Child maintenance from rich ex boyfriend

[Hanny3]

I recently found out I'm three months pregnant. I'm no longer together with the father. I will be raising the child by myself as the father doesn't won't anything to do with the child.

He has said he will pay child maintenance. He's a very rich guy and comes from a very rich family. He said to me when where together that he earned £15,000 per month after tax (by working for his dad) and that he had other incomes from his investments. He also has a large personal fortune.

He has said he will pay £1,273 a month in child maintenance. He claims that is the maximum he has to pay according to law.

I'm a student and don't have much money. I have asked if he would be willing to pay more the first two years so I can really focus on finishing my studies. He said no.

My mom and my friends are telling my if I take it to court I would get more per month, and are encouraging me to do so. My ex on the other hand says I would get less if I take it to court.

So I was wondering if anyone knows if I would get more per month if I took it to court? And I'm I totally unreasonable if I think he should pay more the first two years while I'm a student?

Bonjour I think once the child is born she should consider going through CMS, the amount will probably be the same but it means that it will be on more of a legal footing (of course this might get his back up and he might decide to hide his salary). It also means that she can consider a Schedule 1 top up based upon his income because it exceeds the CMS calculation. There’s also the chance of a Calderbank Offer.

It’s quite a complicated area, as is the issue of costs, and if pursued requires a specialist solicitor. It’s not something to take on lightly.

The problem twee with putting her studies on hold is that she may never go back. She could study online but it doesn’t seem to be cheaper anymore. I started with the OU and it was great. I thought of doing another post grad as a hobby but the OU fees have really gone up.

On another note I was at uni with a lot of single parents and they managed ok. She may however be better finding a course near family if they’re happy to help out even if only occasionally.

I doubt however that the op will be back and I can’t say I blame her.

Irma the Boris example made me laugh. What an idiot he’s made of himself, although I do feel sorry for his wife.

@tweebookworm

I get where you're coming from, but I think she can. A single parent in London literally has money thrown at them. She already has a place to live, she's not rough sleeping so rent is the same, subsidised childcare and other grants, maintained loan and now over a grand in child support. That's plenty.

It's not easy to manage physically but the resources are there, without even having to move.

@Genderfree it might not be cheaper but it would allow her more flexibility to work and study at the same time as well as not being tided to living in london. I do agree moving closer to family should be the next step so that she has help in regards to child care etc

“ £180k per year isn't 'rich', is it?”

😂

Isn’t it?!

@ThatFlamingCandle I don't think it is impossible but I don't think it's thr father's responsibility to facilitate this choice

FlorencesHunger-

“My ex doesn't pay cm and never has, I've managed, including full time studies and you will too”

Well done. My DD has given up chasing her ex for child maintenance. Sometimes he pays and sometimes he doesn’t as he thinks it’s voluntary and as she’s working she must be spending his money on herself. In fact she’s just dumped someone who refused to have is own children on a weekend because he found out his ex was going out.

I must say twee I can really recommend the OU and I think you can still get funding. It can however take longer to complete and that’s why I transferred to a traditional university.

@Genderfree I did the OU as well. I was able to study full time but found studying from home suited me more

Mine was some time ago twee, can you still get funding? I know I wouldn’t but my DD might be interested.

Maybe this should all have been thought about before deciding to continue with the pregnancy. Or did you think you'd landed on your feet with his apparent wealth?

@Genderfree not fully sure I was lucky to be able to fund myself so really not any help for the OP there unfortunately

You attitude Ginger is one of the reasons the op probably wont be back. Totally unnecessary comment from a keyboard warrior who gets excited at being nasty to others.

@Genderfree the OPs own attitude is wrong as well though. The father is financially responsible for his child not her. If she feels the money won't be enough she needs to make these reasonable changes if she wants to raise this child.

I’m aware of that twee but it’s already been explained that the court can go passed the maximum CMS calculation for child maintenance when the nrp earns more than £3,000 pm. We've had posters insinuating it wasn’t a proper relationship and he’s the baby daddy (a term used to demean), she got pregnant on purpose so not to work, she’s lazy, a gold digger. It goes on and on. It’s just vile.

The problem is. He didn’t want a child. Legally he’s done everything he needs to. She’s chosen to have this child. She’s also now chosen to do it on her own. She might not have wanted this. But she has chosen this. A woman is the only one legally who can choose in this country. If she wants a child. The mans opinion doesn’t really count. Some people think this is wrong. But legally. It’s true.

Op has chosen to live in London. She’s chosen to study.

All of these are choices. Might not be ones she’s wanted. But they are choices. Regardless.

He didn’t want the baby. She could of aborted. Not had sex. Used contraception etc. (We don’t know the full story). But she’s chosen to go and have a child. Without him

Op could move out of London. Get a job. Stop studying. But she wants to stay in London. This is her choice. She’s chosen to stay and study.

At the end of the day. Whether he’s there or not. She’s chosen these choices

However. Not all of them are applicable. For example it may not be a wise choice to stay in London. In a shared house etc.

Him being rich doesn’t really have anything to do with it. They weren’t married. It doesn’t even seem they had a real relationship. They had sex knowing that a pregnancy can occur (as it can with most). And this is the choice they’ve chosen.

The other thing here is that some women get £1 a week. You’ve still not replied as to what you’d do in THAT situation.

Some women get nothing. My opinion (and remember it’s just my opinion). Is that if you chose to do this alone. Then you’ve got to do it alone. It’s hard bringing up a child with no partner. Or no family or friends close by. Yes women do it. But it’s not easy.

You’ve got to contribute to this child. Whether or not you want too. His choice is to not have anything to do with you or the child in a physical sense. He’s already offered you what I think is a very generous offer of the maximum that he has to legally.

But I am in this situation where it’s possible that the law says I’m entitled to more money from my ex

You’re not though. He’s already offered you the max.

Jubba she said she was on the pill, they had an 18 month relationship, split, got back together and got pregnant. All this is irrelevant as is the fact they are not married as far as child maintenance is concerned. I really wish posters would stop saying he’s done legally what he needs to do i.e. offered the CMS minimum. Schedule 1 applications are becoming more popular, especially for parents that weren’t/aren’t married. There are firms that specialise in this area.

Be grateful? Honeytrap? Advice to alter your life because why should he!! She asked for advice not for all your jealous, judgy comments.

I think a few of you also made some pretty bad choices for the father of your children!

Jubba, I'd also love to know what she'd do if the baby's dad was poor. Would she abort or go ahead? But I doubt she's returning here 😬

The whole scenario is hypothetical until the child is born. No-one knows what could happen between now and six months down the road. Hell the alleged rich father to be could emigrate, rejig his finances to show he earns minimum wage or goodness knows what else. Nothing can be done until the child is born, the alleged father to be is not liable for anything until then.

Jubba -

“The other thing here is that some women get £1 a week. You’ve still not replied as to what you’d do in THAT situation. “

Who are talking to here and how is it relevant to the OP.

I agree marriedwithchildren5. Look at the post by abcdeg dripping with venom and spite and clearly enjoying it.