnancy is a choice, being disabled is not.

wheresthehope · 05/09/2019 21:49

I am 36 weeks pregnant and having a really hard go of it cause lets face it pregnancy sucks but I still don't park in the close parking spots cause walking is good for you!

IsobelRae23 · 05/09/2019 21:51

Oh God she’s one of these ‘First person in the world to ever be pregnant!!’ Stop the press!!

Ffs she is NOT disabled! It’s hard enough that there are few disabled parking spaces in every car park as it is, without twats taking them too.

ellendegeneres · 05/09/2019 21:52

Your friend and beaver are the kind of people that make trying to live a ‘normal’ life fucking harder than it needs to be as a disabled person.

Let’s say it again. Parent and child spaces are a COURTESY. Disabled parking spaces are a LEGAL REQUIREMENT.

Fucking hell, how difficult is it to understand?? If you’re heavily pregnant, use a p&c space, I did. Because I also needed mobility aids and didn’t have a blue badge at the time. And now, if no disabled spaces but there are p&c, I use those. Because my need is greater than the courtesy of a parent being able to get their child in and out. Parent can park on an end and get baby out. I can’t do the same with my wheelchair with curbs etc.

Shiiiiit this winds me right up.
Your mate is an entitled prick. Her baby is a choice she made. Disabilities are not a choice. Hence one being courtesy one being legal requirement.

ellendegeneres · 05/09/2019 21:54

gabsalot I agree, I hope she gets a ticket. I hope it gives her a kick up the arse too. Stupid selfish cow

gilliansgardenbench · 05/09/2019 21:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

duffyluth · 05/09/2019 21:56

@02duffyluth i havent name changed?

No; I wondered because when someone tagged you it had a number, not just the name. You have tagged me and the same thing seems to have happened.

Sallyseagull · 05/09/2019 21:57

I think your 'friend' has issues.

I also think you dont actually like her all that much whether rightly or wrongly.

Anchormann · 05/09/2019 21:59

@Notagainsusan I have a blue badge and struggle to walk anything other than a really short distance. I'd have been fuming if I'd had to park elsewhere because of you're friend. I'm sorry you bore the brunt of someone's anger but your friend needs a reality check!

paradyning · 05/09/2019 21:59

You are ace. Your friend is a cunt.

paradyning · 05/09/2019 22:01

@Beaverdam so they'll be loads of spaces when she parked. But what if they've all gone in the meantime.
Then someone who actually needs the spot cannot park.

BrightYellowDaffodil · 05/09/2019 22:02

I realise I should have made more of a stand.

Don't beat yourself up about it, sometimes we're all caught on the hop by someone else's WTF behaviour! Your friend is an arse, but you didn't encourage her to park in that space and I doubt there was much you could do to stop her.

BritInUS1 · 05/09/2019 22:04

Disabled bays are for people with blue badges, if she doesn't have one she shouldn't park there

ItsGoingTibiaK · 05/09/2019 22:07

Your friend is a twat. If she is convinced that she should be entitled to a blue badge because of her condition, she is perfectly entitled to apply for one - and see how far she gets.

whateverhappenstheremore · 05/09/2019 22:09

If you are heavily pregnant I think it's fine but not at 7 weeks

duffyluth · 05/09/2019 22:11

If you are heavily pregnant I think it's fine but not at 7 weeks

Hmm

What part of taking a parking space dedicated to DISABLED people is 'fine'

Give your fucking head a wobble Angry

PurpleDaisies · 05/09/2019 22:12

If you are heavily pregnant I think it's fine but not at 7 weeks

It is NEVER fine to park in a blue badge space without one.

HarryElephante · 05/09/2019 22:13

Your friend is out of order and so is the lady who had a go at you. Not all disabilities are visible.

ItsGoingTibiaK · 05/09/2019 22:15

@duffyluth If you are heavily pregnant I think it's fine but not at 7 weeks

No, it's not. Disabled bays are specifically for blue-badge holders who have been assessed to certain criteria.

They're not for people who are pregnant and so feel they should be entitled to use them. In the same way they're not for people who have broken their leg and so feel they should be entitled to use them, have a bad back today and so feel they should be entitled to use them, are a bit tired and so feel they should be entitled to use them, don't really fancy walking in the rain and so feel they should be entitled to use them or are just fucking lazy, selfish twats and so feel they should be entitled to use them.

HippyChickMama · 05/09/2019 22:17

It's never ok to use a disabled parking bay without a blue badge. I used P&C parking spaces if possible when heavily pregnant because I had SPD and was on crutches so needed to open the door wide to get out and couldn't walk far but definitely not at 7 weeks. @MoonageDaydreamz I use P&C spaces if I can when out with ds who is 12 as he has Dyspraxia and ASD, he doesn't qualify for a blue badge but has difficulty negotiating a car park safely and a tendency to fling open the car door/bump into cars when getting in and out. I'm not saying this is the case for every parent using P&C spaces with older dc but it's a possibility.

mmmcflurrys · 05/09/2019 22:17

My sisters was the same, 6 weeks pregnant and she wouldn't even change the bin bag!