To cancel holiday MIL booked and paid for for us?

[Pushpushpoosh]

For Christmas last year as a gift to the DCs MIL booked for our family and SILs family to go on holiday and it's booked for next week.
Its a UK holiday and looks really fab however my dc are 1 and 3 and our 3 year old has started pre school this week and will then need to take next week off. I didn't think much of it at first however DD isn't settling in very well at nursery and I worry taking her put next week is going to really mess her up settling in wise.
We can't change as SIL is booked into same accommodation and DHs holidays from work are set.
The holiday was going to be great and the kids would love it but I don't want to go at all now because coming back and trying to settle back into nursery again I know is going to be a nightmare.

AIBU to cancel ourselves from the trip and stick with nursery? It won't affect SILs family trip. DH says I'm over reacting and kids are resilient but I don't want to make it harder for DD than it already is.

No, I would still go. It's not like she is missing school, its pre-school and she is young. You could use the holiday to take lots of photos with her, maybe write a holiday diary and talk to her during the holidays about all the fun stories she'll be able to tell them.at preschool when she goes back, which may help put any if her fears to rest while she relaxes and has fun.

Go on holiday, she'll be at school fulltime before you know it and gone will be the days when you can go on holiday outside of peaktimes. Enjoy it whilst you can.

I understand your concerns.

However, please do not cancel.

What an absolutely ridiculous post, of course you shouldnt cancel!!!

If I were you, I'd definitely go. You'll all have such lovely memories. If you don't go, he might still be unsettled at nursery? My ds never settled particularly well. I'm a teacher and would take him out during half terms etc so we could spend lots of time together. The first day back he'd be upset but then i felt this would happen regardless ans at least we had lovely memories

Lots of children struggle settling in. It won't make a difference. Enjoy the holiday and if they have a kids club use it to introduce dc to having fun with other kids then say this is what nursery will be like.

Don't cancel the holiday!

Can’t believe what I’m reading!!! Of course you should go, and to me it sounds like you don’t want to go anyway and are jumping on this ridiculous excuse.

FOR FUCK SAKE PEOPLE RTFT. THE OP IS GOING! THE OPSAID SEVERAL PAGES AGO THAT SHE IS GOING! bangs head against wall

@S1naidSucks you are wasting your breath. Everyone thinks their addition to the thread is sooo important that they haven’t possibly got time to read all the other comments. Head>>>>wall too!

Surely MIL could just cancel the cheque..?

YABU Holidays are precious. Far more important than a week in pre school.

No way would I cancel! Just go! Kids are resilient and a family holiday would be lovely. Don’t be silly.

I understand you are worried but it is a bad precedent to set putting one child ahead of the entire family. Instead use the time away to allay her fears and keep telling her the good stuff. One thing that workedvwith mine was to list things that used to worry him and he was great at now.
I think it would be harsh on everyone to miss out - can you imagine telling your child when your older that you missed out on a family holiday because of her? Well done for asking though - i think you knew you needed perspective.

She's 3. They adapt and you're going to face much harder challenges than this. Nursery staff are well used to new arrivals and will be able to help the transition once back from your holiday.

Your DH is right, children are resilient.

I think you are being a bit PFB and really should go on the holiday. If I was your MIL, I'd be furious if you didn't go for this reason.

YABU

FOR FUCK SAKE PEOPLE RTFT. THE OP IS GOING! THE OPSAID SEVERAL PAGES AGO THAT SHE IS GOING! bangs head against wall

surely MIL could just cancel the cheque

Brilliant 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Cancel the cheque

FFS! For the benefit of the posters who have READ THE FUCKING THREAD, could you please form an orderly queue.

I'm not trying to sound harsh when I say this but a lot of kids not settling does come from parents own anxiety.

I hate to tell ypu this op, but my son took until partway through year 1 before he "settled"

Enjoy your holiday, OP! You can big up what’s fun she’s been having at preschool to her whilst you’re away, and talk about how she can tell all her teachers about it when she gets back. Do preschool do a teddy diary thing? Might be worth asking if you could take it the week you’re off? And send a postcard to her teachers/class etc.

This article might help you on the settling OP.www.ahaparenting.com/Ages-stages/toddlers/helping-your-toddler-with-separation-anxiety
Do go on holiday though

www.ahaparenting.com/Ages-stages/toddlers/helping-your-toddler-with-separation-anxiety
Clucky link (hopefully)