Parking in disabled when pregnant

[Notagainsusan]

So I don't actually think I am bu but I just need someone else to wtf with me and have no one I can rant to in real life other than dh who may soon cut his ears off rather than listen to me again 😛

Good friend is pregnant. I have a 10 week old baby. Yesterday we went to the supermarket together. As we were driving round my friend commented on the lack of baby and parent spaces to which I said oh don't worry he's in his pram anyway so not like I really need the space (I mean he won't be running in front of cars etc and spaces at this shop are quite big so I could easily get the buggy out 😊).

Friend then comments how she can't walk very far atm.
I did internally eye roll at this. She is 7 weeks pregnant. So far in this pregnancy she has had every symptom known to man kind and keeps commenting how her bump is huge already. At 10 weeks post partum I have more of a bump than she does, she is literally stick thin. However I realise I'm being a bit mean here and she is very excited to be pregnant.

Anyway! As we drive around she pulls into a disabled space. I didn't think she had realised so I said oh this isn't parent and child it's disabled. To which she tells me that as she is pregnant she is fine to park in disabled?! I replied saying I didn't think that was true and we should probably move. She said she wasn't and tbh I didn't want the hassle of an argument as she had done me a favour by driving so I shut up.

We get out the car, do the shop, all fine. When we are getting back in the car I was folding the buggy etc when a lady approaches and starts having a go at me for using the space?! Saying how it is not for child and parents. I didn't get a chance to say anything back to this woman as she stormed off mid shout about how inconsiderate I was. Friend just stands there and then raises an eyebrow to me.

In the car I bring up the woman shouting at me and friend just says 'oh don't let her ruin your day'. 😳😳 I said maybe this is a lesson in not using disabled bays unless you're actually disabled and she went in a huff saying how she was feeling really hormonal and not sleeping well so she didn't want to have to walk far ?! She dropped us off at home and it was all a bit awkward.

I'm annoyed that I got the blame for her wanting to use a disabled bay! And that she is using one in the first place!

Prepared to be flamed as I probably should have got her to move but I've no idea how and couldn't face an argument with ds in the back waiting for his stinky nappy to be changed 😂

@yabbers

What DDA regulations? Do you mean the Disability Discrimination Act? If so, that was repealed and replaced by the Equality Act. If not, am not sure what you mean, so perhaps we are both talking about different things.

It's rare to find P&C available and BB not

It's the opposite way around in my area. Also there are a lot more P+C spaces than BB spaces at most supermarkets around here (Yorkshire)

Your friend is pregnant "by choice"

Inconsiderate is putting it lightly

Saying a pregnant woman who has a mobility issue can’t use a BB space is the same as saying she should use the stairs and not the ramp.

How is it the same?

Well technically only council disabled places are ones that require a blue badge and are enforceable. Ones on private property are a reasonable adjustment but are not enforceable and no penalty is lawfully allowed to be given. Just like parent spaces are not enforceable.

I do think there’s a lack of P&C spaces compared to disabled spaces. If you want an example there are ten disabled spaces and five P&C in my local Aldi car park. I go a few times a week and there’s only ever a maximum of two in the disabled spaces whereas P&C are always filled.

P&C spaces are important because children often open doors quite haphazardly and getting a car seat or pram in and out requires more room too.

Having said that, of course you shouldn’t use a disabled space but I do think they need to offer the same amount of P&C spots as disabled ones. Just my opinion.

I do think there’s a lack of P&C spaces compared to disabled spaces [...] I do think they need to offer the same amount of P&C spots as disabled ones. Just my opinion.

Have a wee think about what you have said. Have a think about the difference between a life changing disability and having a child. Maybe give your head a wobble while you are at it.

I'm speechless at the level of stupidity people are happy to display.

There needs to be significantly more disabled spaces to P&C. The spaces should also be monitored.

@whattodowith - why are DC’s opening the car doors. They should have child locks on them. If there are no free P&C spaces, you park at the far end of the car park which is usually empty and has plenty of room for getting in and out of the car with DC’s.

When I was seven weeks pregnant I had to stop to dry heave and retch every minute or so when walking. Didn't park in disabled parking though. Your friend is being very unreasonable.

