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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To cancel holiday MIL booked and paid for for us?

148 replies

Pushpushpoosh · 04/09/2019 10:02

For Christmas last year as a gift to the DCs MIL booked for our family and SILs family to go on holiday and it's booked for next week.
Its a UK holiday and looks really fab however my dc are 1 and 3 and our 3 year old has started pre school this week and will then need to take next week off. I didn't think much of it at first however DD isn't settling in very well at nursery and I worry taking her put next week is going to really mess her up settling in wise.
We can't change as SIL is booked into same accommodation and DHs holidays from work are set.
The holiday was going to be great and the kids would love it but I don't want to go at all now because coming back and trying to settle back into nursery again I know is going to be a nightmare.

AIBU to cancel ourselves from the trip and stick with nursery? It won't affect SILs family trip. DH says I'm over reacting and kids are resilient but I don't want to make it harder for DD than it already is.

OP posts:
7yo7yo · 04/09/2019 10:03

I wouldn’t cancel.

Hoppinggreen · 04/09/2019 10:03

Yabu
The kids will be fine, are you sure you want to go? Seems an odd reason to cancel

Soubriquet · 04/09/2019 10:03

Yabu and precious

Have this family time together

Pre-school can wait and she will adapt

Hairyheadphones · 04/09/2019 10:04

I would go on the holiday.

randomsabreuse · 04/09/2019 10:04

Go on the holiday. Enjoy non school holiday space while you can!

Countrylifeornot · 04/09/2019 10:04

Go on the holiday. MIL will likely, and rightly, be furious that she's wasted money on a hokiday that you didn't speak out against at the time, and the dc will miss out on a lovely time with cousins.
Some children do take a while to settle at nursery, start again when you're back from holiday

MilkTwoSugarsThanks · 04/09/2019 10:04

You're over-reacting.

Lumene · 04/09/2019 10:04

I would go.

Chamomileteaplease · 04/09/2019 10:05

You could think of it as a break for your child. She can have a lovely holiday and then go back for a fresh start.

I really wouldn't consider this a problem. Try and look at it positively Smile.

It also seems a real shame for everyone to miss out.

WaterSheep · 04/09/2019 10:05

I think the fallout from cancelling a trip paid for by your MIL will be far worse than a 3 year old missing a week of nursery.

RogersVideo · 04/09/2019 10:06

You are being ridiculous.

Dontlikeoranges · 04/09/2019 10:06

Absolutely go on holiday, it's not fair on anyone to cancel now and will upset your MIL I bet.

You're overreacting, your dd will be fine.

Mrsjayy · 04/09/2019 10:06

Go on holiday your 3 year old will settle in when you go back just you need to start again and that is ok .

Wintersnowdrop · 04/09/2019 10:08

Go on the holiday. Don’t waste your mil’s money. Everyone will enjoy the holiday and it won’t make any difference to your three year old settling at pre school in the long run.

Winterlife · 04/09/2019 10:08

I wouldn’t cancel. Your daughter won’t settle any better in a week.

sheshootssheimplores · 04/09/2019 10:08

Go on holiday. Your daughter is 3!!!!! She would far rather be with her family enjoying herself on a holiday than be in preschool.

mcmooberry · 04/09/2019 10:08

Please don't cancel. It won't end well.

LLOE7 · 04/09/2019 10:08

Go on the holiday- you are over reacting and being a bit precious.

Shoxfordian · 04/09/2019 10:09

Yeah you should go, dc will be fine

Justmuddlingalong · 04/09/2019 10:10

If she's not settling well now, I don't see why you'd cancel, in case she doesn't settle when you get back. It really sounds like a weak excuse to avoid the holiday. I'm with your DH on this, you're overreacting.

Raphael34 · 04/09/2019 10:11

You should have said something straight away. She’s had this booked for 9 months and you want to cancel a week before?? Yabu

MrsDimmond · 04/09/2019 10:11

Good grief just go!
Dc will be absolutely fine. Think of this week as visits and their proper start as after your holiday.
Most reception children visit their school before the summer holidays and then have 6 weeks off before settlung in properly in September.
Go and enjoy a free family holiday!

mankyfourthtoe · 04/09/2019 10:13

Go on holiday
If she's not settling she won't have settled by next week anyway.
Go away, talk positively about the lovely things she'd have been doing at nursery, is there a Facebook page she could look at.

LIZS · 04/09/2019 10:14

Go, she won't be any more unsettled for the break.

Jizzle · 04/09/2019 10:14

Are you normally this crazy OP, you sound very high maintenance, Stop being so precious, the kids will have a great time.