I don't drive and have walked/bused to do grocery shopping through each pregnancy, even when in pain. So my sympathy for those not actually disabled by pregnancy enough to get a blue badge "needing" the disabled spaces is non-existent.

I really don't get the necessity for P&C spaces - when I was little my parents would just park at the empty end of the car park if we needed more space to open doors, etc (DM still does this now as she thinks if there are fewer cars nearby it's less likely that someone will scratch the car!). And I wasn't allowed to walk across the car park without holding someone's hand. A lot of the time I see lone adults and people with much older children using the spaces at the supermarkets near us 🤷

I have just read through TFT & I agree that in now way would your friend need to park in a disabled bay.

I do think though that there should either be more parent and child bays as there are not enough at all, I have a 10 month old DD and I am currently 17 weeks pregnant so those bays are a godsend with trying to get the little one into the pram and back into the car especially if she is asleep. The reason for these bays is so you can fit move around the car without possibly bashing any cars door (either by a child flinging it open or by a pram maybe bashing it) I think there should be an age limit on the P&C bays but I don’t begrudge anyone using them as long as they have a child with them.

Personally though I’d rather there just be a decent width between all the bays then there wouldn’t be a need for parent and child bays

I don’t get the children swinging doors open argument for p and c spaces - surely that’s what child locks are designed for?

I had to get on the bus when dd was a baby and I needed shopping.....it didn't kill me I managed without a car so did many many other Mothers without whining.

What about that space being needed for a person with learning difficulties that has no road sense and could run into the road? I've had a blue badge for this exact reason. Does your friend think she is more entitled than someone with a physical or learning disability? She sounds like a poor excuse for a human being, she needs pulling up on this. Post me her address I will happily do it.

HKM94 totally agree

She is wrong. However the lady didn’t know for certain if you had an invisible disability.

However the lady didn’t know for certain if you had an invisible disability.

The lady saw no Blue Badge displayed on the dashboard, that's why she accosted the OP to let her know it wasn't a P+C space.

Your friend clearly thinks she's the only person to ever be pregnant. Yawnnnnnn. YANBU.

My mum has a blue badge and I would be very annoyed at someone without a blue badge parking in a disabled space and I couldn't park. In a car park of a shopping centre we sometimes go to anyone who parks in a disabled space without a blue badge has a large sticker put on one of the rear windows. Very hard to remove. I parked accidentally once on one of these as there were a couple of normal places beside it. It was the last in the row and I have no idea how I missed the blue paint and got one of these stickers. Very embarrassing but have never deliberately parked in a disabled space without having my mum with me and her badge.

Yanbu but your friend is. Pregnancy especially at 7 weeks is not a disability.
I didnt sleep well last night and am tired today so should i park in a disabled space?
No. You suck it up and walk the few extra yards.
Your friend sounds entitled. Most women work till late pregnancy.
My friend has fibromyalgia and cant walk far. She is a wheelchair user. She has a blue badge. We like to go to the shops sometimes.
I would have said something if we couldn't park because of your friend.
In my supermarket they fine people who use disabled spaces without a blue badge.

I really don't get the necessity for P&C spaces

They're not a necessity, they're a nicety. Makes life easier for a specific subset of a stores customers. They're a nice considerate facility. Not essential.

Having said that, of course you shouldn’t use a disabled space but I do think they need to offer the same amount of P&C spots as disabled ones. Just my opinion.

Suggest it to the management at your Aldi then.

I really don't get the necessity for P&C spaces

Well no. But families with young kids spend a lot more than pensioners, for example, in general, so it makes commercial sense for the stores to provide spaces and facilities that make them more inclined to shop there

Your friend is being unreasonable, but that stick wheelchair symbol doesn't mean 'disabled' it means 'accessible' and accessible is for anyone who needs it; like needing space to get a buggy into or out of a car, or a wheelchair.

It's ISO standard 7001 dealing with public information signs. I checked it after reading a post here a long while ago. Your Council's Disability Policy Officer (all district or unitary councils should have one) should be able to confirm what it means.

There are over 100 countries signed up to this ISO standard so that sign has to be the same in all those countries. It isn't going to change. The standard is why international road signs are the same colour, that blue and white.